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“Sweet dreams, angel,” he whispered as he closed my door.
I walked back to my bedroom and fell back on the bed with a frustrated sigh because I got the feeling that the next six months were going to get complicated and messy. Neither of which I was good at dealing with.
Tanner
Itwasonlybreakfasttime, and I’d jerked off three times already this morning. My cock ached, but I couldn’t shake off the need and desire that pumped through my body like blood. I knew Emmy was doing something to me, but when she admitted she’d woken up screaming from a dream, she’d had about me, my body couldn’t cope with the onslaught of feelings. This was where drink and drugs were helpful. Self-regulating what was going on in my head.Now, what was I supposed to do?Become some sort of sexual deviant who had extraordinarily long showers so they can fist themselves some relief. It was worse because I didn’t knowwhatshe’d dreamed, so my imagination was having a field day, concocting detailed images and possible scenarios that kept making me hard.
I knocked on her door early this morning to make sure she didn’t feel awkward or embarrassed, but she wasn’t there. I panicked she’d run again, but Addi reassured me that she’d gone out with Matt, so I sat and ate breakfast with Frankie and the boys, while we ribbed Mav for the huge hickey he had on his neck. It was nice. Relaxed, friendly, easy. It had been such a long time since being with them felt like this.
About 2.30 pm we left in the cars to the venue, Addi promising me that Emmy would be there before the gig tonight, but she wanted to stay at the hotel and make a start on writing up some of the notes she’d made on our trip so far. I was surprised. We’d hardly told her anything, but I guessed she saw and heard our secrets in everything we did.Shit, she’s probably got a ton of dirt on us already, without us even realizing.
We ran the soundcheck, agreeing on the running order and making sure the stage was set up properly before I headed to the green room while the others went off to do their own thing. A smile spread across my face as I thought about Emmy last night; flushed, innocent, stunningly beautiful and dreaming about me… doing what? Fucking her, fingering her, on my knees, sinking my tongue into her? And what had caused her to scream out so loudly that it woke Gray? My cock twitched again, my body longing to be near her. There were only a couple of hours until the gig, so I knew she wouldn’t be long, but I was desperate to speak to her, to hear her voice. Something. Anything that gave me a fix of her.
I pulled out my phone to talk to her and noticed a message from an unknown number, which was weird because there were only about ten people with my details and I didn’t give it out to anyone. I clicked to open it.
Unknown: Having fun in Paris with your new girlfriend? I want a million or I will blow up your whole life.
Fuming, I went to delete it, when another message appeared. When I opened the image, I saw her. Emmy. It was a grainy shot of us together when I had her wrapped around my waist. You couldn’t tell it was me or any other members of the band and while you could see Emmy’s pink hair, her face was pressed into my neck, so she remained hidden, but the fact my evil mother was trying to blackmail me again sent me off the rails.
Overcome with an onslaught of emotion, I slammed my fist into the wall. My knuckles split as the plaster cracked, and I cried out in pain. Rob, my bodyguard, and Addi appeared in the doorway, both looking around the room, confused. Unable to speak. I threw my phone at Addi and started pacing. Reading the message, she showed it to Rob, who pulled his from his pocket to make some calls. Addi pointed for him to leave the room.
“You’re mum, I presume?”
“What do you fucking think?” I fired back, unable to have any patience right now.
“Right, I will give Lori and Phil a call and get the police on it. Can I borrow your phone for a few minutes while I get the number and forward the photo?”
I nodded.
“We’ll up security and you can’t tell it’s Emmy from this shot, so we don’t need to worry about her being a target. Now that we know your mum has someone tailing you, we can be one step ahead of her. But this won’t help, Tan. You can’t lose control because of her madness.”
She took my swollen, bleeding hand in hers and examined it. “Rob?” she called, and he bent his head through the doorway. “Can you get me a first aid kit, please? Thanks.”
I tugged my hand away from her. “I’m fine. I just need… fuck, I need a drink, Addi.” Saying that out loud felt like such a relief. My desire to drink had been growing daily, and I’d struggled to keep to my promise to stay sober. “It’s been weeks. I’ve shown you I can do this. I won’t go overboard, but you can’t expect me to go out there like this. I’ll be shit. When I’m this wound up, I can't perform.”
Addi started pacing in front of me, her face pinched in anger. “No fucking way, Tanner. Even if you’re playing in a foul mood, it won’t be as bad as when you were off your face. I’m not letting you give up now. You’ve come too far. It’s like we’ve got the old you back. Don’t do this,” she begged, sounding almost desperate. “Let me find you somewhere to swim, a gym, let me phone Levi. Just don’t go back there, please. I don’t think anyone would forgive you if you did. Is that what you want?”
“What I want is to get fucking drunk and forget that my mother is a blackmailing piece of shit.” I spat out, hating my mum for what she was doing, but also hating Addi for not letting me drink to silence the monsters in my head.
“Funny thing is, if she’d stuck around, I would have given her every penny. Every fucking penny. I just need to switch off for a while. To numb it all. Why can’t you see what this is doing to me?” Running my fingers through my hair, I stared at Addi, hoping she could see the pain on my face and sense how much I needed this release.
Turning to me, her face softened. “Tanner, I can see. I’ve seen it for years, but a drink won’t solve anything, and it won’t ever be just one drink with you.”
“Fuck this, Addi. You can’t stop me.” I hated how constrained I felt right now. By her, by the band, and by my life in general. Right now I wanted to blow it all up, and I didn’t care who got injured along the way. "I’m going for a walk. Rob, you’re with me.”
“Rob’s not going anywhere, Tan, and neither are you,” Addi yelled back at me, her hands on her hips, refusing to listen to any of my shit. “You are not going AWOL ninety minutes before a gig. Stop being a prick and calm down. Let’s find another way to help you. You get drunk and we’re done. You know that. Me, the band. Everyone.”
“It’s emotional blackmail, and you know it, Addison. You wouldn’t leave because we pay you too fucking much. I just need—” I heard the door to the room open and Emmy walked in, silencing my tirade.
My eyes raked up her body as I took her in. Black ankle boots with a slight heel. Black leather, wet-look leggings showing off her long, toned legs. An oversized sleeveless white silk top, tucked in at the waist. Large enough that it didn’t show off her figure in a revealing way, but it skimmed her in all the right places. A black choker wrapped around her neck, and brown leather bracelets adorned her wrists. Dark smoky eyes, bubblegum pink lips, and her hair plaited into another intricate braid that hung over her shoulder. She looked so stunning that it physically knocked the anger from my body.
“What’s all the shouting for, rock star? I leave you for a few hours and you go allhulkon me again. Talk to me, Tanner.”
Chapter 13
Emmy
IsmiledasIgreeted the crew and security while I headed backstage. Matt was right next to me, so I knew I was safe. I loved that Tanner gave me that. I was making a mental note to thank him when I heard shouting coming from the green room. It sounded like a very, very angry Tanner and an equally annoyed Addison.
