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“I hit a mom,” she continued. Her voice had gone almost deathly silent as she spoke. Her eyes had glazed over. I wondered if she was still with me or if she’d gone back to that tragic night. “There were twin girls in the back seat. When I came to, Zane was at the hospital. My mother was too, but my father…he was nowhere to be found. I cried so hard that night. I prayed every single second for those girls to make it through. I prayed for their mom as well. I didn’t want their blood on my hands.”
“Did they make it?” I asked.
She nodded and wiped a tear from beneath her eyes. “But one of the girls…she was permanently paralyzed from the neck down.” She swallowed. “She was only six, Marshall. Six years old and cursed by a budding doctor who didn’t know how to handle stress.”
“There was nothing that you could’ve done,” I told her.
“Yes, there was. I didn’t have to get in my car and drive at all that night. I could’ve stayed in my dorm and studied so I could pass that test. I could’ve gotten a therapist to deal with my issues the right way—I…I could’ve listened when everybody else told me I had a problem and I needed to get help. I could’ve gone to rehab sooner. I—” She sobbed, cutting off her words.
I held her tighter to my body then. “It’s okay,” I said over and over.
Through her sobs and tears and everything between. I held her. Just as much as she held me.
Chapter Five
Trisha
Marshall stuck by me through the worst of my crying, which I had to commend him for because there was a lot. I’d still been pretty raw when talking about what I did that night. It was never pretty to talk about things like that, I knew that much. It never made it any easier though.
For the most part, I was glad I told him so there weren’t any more huge secrets on my part, but I wondered if he could honestly say the same.
We were attached to each other for the better part of the night. At some point, we decided that we might as well start snacking before our stomachs got the better of us. But during that phase, I realized Marshall was unusually quiet.
“Are you okay?” I asked, not really wanting to know the answer. It wasn’t easy for people to learn the monstrous act I’d committed and then see me in the same light. I hadn’t even expected him to be able to do that. Though, it didn’t stop me from hoping he wouldn’t change his view of me.
He nodded and popped a candy in his mouth without looking at me. “I’m fine.”
“You’re not,” I told him.
He breathed in and exhaled harshly. “You once asked me where we are supposed to take what we had from here,” he said and I nodded. “What am I supposed to do, Trish?” He shrugged. “You’re leaving again and I’m still going to be right here in Cedar Cove. What are we doing?”
“What do you mean what are we doing?” I furrowed my brows.
He turned to face me. “We can’t do long distance and you can’t promise me you’ll remain single and wait for me once you go back.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means I don’t want another man touching you when you leave—”
“Well, I don’t want that either but—”
He looked up at the sky then back down at me, fueling the rage in my blood.
“Oh, you’re one to talk about waiting for people,” I said. “Aren’t you the same person who has a history of sleeping around with almost every girl in town?”
“It meant nothing to me.”
“Oh? And I’m supposed to believe that, right?”
“Yes!”
“Why?!”
His chest was heaving up and down. “If you’re going back to someone—if you want to live your life, just let me know. We can end this here and I won’t hate it. I won’t hate you.”
“What are you talking about?” I went up on my knees and held his face in both my palms. “Marshall, there is nobody else for me but you. I swear it.”
His eyes swam with emotion. It was like he wanted to believe me, he really did. But, for whatever reasons, he didn’t. He held on to my hand and massaged it. Then just shook his head.
