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“Remember when you asked about being selfish? That right there is selfish. Ethan is allowed to live his own life. You can’t hold him back. This training is good for him because it is giving him a chance to get over you. Do you know how hard it was for him to see you with all these other men when he wants you so bad? I can’t even imagine how difficult it would be if Roxy didn’t love me as I did her. It would be like a constant stab in the gut.”
“I do love him, Henley.”
“I’m not talking about the love you have for a brother or a friend, Riley. I’m talking about that love deep down inside your gut. That love that takes your breath away when you feel it pulled away from you. The kind of love that makes your life worthless unless they are in it.”
I opened my mouth to say that I felt that for Ethan, but did I? I couldn’t remember a time that I felt it in my gut—except these last four weeks. Was that the pregnancy or my feelings for Ethan?
“Someday, you are going to look at a man and know that no matter what happens, you would do anything for them. You would give them anything, sacrifice everything you have to have them in your life. When you feel that, then you’ll know that you love them. Then you will know that it’s right.”
“Is that how you felt with Roxy?”
“Yes. That is precisely how I felt with Roxy. I could not imagine a life without her right beside me. I couldn’t even imagine having another woman in my bed. It was Roxy or nothing.”
I smiled sadly at him. “I’m glad that you have her.”
“You’ll find someone, Riley. I promise your time will come.”
He gave me another hug and then left, telling me he’d see me later. I curled up on the couch and turned on the television. The only thing I had planned today was to watch stupid movies, eat popcorn, and cry.
* * *
I was up earlyon Saturday and was glad that my morning sickness had started to lessen slightly. I had a busy day, as I was going to the store for Rebecca and then cooking for them. I had every intention of getting it done and being gone before Ethan showed up later this afternoon. The last thing I needed was to run into him with his new woman without a huge buffer of people around us.
I hit the store, gathered everything on the list needed, and headed to the house. Rebecca was seated at the table, her coloring off. “How are you feeling, Rebecca?”
She smiled at me. “Not so well today, Riley. Can you help me get to the couch?”
“Absolutely.” I helped her get up, and we shuffled to the living room. Her energy was seriously lagging, and she was breathing hard as we finally got to the couch. I helped her lie down and spread a blanket over her.
She put her hand out to my belly as I leaned over her. “You take good care of my grandbaby.”
I covered her hand and held it tightly against my stomach as I sat. “I will, I promise.”
“And you’ll make sure you tell them lots of stories about me, right?”
It was taking everything in me not to break down and sob as I nodded. “Of course, I will, Rebecca.”
“Never let my children forget I loved them.”
Tears prickled my eyes. “They know, Rebecca. They know.”
She smiled and then sighed as she closed her eyes. “Can you go get Richard for me?”
“Absolutely, I’ll be right back.”
I patted her hand and studied her face. Her color was really off. I quickly headed outside where Richard was in the back shed working on some lawn equipment. “Richard, Rebecca asked for you.”
“Alright,” he called over his shoulder. “I’ll be there in a few.”
I twisted my hands. “Richard, I think you need to come now.”
He turned and looked at me. Maybe my face showed my concern, or perhaps it was my voice, but he grabbed a rag and began wiping his hands as he rushed to the back door.
I followed him into the house and then to the living room. “Rebecca, you needed me.”
There was silence, and Richard went to his knees. “Rebecca? Rebecca, sweetheart, don’t go. Not yet, please don’t leave me yet.”
My hand flew to my mouth, and I turned as the tears exploded from my eyes. No! Not before he got here! I rushed to get my cellphone and hit my brother’s number.
“Henley, get to the Winstons’ immediately! It’s Rebecca.” I couldn’t say another word and hung up the phone. I heard Richard’s deep soulful sobs in the other room, and I put my face in my hands and cried.
