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“That’s exactly it. We have each other to rely on, and with that, my courage to take on everything grows larger,” I answer, pushing myself up from the cozy haven of pillows to kiss Rhys lightly. “I love you. Thank you for being a rock for me.”
“I love you, too. I’m just returning the favour,” Rhys whispers, kissing me back. “I need to head to bed so I’m not a complete zombie in the morning. We have a new client coming in which means all hands on deck.”
I run my hand over his blonde beard and smile. “Okay. Good night, Rhys. Sleep well.”
“Good night, baby,” Rhys responds, kissing me one more time before standing up. “Riggs and Adam were just checking the windows and doors then coming to see you.”
“Awesome. Thanks, Rhys.”
“Don’t let Adam keep you up too late,” he jokingly scolds. I roll my eyes at him and throw myself back into the cushions, my smile growing bigger as he winks on his way out of the living room.
It’s only a minute or so later until Riggs and Adam walk into the living room, laughing together quietly. I watch them both unabashedly, their friendship with each other and Rhys is one of my favourite things to witness.
“Hey Beautiful, you look comfy.” Riggs steps over, moving into the same spot Rhys just left moments prior. “Are you tired?”
“I’m not overly tired. I’m more content than anything,” I explain on a deep exhale. “I had a really good night with all of you.”
Hudson grins from ear to ear, the sparkle in his deep blue eyes making my heart skip a beat. “I’m really glad you enjoyed yourself tonight. You deserve nights like this all the time.”
Adam sits on the couch beside me, laying his head back and closing his eyes. “Yeah, except soon we’ll have two kids who’ll make that a wee bit harder.”
Nodding my head, I turn from Adam back to Hudson. “He’s got a point. It won’t be as feasible soon.”
“The baby stage won’t last forever,” he replies with a shrug. “After they’re grown up a bit, Mom will take them so we can have date nights.”
“Man, they aren’t even born yet! Don’t rush them growing up,” Adam groans with a very un-Adam-like pout. “Time is going to move fast as it is, don’t rush our babies.”
Riggs sighs and rolls his eyes. “I wasn’t rushing them growing up! I just wanted to talk sweet to our girl about taking care of her and giving her lots of special nights. Why are you even butting in? Nobody asked you to be here and insert yourself.”
Adam sits up with a glare, his face stony and serious. Riggs’ words turned Adam’s asshole side on, apparently, which means things are about to get ugly. Considering that’s going to ruin my mood really fucking quickly, it’s about time for me to step in.
“Woah, boys. Calm down.” I sit up, placing myself between them. “It’s been a very nice evening, let’s try not to destroy it. There’s no reason either of you should be antagonizing the other. I know we’ve had a lot going on lately and tensions have been high for all of us, but you two keep escalating your normal bickering to things like this, and I’m over it.”
Hudson and Adam both deflate at my words. They both let out quiet apologies to me and each other, though the mood still doesn’t drop back to my nice moment of contentment. After Adam apologizes, he gets up with the excuse of heading to the kitchen to grab myself and him a drink.
I breathe out a sigh of relief and turn to Hudson, my mouth turned down in a small frown.
“What’s going on with you lately?” I ask softly, placing my arms over his shoulders and sliding down into his lap. “You’ve been going at it with Adam almost every chance you get. I thought it was maybe just normal friend teasing, but this is escalating. Are you unhappy in the relationship?”
Hudson wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly against him. He buries his face in my hair and lets out a shaky breath. We sit quietly like that for a bit, my heart racing and pounding in my chest with anxiety.
Is this the end of us?
I can’t handle that thought. Not when we just bought a house. Not when I’m pregnant with twins that I thought we would raise together. Waves of nausea come over me, getting worse with every second we sit here in silence.
“Please, say something,” I whisper, the rasp of unshed tears clear in my voice. “It’s okay if you can’t do this. I won’t be mad. I love you and I just want what’s best for you.”
“Oh, baby, no! I’m sorry, I got lost in my own thoughts,” Hudson quickly replies, taking my face in his hands so I’m looking directly in his eyes. “I want this. I want you. I even like the weird, unconventional relationship we have because it means the two people I trust most in the world, love and cherish you as well. This has nothing to do with our relationship at all. Fuck, it doesn’t even have anything to do with Adam.”
“Then what is it? Talk to me,” I beg, leaning in close to rest my forehead on his. “Let me weather the storm with you.”
“I guess it’s a lot of things all rolled together,” he starts, laying his head against my shoulder. “I’m angry about Kevin getting out. I’m scared he’s going to do something that I can’t protect you from. I’m scared he’s going to come after the babies the moment they’re born. And—”
“And?” I prompt softly, waiting for the last piece of the puzzle to fall in place.
“And I’m heartbroken. I’m so excited to be a father, but every time I think about my mom becoming a grandmother and Hayley being an aunt, my heart feels like it’s shattering because Hannah will never even get to meet them,” he whispers against me. A quiet sob comes from him, his warm tears dripping from his cheek onto my chest. “I want her to be here, too. I want the kids to grow up with the two best aunts they could ever have. I feel like life is cruel for taking Hannah and Declan away from us.”
“Hudson,” I speak, a few stray tears falling down my cheeks. “I am so sorry. I wish I could bring her back, bring both of them back, for us. Life can definitely be cruel to those left living. It’s the burden we bear for loving them and letting them live on in the memories we carry with us. It’s not an easy burden, but it’s worth it because while they can’t meet our children, our children can still meet them through us.”
