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The words bubbled up against my lips, and I paused. Rayne knew Lucas really well. Was it okay to talk about him like this? Here?
“I won’t share anything you say with Lucas, Evelyn. Just like I wouldn’t share anything that he’s said with you.”
I took a shaky breath. “I’m afraid of Nathan killing him because it would be my fault. If I hadn’t come here, if I hadn’t... stayed, Nathan wouldn’t know that Lucas existed.” More words came crashing out, things that must have been lurking underneath. Things that I’d been pushing down. “I’m also worried that my feelings for Lucas are so strong only because he’s the first man that I’ve let in. After... everything.”
“But you do have feelings?”
There was no way to deny that. “I haven’t felt anything like this since Nathan. And that’s terrifying. I know Lucas isn’t like him. I know that. But still.”
“It’s easy to worry that history will repeat itself,” she said. “But you also deserve to be happy. This isn’t bound by confidentiality, so I can tell you that I’ve never seen Lucas look at someone the way he looks at you.”
That sent a little breath into my lungs.
“And furthermore, you are your own person. You know who you are and what you need. Trust that you’re doing what’s best for you. You have a lot of people around you now, myself included, that would tell you if things were headed in that direction. Right now they are not.”
I took a long, slow breath and listened to my heartbeat slow to a more normal rhythm.
“You covered a lot today,” she said gently. “And it’s going to feel that way. You might be a little raw for the next few days. That’s okay. It’s expected when you bring stuff like this to the surface. This is a process.”
I did feel lighter, and when we set our next appointment, something like hope lit up my chest. This felt like the first step toward letting everything go. I could never forget it. Not completely. My scars would never let me do that. But maybe I could let it fade into the past.
As soon as we caught Nathan.
We were closer. Yesterday there had been progress while I’d slept—though Lucas had been wrapped around me again by the time I had woken. Some location where he might be. Lucas had offered to tell me everything, and I’d said no. Only the basics. I didn’t want to think about him out there lurking. He already haunted my dreams enough.
Lucas was waiting outside. His eyes were everywhere, taking everything in. But his phone was also to his ear when I stepped out of the door. “Okay,” he said. “She’s here now. We’ll be back shortly.”
He ended the call then pulled me against his body, pressed me against the side of the building, and kissed me hard. Harder than he probably should have given that we were in plain sight, but the way his mouth opened mine, tongue teasing, I didn’t care.
“We got him,” he said, pulling back to press his forehead against mine.
The world tumbled from under my feet, and I was glad that I had him and the wall to keep me upright. “What?”
“We found him. An abandoned cabin about an hour from here. We’re going to get him. Tonight. It’s a done deal. All you have to do is stay at the house. Liam will be there, and Noah too.
It didn’t seem real. All I could do was stare at him. This was too easy, right? This couldn’t be happening. “How do you know?”
“We traced his phone—not easy, given the amount of protection he has—and the police chief had a few reports about lights. We checked him out last night and saw him through the windows. That’s where he’s holed up.”
My knees felt like water.
“You’re free,” he whispered in my ear. “As soon as I get back, you’re free.”
Lucas kissed me again, and I kissed him back. I couldn’t believe it—wouldn’t fully believe it until he was back and safe and they had Nathan. But this kernel of light in my chest was the start of something more hopeful than I’d felt in years. And that was dangerous.
I couldn’t stop touching him as we drove back to the ranch, and Lucas seemed to feel the same. He kept me curled against his side, driving with one hand on the wheel and the other around my waist. I was jumpier than normal with all of my emotions at the surface from speaking with Rayne and now the possibility of all this ending. Finally.
He knew. Lucas’s fingers kept moving in slow and soothing circles. Neither of us said much on the drive. He was focused on the task ahead, and just as I’d felt in Rayne’s office, I didn’t want to tempt fate by daring to speculate out loud more than we had to.
Freedom.
That word was an impossible thing reserved for other people. Not for me. It couldn’t be real. I couldn’t afford to believe it until it was.
It was all happening so fast.
Liam was already outside of the house when we pulled up, and he waved with a grin. “Ready for a fun night of waiting?”
“You bet,” I said, though nerves were starting to grow in my gut.
