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Blair’s eyes flick in my direction, and an uncomfortable tightness grips my chest.
Aunt Lottie tilts her head, pursing her lips. When she does that, she looks so much like Mom. “Any school will be lucky to have you, no matter what path you decide to pursue.”
A hollow laugh leaves me. Her hidden meaning is clear: you can do whatever you want, don’t listen to your parents. They’ve never approved of the way my parents push me to have a career in medicine. When Lucas came to them last year about his college dream, they were supportive. If I try to tell Mom and Dad I don’t want to study medicine, I get shut down.
“Yeah, as long as it’s part of the plan.” I put an emphasis on plan with a capital P.
Blair frowns, playing with the corner of the napkin in her lap, pinching the corner.
“Not everything goes according to plan,” Gemma says sincerely. “Do whatever you want to do, Dev.” Her gaze slides to Blair. “That goes for both of you.”
“Thanks.” I sigh. It’s easy for Gemma to say. Her parents are another perfect example of a loving, well-adjusted family. She wouldn’t understand the years of investment my parents have put into my college plans. “How’s Alec doing at University of Colorado in Denver?”
Gemma launches into a story about her twin brother. By the time she’s done, she yelps at the time on her phone. “Oh man, I’m sorry, guys. I promised my parents we’d split so we could stop by their house for dessert.”
“Oh! Here, take some extra sweet potato casserole for your dad. He’s been asking for the recipe.”
Aunt Lottie and Gemma get up to sort out their share of leftovers while Lucas shakes his dad’s hand.
“Um, I’m going to head out, too,” Blair says.
“What?” I lean my arm across the back of her chair. “I drove here.”
“Gemma offered to drop me off when they left.” She bounces her gaze between my eyes and sighs. “I want to go see my mom. We’ve never been apart for a holiday before. It feels wrong not to see her.”
The irrational, possessive jealousy rears up and then blinks out as fast as it came on. I drop my arm to her shoulder and pull her closer, kissing her cheek.
“Do you want me to take you?” It’s stupid, but I’m reluctant to let her leave my sight for long.
I’ve become so greedy the more time I’ve spent with Blair. Have I kept her from her mom by monopolizing her time? I’m a bastard. Her mom is important to her, I shouldn’t do anything to mess with that connection.
> Macy’s health has turned rocky with the cooler weather.
Blair puts her hand on my leg. “No, it’s okay. I’ll—” Her gaze flicks to my aunt and uncle. I sense she doesn’t want to admit to them she lives with me as she falters. “I’ll call you later.”
“Blair, it was a pleasure. Please come back soon, okay?” Uncle Ed gets up to hug her. She sends me a wide-eyed look. I hold back a smile. Uncle Ed is affectionate. “You’re welcome anytime. You and Devlin should come over next week.”
Aunt Lottie echoes his sentiments from the counter.
A few minutes later, I’m sitting alone at the table with my aunt and uncle after Lucas, Gemma, and Blair leave.
Uncle Ed and Aunt Lottie share a speaking glance. She smiles and reaches across the table to squeeze my hand.
“We really like her.”
“Yeah,” I agree, throat dry and scratchy.
I haven’t put a name to any of these feelings that spread through me, twisted with my insides like a living organism. Like doesn’t come close to what I feel when I’m around her. There’s no way to stop it from flourishing, no way to cut it out without killing my heart. I have to live with it, every bittersweet second as she pulls further away from me.
* * *
Sitting with them is easy and comfortable until it isn’t. The shift happens in a fraction of a second.
We’ve made our way through two different pies, laughing at a story about Lucas getting lost on the Oak Ridge College campus the first week of school.
All at once it’s too much to sit with Uncle Ed and Aunt Lottie. Even though they’re family, closer than my own parents, I’m still not their son.
Mom and Dad haven’t spent Thanksgiving or any other holiday with me in years, not since I was nine.
