AllFreeNovel
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But it feels empty. Lonely. It's big, which is nice, but... there's no one else to take up that space.
I toe off my shoes and close the door behind me. My body seems on the brink of collapse the second my heels are off. The ache that I'm so used to after every workday starts to creep into my body again. It's usually just in my wrists and feet and shoulders, but it seems to be everywhere today, demanding my attention.
And there's that headache that's starting up again. It's pounding against my temples and forcing my brain to come up with every bad situation that could ever happen to me and it isn't helping at all.
I glance down at my phone and see that it's only noon. It's probably the first time I've had an unexpected day off in ages, and it shows. The exhaustion creeping into my body feels like it's coming directly from my bones and makes me feel like a thousand pounds have just been dropped onto my shoulders.
"Fuck it," I mutter to myself, storming off to my bedroom. It's still the same as I left it this morning, with everything put away and my bedsheets pushed to one side of the bed. I start to shrug off my clothes as I open up my closet, reaching for the large black locked box that sits in one corner.
It's been a while since I've treated myself. My fingers practically fly over the combination lock, and it clicks open with ease.
I can almost feel the weight fall off my shoulders when I open the box. It's my growing collection of sex toys and props that I use for my website, and it was meant to be kept a secret, but... I guess it's already too late for that.
It's a pretty impressive collection, even in my eyes. It started in early college, and back then, it was still pretty tame, but I managed to collect more than a few things over the years. There are a few dildos of different sizes, a few vibrators, each with different designs, ropes, blindfolds, gags, stockings and socks, whips, buttplugs, candles, and anything else that I could fit in there at this point, honestly.
I pull the box out of its place in the closet and lift it, with a grunt, onto my bed, before crawling next to it. I start reaching in, laying out all of my toys on the sheets, and letting my eyes linger on them for a few seconds.
It's been a while since I've taken the time to do this just for myself. Most of the time, this is all in front of a camera. But today feels like the right day to do this. Suppose everything goes wrong? Oh well. There's nothing I can do about it now.
It takes a minute or two before everything is out of the box and laid out in front of me. It takes up a good part of my bed with everything evenly laid out on display, and I look over all of them for a long moment.
My hand seems to naturally move towards one of my vibrators, a purple one with too many settings, and is usually a bit too intense for me on a regular day. After that, I instinctively know what I want, and my hand keeps reaching out for more.
The blindfold. The bottle of unflavored lube. The metal handcuffs.
That's enough for now,I think to myself. My heart is already racing in my chest, and my breathing is starting to come out in little fluttering gasps. I don't know if it's because of all the stress or because I've been ignoring this for far too long.
My hands are nearly shaking as I push aside all the other toys and scramble to take off the rest of my clothes. I toss them to the side, mentally promising myself to clean up afterward. I'll clean up the toys and the box later. I just need this for myself right now.
The second I'm naked, the world seems to narrow down just to me and the few toys I've chosen for today. I squeeze a little bit of lube onto the silicone head of my vibrator, spreading the cold liquid around with my fingers to warm it up. My eyes flicker over to the other few toys that I've chosen, making my heart skip another few beats in my chest.
I hold the vibrator in between my knees for a moment as I reach out to the handcuffs. The weight and the sharp cold of the metal always surprise me a little, but it doesn't stop me from clamping them around my wrists tight enough to make me feel the slight pressure of them on me. There's a metallic clatter as I reach out to the black blindfold and put it on.
The world narrows down even more to just what I can feel and the darkness surrounding me. The air around me is slightly cold on my overheated skin, and I can feel the soft padding of my sheets and mattress under me.
My hands reach out slowly to take hold of the vibrator, and my entire body seems to move in slow motion as I lower myself back onto the bed, letting my full body weight press into the mattress as my breathing hitches in my throat.
My fingers slide up and down the length of the handle of my vibrator, trying to feel for the raised buttons on the side as I gently press the head of the vibrator against my clit. I would usually try to tease myself a little bit more, but the lingering adrenaline in my veins pushes me to rush through this and...
And if I'm being completely honest with myself, the short interaction I had with Mister Fletcher still lingers in my mind. It's stupid, with everything going on that my crush on him is still hanging over my head, but...
There was something about the way that he was looking at me. The way that he spoke to me. The gentleness that I didn't know was there before—his hand, reaching out for mine and the way that it felt so... safe.
My fingers find the button, and I click it without hesitation. The vibrator buzzes to life and sends a wave of pleasure shooting through me, my body tensing up for a moment before I'm able to relax into the feeling again.
My heart is racing in my chest as my mind creates a new fantasy for me to live through. It used to take time and thought but with this much practice and today's events to inspire me, it almost comes naturally.
It would be in his office. My fantasies usually are. Mister Fletcher would notice that I look upset after everything that happened today.
Sit downhe would say in that voice that he uses sometimes. I don't know if he does it on purpose, but it's just the right amount of commanding and gentleness that makes my knees go weak.
I go to sit down at his desk, but I don't look him in the eye. I'm still upset. He can see it. I can feel his eyes on me.
How are you feeling?His voice is genuine, and I know that he's feeling bad for me, to some extent. I feel a flush rise up on my face, and when I try to speak, my words get caught in my throat.
I'm feeling fine.
I know that's a lie.He almost cuts me off, and there's a sternness in his voice that makes me shiver. The silence that rings through the office almost feels like it's crushing me, making me swallow hard as I try to think my way out of this.Tell me the truth.
