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I stare at Angelina in shock as she pirouettes around the room, obviously loving her outfit and it’s only when I peer closer that I see Sable wasn’t joking. Angelina is dressed like a mini femme fatale, and I wonder if the school will be impressed when she performs the can can at the birth of Christ.
Robert coughs and appears slightly disturbed. “We should leave.”
“But…” Sable makes to disagree, causing Robert to say sternly, “No mother. It was kind of you, but the children need their own home and to sleep in their own beds. It’s late and they have a busy day tomorrow, and so do we.”
I’m almost sorry for Sable whose earlier euphoria is squashed at his words and for some reason I want to make that right and say impulsively, “You must come to the nativity play tomorrow. It’s at St Jude’s, Worcester Park. Robert will text you the time.”
Sable’s eyes light up as the children cheer their support and she appears so grateful it makes me feel good about myself for once.
“I would love that.”
I really believe she means that too, because the gratitude in her eyes cannot be fabricated.
Robert interrupts with a low, “Come on kids, say thank you and we’ll get you home.”
The fact I have gained a family overnight makes this a complicated situation for my heart and as we lead two small children through the festively decorated house, I can almost picture my future. Despite what I thought I wanted, I’m fast realising it’s this, with Robert beside me sharing the responsibilities that life throws at you.
A gorgeous family; two children would be perfect. A beautiful home and no worries — ever. If I was given a choice, would I prefer to work or live like Sable and be a lady that lunches? The fact I’m even considering the choice tells me my world has spun on its axis and it’s all because of one man. Robert Harvey.
When I find ‘The Postman’ and I have no doubt I will, I’m not sure whether to arrest him or hug him because without those threatening Christmas cards, I wouldn’t be here now.
* * *
After thankingSable profusely and meaning every word, we head back to my sister’s house, trying to get over the fact David never even bothered to say goodbye. Apparently, he was going to bed and would catch up with us another time. I know Robert felt angry about that, but I was a little relieved if I’m honest and I wonder if I should ask Robert more about his childhood because I sense quite a story there.
However, we have two sleepy children to get to bed and I’m grateful for Robert’s assistance as we park in the driveway and then each carry a sleepy child up the stairs, making sure they clean their teeth before tucking them into bed.
As I smooth away the hair from Angelina’s forehead, she utters a contented sigh and, as I press a light kiss on her cheek, she whispers, “I love you, Auntie Jessie.”
I am so shocked it takes me a minute to form a reply and my voice shakes as I whisper, “I love you too, Angel.”
The glow from the nightlight illuminates my way to the door and as I catch a glimpse outside through the crack in the curtains, I swear I see snow falling. Then I remember Sable’s projector and I smile to myself. There is something so magical about snow falling silently on a dark Christmas night. For some reason, it wraps your soul in happiness and comfort and makes everything better. As I picture Sally enjoying a different kind of night than usual, my heart goes out to her and as I close the door softly, I make a vow that tomorrow I’ll do what I do best and get to the bottom of it, for everyone’s sake.
I make my way to Brad’s room and am astonished to see Robert perched on the end of his bed, reading what appears to be a Christmas story and for a moment I lean on the door frame, just content to watch the scene. Brad is battling to stay awake, and Robert makes me smile as he uses several accents for the characters and as he closes the book on the final page, he whispers, “Good night, Brad. You will totally rock that play tomorrow.”
He makes to leave, and Brad’s sleepy voice stops him as he says, “Will you come tomorrow, Robert?”
I think that time stands still as I find myself praying that he will, telling myself it’s for Brad’s sake, but really it’s purely for selfish reasons of my own. I’m surprised about that and once again a little of the ice melts in my heart when Robert says huskily, “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
Quickly, before he sees me, I step back and move silently down the stairs towards the kitchen because my heart can’t take much more of this. Everything has changed in the space of twenty-four hours, and I don’t know what on earth I’m going to about it.
CHAPTER26
ROBERT
The last thing I want to do is to leave them. However, now is the time I make my excuses and head home to my soulless mansion, where I’m happiest.
Today has confused that because this house filled with love and warmth is challenging my ideas of what I want in life.
From the moment I met Jessica’s niece and nephew, I was blown away. I haven’t mixed with children since I was one and turning up at their school and caring for them has opened a whole new world for me. I like it.
Then there’s Jessica. We appear to be the same person and I wonder about that. Is she experiencing similar emotions right now, or is this her worst nightmare with me in the starring role?
When I kissed her, I believed we were on the same page, but the fact she pulled back and shot me down made me doubt my own mind. When we returned to her sister’s house, it felt strangely like coming home and I envy them that. The house looks neat and well cared for and the tasteful decorations bring a sense of excitement to the home. Family life is so different from the one I was brought up with. This is how it should be. Love, happiness and chaos.
I head into the kitchen to find Jessica boiling the kettle and heaping coffee into two mugs and she says brightly, “Nightcap?”
Picturing my usual brandy before bed, I nod with a grateful, “Thanks, you’re a lifesaver.”
