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Placing a hand over my heart, I curse in a whisper. “Shit, Rhys. You scared the hell out of me. Why are you lurking in dark hallways in the middle of the night?”
Rhys laughs quietly outside the door while I finish up. When I open the door, I fall right into his chest and hug him tightly. “I’m sorry I was lurking. I just got home from working that corporate event and heard you stumble into the bathroom. Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. I woke up from a bad nightmare about all of you and Kevin,” I murmur against his chest. “Adam and Hudson are both waiting for me. Wanna come join the after nightmare cuddle party?”
Rhys brushes his hand down my hair, smoothing it against the back of my head. “I’d love to. Let me just get out of this suit and I’ll meet you guys in the room. Want me to bring drinks or snacks?”
“Maybe just some water,” I mumble as I pull away from him.
“Water it is,” Rhys answers with a soft smile. “I’ll be there in a bit.”
“Okay.” I turn, placing my hand on the wall to find my way to the bedroom again without tripping. Rhys shuffles behind me for a moment then calls out my name quietly. Looking over my shoulder, I see just his silhouette in the dim light.
“It’s going to be okay. Kevin will be caught soon,” Rhys speaks softly, almost as if he’s afraid to jinx it. “We’re all going to make it through this.”
“I know we will,” I whisper back with much less conviction than the words imply.
The truth is I don’t actually know that we will. None of us do. That doesn’t change the fact that we all need to hear that reassurance just the same. The white lies we tell ourselves and each other to get from one day to the next are simply another survival tool we’re using to get through this. The fear surrounding us is enough to suffocate us if we don’t use these white lies to create pockets of hope, allowing ourselves to breathe even just for a little while.
Stepping back into the room with Adam and Hudson, I sigh deeply and walk over to them. They’re both waiting on the bed, half-asleep but smiling.
“Rhys just got home so he’s going to come join us,” I murmur quietly, the dark blanket of night always making me feel the need to whisper. “He needed to change and grab a snack first.”
“Oof. With how much they have him doing, he deserves a fucking promotion already,” Hudson grumbles, his eyes nothing more than slits with exhaustion.
“This new job is really working him to the bone," I respond, walking over to the bed to settle in. "I'm not sure I like it, especially with the twins coming in a couple months."
Adam rubs my leg as I attempt to gracefully climb over him into the bed. “Honestly, Rhys has always been a bit of a workaholic. As a cop, he was always taking extra shifts, working late, doing more than his share of the workload. It’s why Jarrod coasted by so fucking much. He used Rhys’ hero complex to make himself look good.”
Sighing, I lay back against a bunch of pillows and purse my lips. “I worry about him working this much. It’s not good for him.”
“It’s not. Rhys will listen to you, though, Lay. If you tell him you’re worried, he’ll pull back some.” Hudson kisses the top of my head and shifts further down the bed to try falling back asleep.
Nodding, I watch as Rhys walks into the room, my teal water bottle in his hand. He smiles sadly at me, sitting at the bottom of the bed and placing the water bottle up at my side.
“I’m sorry, Lay. I caught a bit of what was said and I’m sorry I’ve been working so much,” Rhys replies, taking my feet in his hands and lightly massaging them.
Chewing on my lip, I debate how much to truly let out what’s weighing on me. “It’s okay,” I murmur, rubbing a hand over my huge belly. “I’m just getting anxious with the babies due date coming closer, all this shit with Kevin, and the unknown aspects of it all. When you said you just got home, the worry and sadness of how much you’ve been gone as of late really hit me. I feel guilty even saying that, honestly.”
“I know I haven’t been around as much lately,” Rhys says, dropping his eyes to the comforter with regret. “I want so badly to provide for this family and keep it safe, I’ve been throwing myself into work to do just that. After I was put on suspension with the police force, I felt a little lost. Now that I’m working again, I’m struggling to find the balance that comes so easily to the other two.”
“It’s not easy,” Hudson mumbles into the pillow, not even bothering to open his eyes. “It takes effort, but it’s doable.”
Adam chuckles and shakes his head at Hudson. “What Sleepyhead is saying is that it’s not exactly easy to not get caught up in work and we all do it at one point or another. Even Lay goes overboard with work when she should be resting.” He gives me a pointed look and I shrug. “But we don’t get lost in it the way you do. You have this expectation sitting on your shoulders from your shitty ass family that makes you go beyond the normal losing track of time.”
Rhys blows out a heavy breath, his fingers mindlessly tracing designs on my legs. “You’re right. All of you are. With the babies due dates coming around the corner, I feel torn on where I belong in the family. What kind of support will be needed most from me? How can I protect the family? It’s on constant repeat in my head every day.”
“You’re needed to be present,” I explain, looking between all three of my men. They’re all intently staring at me, as if they’ve been needing the answers just as much as Rhys. “There are four working adults in this house. We just bought a brand new house, we have a generous savings nest, and we already have everything we need. Financial insecurity is not one of the things that we need to worry about. Even if one of you lost your job tomorrow, we would be more than okay.”
“More perks of our unconventional relationship,” Adam jokes, with a sly smile. “It’s like living with roommates except with sex and love in the mix.”
“Exactly.” I laugh and wince when I get a sudden tight cramp across my stomach. “Phew, the babies’ movement hurt sometimes.”
“Are you okay? Can I get you anything?” Rhys asks, suddenly up on his knees staring at me anxiously.
“I’m okay. Really,” I assure him. “The doctor said movement and braxton hicks may become painful as the babies get bigger and run out of room.”
Adam lays down and closes his eyes, a large yawn taking over his handsome, scruffy face. “Tell the babies it’s bedtime, no parties right now.”
