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“He wasn’t happy to see me. I thought it was water under the bridge, but I guess he is still pissed.”
“I know that you guys have been friends for a long time, but I don't think you know my brother like I do.”
I’d hoped that Lester would see that it was a good thing, that we were good for each other. I never thought that he would act this way. I could honestly say that I thought eventually he would get over it. After everything that's happened, all the time that's passed, it seemed silly to hold on to anger as tightly as he did.
“I just don't get it, I guess.”
“What is there not to get? I'm his little sister and you're his best friend. I think it's simple.”
Jeff nodded. “I guess you're right. I just thought that we were better friends than this.”
“He thinks that you're a player and that you're just going to hurt me,” I told him. That’s what Lester had said to me, though I think his reasoning was far different than that. I hadn’t argued, but I knew it wasn’t that simple.
“He doesn't know anything. I could never hurt you.”
“But you used to be a player?” I wondered out loud, finally looking up to Jeff to see his reaction. I hadn’t even asked, we hadn’t talked about it, but how much of what Lester said was true?
“You know how I was; I was good with the ladies.”
I pressed my lips together, not liking the reminder. I was about to answer him, probably something rude and cocky, but I cut it off when I saw my brother coming out of mom’s room.
“She's up.”
My heart felt a sense of relief that made me let out a long breath that I hadn't even realized that I was holding in. I’d felt off the whole day, but now she was awake, and I could finally start to relax. I had Jeff and I didn't want to hug my brother. Lester gave us both a dirty look and went to get something to drink. I didn't know why he took everything so personally. It didn't have to be this way. Why couldn’t he see that? It was obvious to me.
“She's going to be fine, Beatrice. I told you everything is going to be okay.”
About the time he said that we heard the machines going off in mom’s room and soon there were nurses and doctors rushing in from a code blue called over the intercom. It seemed like the whole hospital was in my mom's room. They had to save her, they just had to.
I was in shock; everything was supposed to work out. I didn't know what to say to Jeff. He was still holding me tightly and I was shaking. Nothing could happen to mom. I had so much that I wanted to say to her, so much that needed to be said, and I'd always been afraid to say. There had always been this friction between us that I'd hoped one day would melt away and a friendship could be born. I was too young to lose my mom. There was so much more that I needed to learn from her.
28
Jeff
It seemed like life just went from bad to worse. After I got out of the hospital, Beatrice was there all the time. I missed Beatrice because I didn’t get to see her, but obviously I understood why she was there. I missed her talks and the way she felt next to me. I was jealous, not getting any of the attention that I had before and never realizing how bright of a light Beatrice really was. When she was gone, my whole world was shadows and darkness.
I tried calling Beatrice several times and she was always too busy. She would answer, but then quickly got off the phone and at this point, I didn't know if she was busy or if there was something else going on. Beatrice was spending so much time at the hospital, she knew most of the doctors by name because of her time there before. I didn't like the way some checked her out whenever I was there visiting. I didn't know if I was right or paranoid or what was happening, but I felt like I was losing her. It felt like she was slipping right through my fingers, and I couldn’t get ahold of her.
She didn’t answer for the third time that I called, and I decided to go up to the hospital. She wasn't at work, I called to check. She was at the hospital when she wasn't answering her phone, even though the whole place had Wi-Fi.
The whole way there, which wasn't very far, I thought about what I was going to find when I got there. Beatrice told me that she had been staying there to make sure that her mom was well taken care of, but in the back of my mind, I just knew that there was something more going on. I had no idea what, no real proof. I couldn't pin down a reason why I felt the way I did, but it didn't change what I felt. I just felt like something was off. I was always a man that followed his gut and now I wanted to know where it led to. I hoped that it was a place that I could handle.
When I got to the hospital it was busy, but like Beatrice, I’d spent a lot of time here lately, so it felt different. The longer I stayed, the more familiar everything became, and it didn't have the same feel that it did before. Now I knew every nook and cranny of the place. It was going to come in handy in a few minutes when I couldn't find Beatrice. I searched the floor that her mom was on, saw several doctors that had flirted with her in the past, but there was one in particular that I was looking for. If I was honest with myself, I was there to see him, not Beatrice.
I was so sure that the two of them were together. I knew the doctor's name, Doctor Thompson, and I asked where he was. I got a couple of leads and went to check them out. When I finally found him, he was on the floor in a locker room. He was supposed to be sleeping, but by the sounds that were coming from the locker room, he wasn't sleeping at all. I had myself all worked up. I was going to open the door and I was going to see him with my Beatrice, and I was probably going to lose it and go to jail tonight. That's how I was feeling when I pushed the door open.
The doctor was standing up. He had somebody bent over, but the way the cubicle was and the position, I couldn't see who it was.
“What are you doing in here?!” he asked, not stopping.
I was appalled that he was still moving. “I think the question, doctor, is, what the hell are you doing in here. Who is that?”
I was so sure that it was Beatrice. I probably would have bet every dollar that I had, and I would have lost every single dollar in return. The brunette stood up and looked at me.
“I don't know you.”
She popped back out of view and the doctor was still inside of her. She looked like a nurse from the other floor, possibly the one I was on, and I apologized, but he knew who I was. This was going to get back to Beatrice. I was worried about that, so I went back down to where her mom was and went to see her. It would be easier for her to get the news that I was walking in on her mom's doctor with accusations. Maybe I could smooth it over somehow, get her out of the hospital so that I had at least one day to try to figure out a way to explain myself.
