AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Right now, what I want is to finish this piece of shit.”
I run a hand over the back of my neck, trying to relax the sore muscles in my upper back. My body is hurting like hell from Friday night’s game. The first of the championship where I outdid myself on the ice. I don’t think I’ve ever played so well. Frustration, resentment, annoyance, and a whole weekwithoutnews only served to fuel me. The empty place in the bleachers was enough to provoke me.
At the same time, what did I expect, exactly? That she shows up when I threw her away like shit? Honestly, I would hate me too if I were her.
Not only in her place, but also in mine too. Because even though I deliberately chose my buddy over her, it still hurts and, tonight, there is a muscle that hurts me even more than the others. And this one, I would really like to forget. To be able to put it on pause, to make it stop pounding so hard, banging against my ribcage every time I pass a blonde who looks like the girl who broke it.
Because of me.
“Nolan.”
“What?”
I frown at Milo, who is chewing on his lip to keep from saying something. He gets up in silence, leaves the living room to come back a few minutes later with a bottle of tequila. I look at him, confused. He puts a shot under my nose, sits down, and says, “You don’t want to talk? Fine, then we’ll drink. Do you know why?”
I shake my head.
“Because a hangover never killed anyone.”
“What about a heartbreak?”
My question slips out like a pathetic confession. He scrutinizes me for a moment without saying anything, then fills the first glass to the brim. I stare at the clear liquid and think back to everything that brought me here. Edgar doesn’t talk to me anymore. He acts as if nothing had happened, letting the distance grow between us. The atmosphere in the team sucks, because our captain is pouting and pissed off at us over the slightest mistakes. Especially me. I keep my mouth shut, because I’ve earned it and I just need my buddy to trust me again. If for that I have to endure his silence, his hatred, and his disappointment. If it takes years, then that is how long I’ll wait. Never mind my own suffering.
I want everything to go back to how it was.
I grab the shot and drink it down.
“I miss her,” I say to myself.
Milo looks at me, sighs then drinks in turn. He pours another round without even asking and I swallow again. The alcohol burns my throat, but the feeling it makes in my veins makes me feel good. I swallow, pushing my memories deep into my gut of that day when everything changed. When she left with Leo to never to return. A week is a long time, especially when thesilence weighs so heavily. Nobody has any news, at least none they want to tell me. And even though I wanted more than a million times to ask how she was, where he had dropped her off, I refrained. Because I don’t have the right.
“I couldn’t help it,” I say. “I’ve known Edgar for twenty fucking years. He’s my best friend.”
“I know.”
“And Scar…”
I don’t finish my sentence. Scarlett is Scarlett. My best friend, the first girl I ever really loved. The one who drives me crazy. Makes me laugh, even when I’ve had a shitty day. Who annoys me three-quarters of the time and makes bad jokes. Who always responds to my remarks with jabs and never gets mad at me, even when I tell her she looks terrible. The one who loves pissing me off, giving me the middle fingers for no reason, pushing me in the halls just because she thinks I’m taking up too much space. The one I trust. All the time.
It’s Scarlett.
MyScarlett.
I close my eyes, feeling bile rising in my throat. Milo says nothing and hands me a third shot. He doesn’t skimp on the quantity, and I can already feel my cheeks heating up.
Will I regret tomorrow? Yeah.
Do I care? Absolutely not.
Right now, I just want to forget everything. Just for one night.
***
I sit up on my bed, resting my elbows on my knees while staring at an invisible spot in my room. I hear the guys in the living room who have been busy for about ten minutes. I got home before them and didn’t move from here, even when I heard them come back. The reason is obvious. I avoid Edgar like the plague. I feel like I’m 12 and not taking responsibility for mybullshit. I chose after all. My best friend came before the girl I fell in love with. I shouldn’t be locked in here like a jerk, waiting for whatever, while our relationship is tense.
When he came home the same night he found out, I apologized. I continued to deny, because if I’m going to lose Scarlett, it might as well not be for nothing. He listened carefully to me telling the same lies as before.
It was a mistake, and it will never happen again.
