Page 79 of Seeley


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Amaranta

Here’s the thing.

I never had anyone to take care of me.

I mean, aside from Seeley.

I was the caretaker.

I took care of my crummy mom who never took care of me. And when the state said I couldn’t do that anymore, I moved in with my grandma who was too unwell to take care of me herself. And, eventually, I had to become her caretaker too.

Then, in college, I was wholly alone in the world.

The same went for after college.

I always just… had to do for myself.

It didn’t matter how stressed or unwell I was, when I only had myself to lean on, I had to soldier on, I had to handle it all.

I honestly forgot what it felt like to have anyone give a damn. To have someone care enough to get you your favorite chocolates, or drive you home, or, God, make you a pot of coffee.

I simply… never had that.

So after one of the worst days of my entire life, feeling in pain and vulnerable and unsure of myself, to have someone not only offer, but to forcefully step in and take over and offer help? Yeah, it was a big deal for me.

Was it maybe an even bigger deal because it was Seeley? I mean, of course.

Because, at the end of the day, Seeley was the only person who ever had taken care of me. So there was just something extra special about him being around to do it again.

The thing with Seeley’s brand of caretaking, too, was he never made any of it seem like a burden of inconvenience. If anything, he was pissed off that I wouldn’t let him do more.

For someone who struggled in loosening their hold on the reins, having someone to just… take them out of your hands and more than adequately steer, yeah, it was a big deal.

He didn’t have to come, period.

When he got the call, he could have easily just ignored it, said the hospital was mistaken, that he was no longer a part of my life.

But that wasn’t Seeley’s style.

His loyalty was absolute.

I guess I figured that after the whole losing my v-card to him and him pretending like I no longer existed afterward was the end of that.

Clearly, though, it wasn’t.

I couldn’t begin to understand why he’d treated me like shit, but also gave me boatloads of cash each month, and came when he thought I was shot, and came when I was attacked.

But that part of me that had loved him since the day I met him, yeah, it was really glad he was around.

“I got your meds,” he told me as he kicked out of his shoes, then climbed into the bed with me.

Like old times.

Like we’d done countless times before.

Like there weren’t years full of bitterness and resentment and heartache between us.

“Thank you.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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