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It occurred to me that I’d just opened up to a man I didn’t know. One who was my fated mate—but was also a fae king of the night court.
“It doesn’t matter.” I changed the subject abruptly.
“Clearly, it does.” He shot me a look.
I shot him the same look back. “Drop it. It’s your turn to spill your fucking soul to me.”
He barked out a quick laugh. “Thought I’d already done that.”
“Not to the extent I just did.” I stepped away from the books and leaned up against the wall. “And we never finished that conversation about possibly having sex.”
He shot me a dark look. “We’re not fucking unless you want to, Akari. And not just because you want to keep the moon in the sky, or prevent the damned dragons from coming in and trying to kill us all—because youwantto solidify a mate bond with me, and because youwantto connect in that way. I can deal with the moon for as long as I have to.”
I wished I believed him.
Not about the sex; Ididbelieve him about that. He hadn’t tried to touch me or push me into anything at all; he had respected my space, and was trying to prove to me that I was no longer a prisoner.
But I wished I believed him about the moon.
It had begun to set multiple times throughout the day—and every time, it had been because of me.
If the moon fell, all night magic would disappear with it, until it rose again.
And I’d wanted my revenge at any cost, including the moon, but that was before I knew the truth about Espen’s involvement in the horrors of my past.
Now that I knew he hadn’t played a role in what had happened, I was… uncertain.
I didn’t want a mate, did I?
Did I want the night kingdom to fall?
Did I want Espen to lose his life, or me to lose mine with him?
Stars, I had no idea what I wanted or didn’t want.
What was I supposed to do when everything I knew or thought I knew was false?
How was I supposed to make decisions now?
“You look like you’re overthinking something,” Espen remarked, still rearranging books.
I made a noncommittal noise, and he chuckled. “Two minds think through things better than one.”
Not willing to let him into my tumultuous thoughts, I changed the subject back to the safe place it had been before:
Sex.
I found it incredibly ironic that sex was the safe topic between us.
“If we don’t seal the bond, but I remain in the castle, we can still begin removing the power from Horvis.”
Espen lifted an eyebrow at me. “How would you propose we do that?”
“Ripping all of the power from his hands at once will only lead to uprising. We’d need to slowly and subtly begin retaking control of the things you should be in control of already.”
“I won’t be able to focus on that and the moon, especially with you here, looking like everything a man could ever want,” he countered.
The easy way he gave that compliment warmed me a bit.
