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I let out a humorless laugh. "Yeah, it didn't really pertain, so I wasn't going to sit there and recount it. I also didn't mention that I tried to evangelize her." I said, remembering the scene. "It freaked her out a little. I think that was what made her let me go."
"You evangelized her? What's that mean?"
"I don't know—I asked her about Jesus. She had a gun pointed at me, and I was thinking about heaven, and I just asked her if she knew Jesus."
Alec shifted on the couch, staring at me like he wanted to hear more. I gave him a little smile and a shrug.
"I was scared because she was whacked-out," I said.
"You'd have to be to pour gas on someone."
"Well, I was looking at her, not knowing what to do, and I just remembered my pastor joking around one time, saying if you wanted to get somebody to leave you alone, just tell them you're living for Jesus now. So, I just asked her where she stood, you know, spiritually."
He let out a little laugh. "You are kidding me."
"No, I'm serious. And it really helped, I think. She looked at me differently after that, and she didn't even try to hurt me."
"That's hilarious. I can't believe you asked Sara Wilcox if she knew Jesus."
"I got the idea that she wasn't interested," I said.
"Yeah," he agreed. "But you never know. Maybe she'll go back to it one day."
"Yeah, maybe," I agreed. I sat back on the couch, feeling dazed. I stared absentmindedly at the water. "I don't know why it felt like the right thing to say. I've never just come right out and asked someone that." I smiled and shook my head as I spoke, and Alec reached out and put his hand on my knee.
"I'm just glad you're okay," he said.
"I am. I'm okay."
"I need you to know something, Grace."
"What?" I asked, turning to look at him.
He reached up and touched the side of my face. "You're not second best. You aren't second to anyone. There's no other person or situation I'm longing for. If I wanted something else, I would have gone and got it by now. You are like a rare diamond—a huge, rare, perfect diamond that's so rare and wonderful, it's like you shouldn't even exist. If anyone should be worried that they're not good enough, it's me. Also, I had a test, Grace, medical testing and bloodwork just to make sure I won't give you any—"
"No, no, what?" I said, cutting him off. He was speaking quickly, and it was a lot to take in, so I put my hand up and told him to stop.
"Just let me talk," he said. "I realized you were the one, and then instantly, it was a goal to win you back. That was one of the first things I did. I had a physical to make sure I wasn't carrying anything. I couldn't give you the gift you can offer me, but I can at least make sure I don't physically give you anything."
I was not used to having conversations like this with Alec. I was prepared to let him in on some of my feelings during this trip, but until now, our relationship had not been about that. I was nervous and my first reaction was to pass it off like I didn't know what he was talking about. But I took a deep breath.
"You didn't have to do that," I said, my heart pounding.
"I did," he said. "It's the least I could do. There's nothing I can do to take back what happened to you this morning," he said. "And I can't take back the years we lost. All I have is from here forward, and I want you to know that I'm clean. There's no way I can be as pure as you, but I'm medically fine, and my intentions are clean."
I sunk my face into my hands, massaging my eyebrows.
"And I'm really sorry that I even have to clarify that. I'm sorry about the time I wasted," he added, shaking my leg a little. "I want you to know that I'm not thinking about anyone else. I'm not now, and I never will be. I learned my lesson. I-I've had this whole epiphany. I risked losing you once. There's no way I would do it again. I've seen what's out there, and you're the diamond, Grace. It doesn't matter where I go or who I meet. No city and no other woman can compare."
I had been planning on telling Alec that my feelings had intensified, but I couldn't get the words to come out of my mouth—not after everything he was saying. I gave him a shy smile, and I let my biggest worry come out of my mouth. "She was pretty. I wish she hadn't been so pretty. But I'm actually okay. I hate thinking about drama with her being arrested and maybe going to court or whatever, but I'm more okay with everything than I thought I would be. Yea, though I walk through the valley… "
Alec stared at me. He reached up and touched my face. He looked at me curiously, letting his fingertips fall on my nose and cheek as he moved slowly. "You're way prettier than she is," he said. "And I'm sorry about the drama. She came to the gate this morning and asked Barry to let her in. I never dreamed she'd try to hurt you. I am so sorry. It hurts my heart to think about that."
"No, it shouldn't," I said. I put my hand out to touch his arm. "But thank you for saying that I'm prettier. That was good. Good job on that." I grinned at him, and he laughed. I was a little zonked from everything and it made my voice sound groggy.
"You are prettier," he insisted. "And I'm not just saying that because you're my girlfriend. You actually are." It was the first time he had said the word girlfriend, and I was too nervous to think of anything cool to say in response. I wanted to acknowledge that he said I was his girlfriend and I agree with it, but I just couldn’t think of a smooth way to do it.
"I love these clothes Audrey got me," I said, instead.
