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Adam nods as if it’s exactly what he expected. “You’ve been dealing with everything here, haven’t you?” He looks around the kitchen.
I push down the guilt. “As much as I can, the shop keeps me pretty busy. And last night, I went to visit…a friend.” My mouth stumbles trying to be economical with the truth. I spent the entire night with a lover while Grandad was alone on the floor.
“This is your answer then.” Adam’s smile is sympathetic. “You’ve taken over all his responsibilities. So, he’s let go. I see it all the time with the elderly. As soon as they fall ill and need to stay in hospital, they seem to let go of their mental reins. It’s as if the responsibilities, or maybe the familiarity of their routine, have been holding them together, like…” Adam pauses, searching for an explanation. “Like a rubber band holding a bundle of sticks, as soon as it’s released, everything scatters.”
“So, it’s my fault. Because I took over.”
“No, no.” He hurries to correct me. “It’s just how things are. I saw it with my own grandfather. He used to go out to the post office every week on Thursdays and stop for groceries on the way home. He handled his bank account and his pension payments. Then he got pneumonia which forced him to stay at home. His memory deteriorated very soon after that. With Hedge.” He glances up towards the door that leads to Grandad’s room. “After his neck fracture, he couldn’t carry out his usual work. If he hadn’t broken his neck, something else would have happened next month or next year. It’s just how things are. And you’ve made sure he has a comfortable warm home and good healthy food. He’s in a much better condition and his neck is healing gradually. The memory thing is inevitable and would have happened as soon as he was too old to work.”
“So, what can I do?”
“The first thing I’d say is don’t be afraid of letting him play an active role, even if it’s just for show. Let him sit in the shop with you and talk to customers, include him in your decision making about the business. He needs to feel like himself, the self he’s been for the last few years. The other thing is don’t correct him if he gets things wrong. You’re not the only one worried about his mental decline, he’s worried too, I guarantee it. And” – Adam raises his brows for emphasis – “frightened. Older people are always afraid of ‘losing it’. He may not remember meaningless things like lunch because they don’t really matter. But he will remember things that affect him emotionally. What I mean is, if something upsets him, it will stay with him, prey on his mind. So, my advice is don’t point out his mistakes. If he tells the same story again and again, try to listen and engage with him.”
“And is there something to help him improve…or at least slow down the decline?”
Adam nods. “Exercise is always good.”
I almost choke on my tea. “With a broken neck?”
He laughs. “I mean mental exercise. Engage him in talking.” He thinks for a second or two. “My advice is to introduce different subjects. If he starts to talk about his bees, ask him about other insects, make him answer new questions. If he talks about honey, ask him about the price of honey thirty or fifty years ago. Ask him questions about the past, about the island’s history. Get his mind working, the worst thing you can do is assume he needs the rest and leave him to sit quietly by himself.”
I wince, actually wince. Adam notices and gives me a sympathetic smile. “Don’t beat yourself up about this, it’s what everyone assumes, that an elderly sick person needs peace and quiet.”
How many days had I left him alone in the kitchen with nothing for company except a blanket and a plate of sandwiches? Tears sting the back of my eyes.
“I’ve been in the shop all day…” I start to think of ways to combine work with looking after him and sitting with him.
“Elodie.” Adam interrupts my thoughts. “Don’t try to do this by yourself. Caring for a sick or elderly person isn’t easy, and you do need respite. It won’t help him if you break down. What support do you have?”
“I have someone who often comes to sit with him so I’m not alone. I’ll find ways, don’t worry.”
He gives me a long considering look but says nothing.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Hal
“Elodie, I get it. Of course, you can’t leave him until he’s back on his feet.”
She tries to get out of bed, but I pull her back. “It’s barely 9pm. You said we had a couple of hours.”
“We’ve had a couple of hours already. I don’t like leaving Doris alone with him, even if she’s staying over tonight, it’s not her job.”
“One more hour, we can even talk about your favourite subject. Now the building is almost done, it’s time to paint and decorate and you can advise me about colours.”
“You know just how to seduce a girl.” She giggles and snuggles up to me under the covers. “But I happen to know this great guy who helped with my shop. He lives next door and has lots of tools.”
“A guy?” I narrow my eyes at her. “Tools?”
She tilts her head back showing me her lovely throat. “Aww, you can’t be jealous. I’m sure you’ll like him if you could only see him through my eyes.” She starts to roll away. “But I should go.”
“Not yet.” I capture her hand. “Stay and introduce me to this guy you seem to like so much. Maybe show me how much you like his tools.”
I like the way she shakes her head with exasperation, it spurs me on. “Stay, I promise to make it worth your while.”
“You know we could have a lot more time if you came over to my bedroom. And a lot more space.” She waves a hand at the tiny camping pod.
I release her hand and sit up in bed, my mood already cooling.
