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A sudden rush of images flash before my eyes. Mental snapshots of our past. Assumed depictions of our future. And it is so odd, the clarity of those pictures. Especially those yet to come. But I see it all.
Devlyn with our little one bundled in his arms. His eyes glassy with unshed tears as he stares down at them. And the way he holds my gaze when he looks up at me in pure awe. Delight. Brilliance.
Then the images flash forward to years from now. Devlyn and I swinging our mini between us as we walk down the beach along the surf. A sweet voice begging us to swing them higher. Soft giggles and shrieks of joy.
Tears spill down my cheeks without effort as my mind comes back to the present. The beautiful painting a blurry mess of reds and pinks as I swipe my cheeks and eyes. Devlyn catches the movement out of the corner of his eye and spins to face me.
“What’s wrong?” A whack fills the air as he drops the supplies from his hands and strides across the room. He cradles my face in his hands and brushes away the wetness with his thumbs. “Tell me. Please,” he whispers.
I lick my lips and swallow as I point a finger at the canvas. “This is the first time I’ve really seen the painting. It’s just…” My blues dart between his greens. “It’s so beautiful.” I shrug. “Guess it overwhelmed me.” I shake my head on a chuckle. “Damn hormones.”
Devlyn leans in, kissing each tear trail on my cheeks before pressing his lips to mine. The kiss is sweet and gentle, and ends far too soon.
“You’re beautiful.” His thumbs stroke my cheeks again. “The most beautiful creature I know.”
“For now,” I mutter as my eyes fall between us.
“Hey.” One hand drifts to my chin and tips it up so I look him in the eye. “No.” He shakes his head. “No, Shelly,” he repeats.
One of my creeping insecurities rises to the surface. Maybe because I am overwhelmed with seeing the painting. Maybe because there isn’t a lot of time of just me and Devlyn left. Whatever the reason, my secret spills from my lips with too much ease.
“When the baby comes, things will change.” My vision blurs for a new reason. “They’ll easily be more beautiful.”
“Not possible.” I open my mouth to rebut his words and he shakes his head. “Not. Possible.” He presses another kiss to my lips. “Yes, we will love this baby. So much.” His hand falls to my belly and rubs the outer swell. “But that won’t change how I love you. Ever.”
“You don’t know that,” I whisper-choke.
“I do.” Soft, warm lips press mine. “Shelly, I will never love anyone the way I love you. Will I love our baby with unmatched affection? Absolutely. But my love for them will be new. A love neither of us will understand until it hits.”
As his words sink in, as they resonate in my bones, I believe them more. The love for our child will be phenomenal. Otherworldly. Surreal. But loving them will be different than loving Devlyn.
I nod. “I love you.”
His fingers twirl a strand of my hair as he drops his forehead to mine. “Love you, Shell.” After another chaste kiss, Devlyn straightens to his full height. “Come.” He offers his hand. “Time to paint.”
The corners of my mouth tip up as I take his hand. “As you wish.”
Hours pass without care as I paint every line, curve and valley on Devlyn’s body. And he paints mine as if it is the most precious thing his hands have touched.
TWENTY-SIX
DEVLYN
Shelly shiftson the bed for the umpteenth time. I curl into her frame, my front to her back, and try to calm her.
But she isn’t sleeping.
Her hand takes mine and squeezes. Just as I open my mouth to ask if she is okay, her body tightens. Her breathing pauses a beat before she grunts softly.
“What’s wrong?” I whisper-ask and kiss her shoulder.
I feel her head shake in the dark. “Can’t get comfortable. And my stomach…”
When she doesn’t elaborate, I prop myself up on my elbow and look at her profile. “Your stomach what?”
“It’s just tight. Like painfully tight.”
Without a word, I whip the covers off my body and slip out of bed. Circling the bed, I stand in front of Shelly. “Close your eyes. I’m turning on the lamp.” I give her a moment, then flip the switch. We squint into the lit room until our eyes adjust. I hold out my hand. “Let’s try to walk a minute. See if that helps.”
