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Chapter 14
Fox~
The flight back had to have been the worst experience of my life. Driving the distance would have taken longer, especially considering that I probably would have gotten pulled over a dozen times, making the travel time longer than necessary.
Once I got into town, I’d gone to Kincaid’s, and that’d done nothing but fuck me up further. While the code to her building still worked, my key to her apartment hadn’t. Kincaid had changed the locks, and it’d been everything to not set a match to the entire building.
With Kincaid not home or answering her goddamn phone, I’d had no choice but to throw myself on Saxton’s mercy. Even though I knew that the odds were slim that he’d be willing to do anything to lessen the madness, I had to try or go fucking crazy. I had no idea how I became the bad guy in this scenario, but I was.
I felt like I was.
I banged on the door to Saxton’s condo like I was the police, and he was a parolee breaking the rules. I was surprised that the entire wall didn’t shake with the force of my fist. I could have always called first, but why would he answer the phone when his priority was Kincaid?
The door swung open, an annoyed Saxton on the other side, his face quickly morphing from annoyed to surprised. “Where’s the fire?” I shot him a look and the guy took pity on me. “Come on in,” he muttered as he opened the door further.
Not worried about Hastings being in audience, I turned around to face him. “Where is she?”
Saxton shut the door behind him. “Fox-”
“I didn’t hook up with that girl, Voss,” I told him. “I swear it.”
“Look, Fox-”
“I didn’t fuck around with anyone,” I repeated. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“Does it even matter?” he asked. “You told her that you didn’t want to ever see her again. What does it matter if you hooked up with some girl or not? Telling someone that you never want to see them again is as about as broken up as you can get.”
“I was mad!” I thundered. “I was…just so fucking mad, Saxton.”
He let out a deep sigh. “I get that, but this is Kincaid that we’re talking about, Fox.”
“So, what?” I snapped. “She can break my heart, but I can’t break hers?”
“Exactly,” he shot back. “You’re still missing it, Harrington.”
“Missing what?”
“You can’t break Kincaid’s heart,” he said. “No one can. The girl is damaged, Fox.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” I asked, running my hands through my hair, ready to pull out every fucking strand.
“Fox, Kincaid is emotionally damaged,” he repeated. “The girl has always been a tough cookie, but when Apollo died, it fucked her up. The girl can turn her emotions on and off like a goddamn light switch, and it’s a scary fucking thing.”
“I know she can, but she can’t keep that up forever,” I denied.
“Oh, trust me, there are people who can,” he replied. “And Kincaid is one of them.”
“So, what are you saying?”
“Kincaid is too damaged to process emotions in a healthy way,” he continued. “Instead of taking the hit, working through it, then moving on, she shuts that shit down and focuses on the logic of her situation. For eight years, her focus has been on finding out what happened to her brother. So much, in fact, that I’m not sure she’s fully mourned for him yet. It’s like she can’t put it to rest until she gets justice for him.”
“I get that. I do.” And I did. I understood her cause and the motivation behind it. “But what’s that have to do with us?”
Those grey eyes of his were filled with so much pity that it was hard to maintain eye contact with the man. “It means that she will do whatever she needs to do in order to not feel whatever it was that you made her feel last night when you told her that you never wanted to see her again,” he answered. “I’ve known her most of my life, and I’ve only seen her break down a few times, the most recent when you went to her condo that first time since initiation night. She’s not equipped to deal with an onslaught of emotions like that. The girl is damaged, and do you want to know the worst of it?”
“What?”
“Kincaid knows that she’s damage, and she’s fine with it,” he replied. “As long as she’s on her mission to avenge Apollo, she’s okay with what it takes to get the justice that she’s searching for.”
