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Owen knew he was going to get it, whether he wanted it or not.
“I think you’re a coward.”
“What did you say?” Fury flared to the surface, hot and ready to erupt.
Bran stared his friend down, leaning forward. “You, Owen Fernsby, are a coward, and you know it. I think you always have been, but you’ve just hidden behind this facade of arrogance and pride. Now you face that realization. You have seen the man you can be, based on these last weeks, but I think you’re scared to admit that you have been an ass since the day you married Selena. So instead of admitting you were wrong, you have sent your wife away and run off with your tail between your legs.”
Owen sank back in the chair. That statement hit the nail on the head. But it wasn’t so simple. Owen dropped his head into his hands. “What am I going to do?”
“That depends. Do you want a life with Selena?”
Owen brought his head up. “More than anything. I love her, Bran. I can say it now that I’ve pushed her away, but I love her more than life itself. She probably hates me right now.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Bran sat next to his friend and gave his shoulder a friendly pat. “Perhaps this whole amnesia fiasco was a good thing.”
“How so?”
“In a way, it has given you the opportunity to learn about yourself again. When we went to those clubs and parties, didn’t it feel like they were speaking about another person when they told you how you used to be?”
“Yes. It was appalling. Now that I remember it all, I feel even worse. How could I have been so callous? I have a lot to make up for. You are right, I was hiding. When we went our separate ways to university back in the day, the older boys picked on me and others like me; timid, smaller. I slowly noticed the fear and respect the old boys got from us younger lads. As I grew older, I realized I could harness that power, and I did. By my last year at university, I had reinvented myself. The timid, kind boy had vanished and in his place was an arrogant, ruthless man who would stop at nothing to get what he wanted.”
“You enjoyed feeling powerful.” It was a statement, not a question.
“It was an aphrodisiac to see people bend over backwards to do what I said. I enjoyed having control. Those traits served me well in the army, but I realize now, I was wrong.”
He was still there, that caring boy who just wanted to be content in his life. Selena made him happy, of that he was certain, but he had to earn her love. Since his injury, he had not been earning her love, merely making her fall in love with another version of himself. Now that he had all his memories, Selena would fear him, and it was quite possible she would never trust him again. He had to show her he had changed—for good.
“Bran, will you help me?”
“Of course. Whatever you need.”
“It won’t be easy, but it’ll be worth it, for Selena.”
A plan formed. It had to work. If it didn’t, then he would only have himself to blame. He laid out his idea to Bran, who readily agreed to help.
Over the next two weeks, Owen went about making good on many of the wrongs he had done over the years. He met with his solicitor and London agent to sort out any business dealings that needed to be put to rights. He raised wages for the workers at his warehouses, sold all his shares in a few shady businesses, and withdrew his membership from several clubs.
Owen made personal calls to several associates whom he had cheated out of money and promised to pay them back on lost earnings. Along the way, he spoke with the Office of Foreign Affairs and Army officials about his part in the gold scheme. Now that he had all his memories, he could assure them that there had been no other gold sent from New Zealand except the package that had been stolen from Selena. He confirmed that the markings on the map were sites of other possible gold mines. Because of his cooperation, no charges were brought against Owen, and he resigned his commission from the Army.
The days were long, and he was mentally and physically exhausted, but after each meeting, Owen felt like a weight had been lifted from his spirit. He felt lighter. Sometimes a tiny voice in the back of his mind told him he was mad, that he shouldn’t give away all he had worked so hard for, but he pushed that voice down. Never again would he be persuaded to use his title or position to intimidate others.
Finally, everything had been set right, or restitution had at least been set in motion. The only thing left was to see Selena. Would she take him back? Could she ever forgive him for everything he had done? There was only one way to find out. So, one sunny summer day, he rode home to Stonegate.
Owen rubbed his sweaty palms on his trousers, not for the first time, as he neared the manor house. During the drive home, he had gone over a million ways to apologize to Selena. When the carriage pulled up, he didn’t wait for it to stop before bounding out the door and up the stairs.
Richards greeted him at the door. “Good day, my lord. It is good to have you home.”
“Is Lady Fernsby home?”
“Yes, sir, she is in the greenhouse.”
Owen hurried down the hall to the doors leading to the gardens at the back of the house. Hopefully, Selena had liked her surprise when she’d arrived home. He had not gone back on his promise to build her a greenhouse. During their time away in London, Owen had been having a regular correspondence with Mr. Rondal regarding the building of the structure. It should have been completed by the time Selena returned to Stonegate.
A quick look around showed Owen he was correct. The structure consisted of lumber and wrought iron with glass on all four sides and the roof. The bottom half of the walls were brick to give it adequate support. As he neared, Owen saw Selena through the windows, bent over the workbench. Besides having the greenhouse built, Owen had had it stocked with exotic fruits and flowers.
He paused at the door, his heart nearly bursting out of his chest. It was now or never. Owen took a deep breath before entering. The door did not creak on its new hinges, so Selena did not hear him enter. Not wanting to startle her too much, Owen stopped half-way.
“Hello, Selena.”
