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‘I’m looking forward to meeting little Emma.’ I smile, waving them off.
And then it’s time for Lois and me to saddle up.
Mine is a gentle, laid-back horse called Cookie and I’m enchanted by her, although I can’t help feeling a little self-conscious as I put my foot in the stirrup. I try to heave myself up onto her back, but I don’t quite get there at the first attempt, which obviously gives Lois a right good laugh.
‘Need a bunk up there, Clara?’ she calls. ‘Anyone got a crane handy? Jeez, that poor horse has no idea what it’s in for.’
I’m feeling like an awkward lump anyway, attempting to mount Cookie, without Lois pointing out the obvious. But at my second attempt, I manage it with Sally’s help, steadying myself and gripping the front of the saddle. It seems a frighteningly long way to the ground.
Lois, meanwhile, who’s been waiting for her turn, decides she doesn’t need any help. She rubs her hands together, grins over at me and slots her foot into the stirrup. With a look of dismay, Sally opens her mouth to issue a warning, but Lois ignores her and swings herself triumphantly onto Peppermint’s back.
I stare in disbelief. In her eagerness to show off, Lois has put the wrong foot into the stirrup. And she’s now sitting astride the horse, facing in the direction of its bum.
I’m trying desperately not to laugh, but I’m failing miserably.
The confusion on Lois’s face is priceless.
*****
‘You should put theleftfoot in the stirrup,’ explains Sally. ‘That way, you’re facing the right way when you get on the horse.’
‘Yes, well, I’d sort of worked that out for myself,’ Lois mutters, sliding off the horse. She digs her hands in her pockets and glares at Peppermint as if it was all the animal’s fault.
I’m worried Lois is going to decide this horse-riding lark isn’t for her, after all, and storm off. But after an initial grump, she actually takes it rather well, swinging up on Peppermint’s back and grinning over her shoulder at me. ‘One-nil to you, Clara.’
‘I didn’t think it was a competition.’
‘Everything’s a competition.Life’sa competition,’ she replies, before clicking her tongue and pulling on the reins, and moving off with Sally walking beside her.
We follow on behind and I watch Lois, how she sits tall and confident in the saddle, having quickly shrugged off her earlier humiliation. She’s mellowed since she met Rory. The change is subtle but I notice it. He’s had a calming effect on her and she seems much happier.
She’s so lucky to have a wonderful man like Rory, loving and supporting her.
And I’m glad for her. I really am.
There’s a lump in my throat. Hot tears are pricking my eyelids and I can’t decide if the sudden swell of emotion is because I’d give absolutely anything to be in Lois’s position myself, with Rory, or if I’m just feeling glad that Lois has come through her recent crisis, thanks to her new boyfriend. I guess it’s a mixture of the two.
But I must conquer my feelings for Rory. I need to start thinking of him as a lovely friend who’s made my stepsister smile again.
After her fiancé, well-known local businessman Ronnie Weeks, jilted her a week before their no-expense-spared wedding, Lois was obviously devastated. She went to ground to lick her wounds and I knew that her pride was hurt as much as anything. Lois hates people feeling sorry for her and she coped with her trauma by lying low in her room and staying away from people. I kept gently urging her to get back to painting watercolours as therapy, but I should have known that she would do thingsherway; and that she’d bounce back, which she always does, in her own sweet time. And sure enough, nearly six months after Ronnie ended their engagement, she has Rory in her life and she’s smiling again.
I keep telling myself I’m so pleased for them. But it’s hard. When he puts his arm around her and kisses her and she smiles up at him, and they think no one else is watching, I feel as if the knife that’s permanently lodged in my stomach these days digs in a little deeper.
I’ve liked Rory ever since school, and when we were working alongside each other in Gran’s garden, I allowed myself to believe that he might actually have feelings for me.
But life is never that simple, of course.
I was unaware the pair had met and were getting to know each other, and I was actually there when Lois asked Rory out for the first time.
Lois deserves some happiness after her split with Ronnie, and having grown up with a mother like Irene, who must be the least maternal woman in the world.
I’m still finding it tough, though.
Maybe one day, I’ll be able to look back on it all and smile...
*****
A little while later, after our lesson and a walk over to the Tack Room Café on wobbly legs that feel like we’ve been riding the range all day, Lois offers to get the coffees.
