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He meets me on my side of the car, closes my door for me, and escorts me up the still-icy steps of my sister’s house. I’m back in my outfit from the club, including the heels that are especially dangerous in this weather. As we reach the door, Holden grabs me and pulls me to him. His hands rub up and down my back as he kisses me. It’s a goodbye kiss and it’s ripping my heart out.
The all-too-brief kiss ends, and I remove the coat he gave me, handing it back before turning and heading into the house. I open the door, turning to look at him, a silent offer to come inside. Holden just shakes his head, “I think I should go.” He pauses, almost hesitating before he sighs. “Goodbye Everly.” I don’t even get a chance to respond, as he turns around and heads back to his car, never once looking back at me before he makes his way down the gravel driveway.
I watch him leave, all the while my heart ripping in my chest. Silent tears slide down my cheeks as I watch him turn onto the main road. I don’t know what I was expecting, for Holden to turn around and come back for me, demanding I come with him, never wanting to be parted from me? This was never meant to be forever.
That’s how Mel finds me, standing in the open doorway, staring down the driveway to the empty road beyond, tears silently streaming down my face.
“Oh honey,” Mel squeaks out, wrapping me in a tight hug.
***
Christmas comes and goes. My parents and Tanner video-chatted with us from their cruise, everyone was tan and all smiles. My parents are eating up the warm weather and don’t for one-second miss the frigid cold of Chicago winters.
Mel and I keep up with our favorite holiday traditions: we watch the 24-hour marathon of “A Christmas Story” and drink spiced wine while lounging in our PJs all day. We make a batch of our favorite cinnamon crackle cookies and travel onto Main Street to ‘ooh and aww’ over the Christmas lights strung up from the buildings.
It’s been 3 days since Holden dropped me off. Mel is doing her best to cheer me up, but I don’t think anything could pull me out of the gut-wrenching twist in my stomach at knowing he’s gone. I know it’s ridiculous, these feelings I have for a man I spent less than 48 hours with, but logic isn’t meshing with my emotions. My heart is screaming ‘He is mine! We belong together.' It didn’t matter that we just met, it was like our souls were destined to find each other. The thought of not being with him pulls the breath from my lungs.
I’m supposed to leave for home today, but I can’t bring myself to go. I don’t want to leave the city. I don’t want to go even farther away from him, even though I know he is probably back in New York by now. Mel convinces me to stay with her until New Year’s, saying that I will keep her company since Kyle won’t be back yet. I feel pathetic but decide to stay anyway. I can wait a couple more days before I head home.
Chapter 10
Holden
It’s the day before New Year’s Eve and I find myself back at the office. My body is here, but my mind is on Everly, hundreds of miles away.
I’ve wanted to reach out to her, but something stops me. I don’t want to put both of us through more pain. It was a wonderful couple days with her, but it had to end at some point.
“Sir,” Alyssa’s feminine voice pipes through the speaker system, “Mr. Pike is here to see you.” Of course, Ryan is working too. We officially put in the offer to purchase Club Climax, and Ryan has been dealing with the acquisition and contracts to finalize the deal.
“Send him in,” I bark, more forcefully than I mean it to be. I scrub my hands through my hair, trying to rid my mind of the memory of Everly’s touch.
Ryan comes barreling into my office, plopping down on the chair in front of me and propping his feet up on my desk. “I knew I’d find you here. You’ve been working even more than normal. Something going on?” Ryan has a slight look of concern as he lounges before me.
I push his feet off my desk, annoyed. “Get your fucking shoes off my desk asshole. And no, nothing is going on,” I spit out, but I can tell he isn't convinced.
“Alright, alright,” he holds his hands up in surrender. “Geez, you are wound up. Do we need another night out? You know all the chicks will be out in droves tomorrow, we could snare us some beauties to take care of whatever it is that is eating at you.”
“Shut the fuck up Ryan,” I practically yell. The only beauty I want is Everly and she’s not here. She’s gone.
The world starts to spin, my chest heaving trying to take a breath that isn’t coming as the panic attack slams through me. She’s not here. Everly isn’t here. She’s gone. You left her. Thoughts of her playing on a loop in my mind as the panic settles in. My head drops to my desk as I try to gulp air into my lungs, my chest stuck in a vice. Ryan is up in an instant, coming to my side trying to calm me down, but it’s not working. Everly’s face is the only thing I see.
Everly is the last thing I see before the world goes black.
***
Everly
Mel and I are lounging in her living room, shoving pizza bagels and champagne down our throats. She is missing Kyle and I am missing Holden. So, we are drinking.
We started with mimosas this morning, working through a bottle of wine this afternoon, then moving straight to the champagne as the New Year’s Eve festivities begin in New York City.
A pang of sadness hits my chest as I take in the view of the city. Holden is there, in that city, probably among the throng of people in Times Square, or in a fancy club or restaurant to bring in the New Year.
I gulp down the rest of my champagne and pour yet another glass. We’ve gone through almost 2 bottles of champagne today and it’s only ten. We attempted to decorate for the New Year, black and gold streamers hang from the ceiling, and we are wearing those cheap plastic glasses with the new year on our faces. We are such party people.
We watch the craziness unfold as the hosts, who have clearly had too much to drink or downed some pills, make fools of themselves on national television. “I wonder if the new girl will try to blow Anderson Cooper like that one chick did,” Mel muses.
“Ha,” I snort, “maybe. At least this chick seems more put together. She doesn’t have that ‘I’m crazy’ look to her at least.” I take another swig of my drink and shove a pizza bagel into my mouth. We’ve created a snack spread on the coffee table: pizza bagels, chips and salsa, peanut butter m&m’s, and a wide assortment of any kind of finger food you can imagine. The lady at the register at the store asked us if we were throwing a party, neither one of us wanting to admit that all this was for the two of us.
