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Chapter one
Lindsey
“Oh,that’sit,Donovan,right there.”
I hear my sister, Kasey, moaning her boyfriend’s name.Ugh. As much as I love her and I’m thrilled she found happiness, this is not how I enjoy waking up every morning when Donovan’s in town.
“Fuck yes, beautiful. Come for me.”
Sweet Jesus, do they have to be so vocal all the time?One thing you should never have to know about your sister—how much she likes dirty talk. A louder moan comes from both of them, then sweet silence. At least now I know it’s safe to get up and make coffee. No one needs a repeat of the time I got up before they finished, and their bedroom door didn’t latch properly. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to scrub the image of Kasey’s legs in the air while her boyfriend went to pound town between them. We were all mortified by the experience and could hardly look each other in the eye for days. They always make sure the door is closed and locked when they go to bed now, but I’m still scarred and keep my head down on the way to the kitchen, just in case.
Today is moving day for them. They’ll be going to Donovan’s swanky apartment, and I’ll be staying here. I know Kasey feels a little guilty about it, but it was my idea. Since my kidnapping, I’m not comfortable having people here I don’t know, and being that Donovan is running for senator of Pennsylvania, we had his staff in and out a little too much for my liking. One more issue on the list of things I’m still uncomfortable with. It can go right next to not being able to leave the apartment.
Kasey continues to battle guilt about my kidnapping. I see it in her eyes here and there, even though she tries to hide it. It certainly isn’t helping me. I have my own guilt to contend with. If it wasn’t for my goddamn stubbornness in getting a scoop on Jackson Hayes, Donovan’s brother, I wouldn’t have caught the attention of his crazy stalker and gotten myself abducted. That led to my sister being taken by the same psycho and Donovan getting shot during our rescue. Not to mention the doubts that my investigation into Jackson caused in their relationship. Donovan thought Kasey might’ve had something to do with the story, and Kasey thought Donovan might’ve had something to do with my disappearance. It was a mess they eventually worked out, but because I was keeping the story close to the vest and became so wrapped up in breaking the next big scandal, no one knew what I was up to.
That’s me, though. I have a hard time telling anyone what goes on in my head, always wanting to prove I can handle life and work on my own. It’s hard when your sister is an amazing reporter working for a prestigious paper and you’re still chasing stories to catch your big break. I would love to say I’m not the jealous type, but I’d be lying. There have definitely been times that the little green monster reared its ugly head. That’s probably why I didn’t share too many details about my investigation. I didn’t want Kasey to give me advice on how to go about anything, my own life included. Of course, it backfired spectacularly, and I was missing for about a week before anyone even knew.
Stubborn jealousy-1, Lindsey-0.
This is too much introspection first thing in the morning before coffee. I shake my head, trying to rid it of these nasty thoughts as I trudge into the kitchen and get the coffee going.
“Ah, sweet baby Jesus, I love the rule we have that the first one up makes coffee, especially when it isn’t me.”
Kasey comes hobbling into the kitchen, like the smell of coffee grounds has summoned her.
“Funny how it always seems to work in your favor,” I tell her and hit start on the machine.
“I guess I’m just lucky like that.”
She gives me her saccharine sweet smile. If I didn’t love her so much, I’d probably hate her right now. She looks so damn happy, with her sex tousled hair and a dreamy smile on her face. That part of life has never really worked out for me, and I have no prospects. I can’t even leave my apartment to meet anyone, let alone carry on a conversation with a stranger without breaking out in a cold sweat. It was never a problem before the kidnapping, but now everyone I meet screams danger to me. My apartment is safe. The outside world, not so much.
Kasey comes over to put an arm around my waist and kisses the side of my head. It’s the same motherly approach she’s always taken with me, especially since the incident. I love my sister, but I have a mom. She doesn’t need to act like one too, but that’s been the way of it since my dad died. Kasey had to pick up my broken pieces and help me carry them, along with my mom’s. She shouldn’t have needed to do that instead of going away to college and enjoying her first taste of freedom. Just another thing for me to carry guilt over. Man, the more I think about this stuff, the longer that damn list gets.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Kasey looks at me, concern etched in her features.
I don’t know how many times she’s asked me that question since suggesting she and Donovan move into his apartment. They’ve been here long enough, trying to fix my world. I appreciate it, but I don’t want her to feel like she always has to fix her little sister. Plus, all of us under one roof is getting tiresome. I don’t want my own space completely, though. I’m not ready to not havesomeonehere, but I need space from my sister. We all need some space. She needs to get on with her life with Donovan, and I need… I don’t know exactly what, but it’s not waking up to the sounds of my sister getting railed every morning, that’s for sure. If that sounds a little bitter, it’s probably because it is. One more thing to work on with my therapist.
“Kasey, I’m completely sure. You guys need your own space. We’ve talked to my therapist about this, and it’s not like you’re leaving me here alone. I’ll have Aiden here with me and you two will have your own space. Everyone wins.”
I squeeze her back, trying to show her I’m perfectly fine with this move. She’ll cancel it altogether if she gets any hint to the contrary.
“Yeah, I can’t help but ask, even though it’s the four hundred fifty-seventh time.”
She gives me a smile before turning to the cupboard to pull down a couple mugs for us.
“It was perfect timing for Aiden to move in here,” she says.
Aiden’s the real reason we’re all okay with her and Donovan moving out. Donovan’s security specialist needed to find a new apartment, and I needed someone here so I’m not diving into panic attacks every time a car drives by after dark. Aiden was the one who set me free from Helen’s basement and stayed with me until the ambulance arrived. He’s the one who stayed at the hospital outside my room while I was recovering. He would check in on us regularly when we got home from the hospital, even after Donovan called him off. If there is anyone I trust with my safety and sanity other than my sister, it’s him.
“It’ll be great,” I tell her. “This way, I don’t have to wear earplugs to bed every time Donovan is over.”
Her face burns red with embarrassment, and she gives me a mortified look just as Donovan walks into the kitchen.
“Morning, Lindsey,” he says to me.
Donovan puts an arm around my sister with a confused look. She still looks like a fish out of water, her mouth opening and closing. It’s hilarious.
“Beautiful, what’s wrong?” Donovan looks between me and Kasey trying to figure out what the hell is going on.
