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I slip out of the back seat and walk the long way around the front of the car, glancing to the inside of Biff’s where Theo is standing behind Lily in line, his arms around her and chin over her shoulder like two people in love. My heart squeezes with envy, and I turn around to guard the entrance for several seconds, wishing for Brooklyn’s SUV to appear out of nowhere. The longer I stare with zero traffic passing, the stronger the visual in my head becomes of James walking along the dark roadway.
I pull my phone out and pull up his contact info. Swallowing my pride, I hit the call button and let it ring. When it goes right to voicemail, I do it again with the same result. Dialing a third time, I get into Theo’s car and shut the driver’s side door. I lay the phone in the passenger seat and wait for it to go to voicemail while I crank the engine and peel out of the Biff’s parking lot.
His voicemail beeps as the tires hit the main roadway.
“Hey, it’s me. Morgan. Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bit your head off like that. I’m just still pissed, and this thing with my dad is . . . I don’t know. Anyway, I really would like to talk. And I don’t want you walking here or home on a dark road so call me back so I can pick you up, okay? I’m heading that way now.”
I fumble for the phone and press the end call button at my side as I lean into the steering wheel to cut the window glare from the sparse streetlights and few passing cars. I scan both sides of the road while cruising along at a very slow thirty miles per hour. I earn four honks from various cars doubling my speed and probably wondering what the fuck is wrong with me, and I’m back at the school parking lot within ten minutes. James is nowhere in sight.
I shift into park at the school exit, everything at campus quiet. Baffled, I glance to my phone to see if I maybe missed his call. I pick it up and check my texts, but the only thing I have from James is his apology that I’ve basically ignored for four days.
I press the call button again and put it on speaker, setting my phone on my thigh and circling the parking lot to make sure I didn’t miss anything before doubling back on my route.
“Hey, so, it’s me again. I just drove back to the school, and I can’t find you. I’m a little worried. Call me.” I end my call and pick up speed, slowing only when I hit the roadway where I forced James out of the car. He was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt and Vans without socks underneath. Not exactly running attire, so I can’t imagine he got very far. I don’t pass any cars on this trip through, and before I get to the Biff’s turnoff, I flip around to drive the area one more time.
He's nowhere to be found. I pull off on a side road and send him a text in all caps.
CALL ME!!!
My pulse is racing and my stomach is a twisted stress knot as I weave in and out of back-countryside streets that lead to strange off-the-grid neighborhoods. I give up this quest after about ten minutes, my panic and mania hitting a soaring high. I pick up my phone before turning back onto the main road to race back to Biff’s, this time dialing Theo.
He picks up on the second ring.
“Hey, I can’t find him. I’m kind of freaking out.” My words rush out, and the sound of laughing and families eating burgers and having a good time in the background of his line only fuels my ire. “Did you hear me? Theo, I can’t find him!”
I pat the wheel with my nervous hands as I lay on the gas and speed up to seventy.
“Hold on, I’m stepping outside,” Theo says.
I shake my head and get ready to shout my panic, but before I can, Theo speaks.
“Morgan, it’s okay. He’s here. He got a ride with Brooklyn and Cam. You can come back.”
I punch the brake, fishtailing to a stop, burnt rubber smoke stinking up the air.
“You’re fucking kidding me!” I shout.
Theo chuckles, which amps me up more.
“Theo! I couldn’t find him. I was worried. I thought he got hit by a car or something or . . . I don’t know.”
I shift the car into drive, grinding the transmission as I do, which Theo must hear because he shouts, “Hey” into the phone.
“This is your fault! You told me to find him.”
He laughs harder.
“I’m sorry, but this has nothing to do with me. You kicked him out of the car. I only guided you to what you really wanted, which is to fix whatever the hell is going on between you two. I can’t help that you had visions of a six-foot-two man getting thrown into a pillowcase and held for ransom.”
“Shut up!” I retort.I did think that.
“I’m coming back,” I grumble, ending my call with Theo and pushing his car up to eighty. I get to Biff’s in minutes, most of the spots full now. I end up making my own by the dumpsters, and I fly out of his car and march toward the patio seating where I find Theo, Lily and James. I throw Theo’s keys at his chest, and they deflect off of him and land on the ground.
“Morgan, calm do—”
I shoot him a glare and point, daring him to finish that sentence. He holds up his palms and lets me stomp the rest of the way toward James, who is now standing and bracing himself for me. Undeterred, I press my palms into his chest and shove him back a step. I do it again, and again, hoping one of those times it will make me feel better.
“I went looking for you, asshole!” I shove him again, maybe feeling a little relief.
