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"You walked into my fucking house, and my dad forgot I even existed. You were like a prodigy he had to see through. He hated that I didn't choose the life you did. When he found out you were accepted at the academy, he was blown away, and I hated that. Not you."
He throws his hands up, aggravated, "You think I didn't know about his trips to Colorado? Or when he came to see you when you got your wings?"
I look down, suddenly realizing how he must feel. I left his daughter pregnant, was basically a fuck up and he still cared about me. "Your dad was a good man. He talked about you the few times I saw him, how proud he was that you could run the winery by yourself. He talked about what a great head for business you had and all the great things you'd done at the vineyard. Truthfully I wasn't even considering the Air Force until I met him. He talked about the brotherhood, the family. Back then, that's all I craved. To feel like I belonged."
"You didn't think you belonged with my sister?"
I don't respond. It's her fucking wedding day. She's is about to marry someone else, for christ's sake.
"This is so fucked up," he laughs, "So you just gonna let the opportunity to get the girl pass you by?"
"The ball is in her court now, Adam. I want her to be happy."
"Damn, you really do love her."
"Yeah, and I can't watch this, so I'm gonna jet."
He nods, turning to walk away. "Jay, for the record. I love a good plot twist. I'm rooting for you."
I slip into the driver's seat. In shock from what just happened, I stare out the windshield. My hands rubbing through my hair, thinking of what could've been. If anything I could've said to her that would've changed this, that would've taken her pain away. Anything at all I could've done.
I made my own bed, and she carefully tucked me in. Now I'm left to suffocate in the sheets of my mistakes.
I turn the key, listening to the Diesel engine fire up, ready to escape my very own version of hell. As fast as I can.
I should probably go home and change out of this ridiculous suit, but instead, I drive. I feel the urge to jump in a plane and get as high as possible or jump out of one. Anything to feel something other than this ache in my chest. Instead, I end up exactly where I always used to. Sitting outside this eight-foot fence, staring up at the three strands of barbed wire that sag just enough for someone to get over.
I snuck over this fence so many times that I ended up making friends with security. So technically, I don't need to climb it but call it nostalgia because tonight, that's exactly what I'm going to do.
The sun hasn't set quite yet, but that doesn't stop it from painting the most beautiful orange and pink sunset across the sky. One that I wish I could show Hanna and Ellie from above the clouds. I jump down on the other side of the fence, laughing at myself when I look down at my slacks and button-up shirt.
I'm a mess.
Dojo and Cuddy are at the bar, sending me back-to-back text messages, telling me to bail on the wedding and how fucked up it is that I even went.
They don't understand because they've never had a Hanna. They don't know what we've been through or what I just lost. Trust me when I say it's nothing a night at the bar is gonna be able to fix.
I plop down in the thick grass that needs to be mowed, pulling my knees up and resting my elbows on them. They don't fly much out of this airport, so I don't see a single plane on the runway.
My phone keeps vibrating in my pocket, but I ignore it, not wanting to read any more text messages from the guys. I let out an aggravated growl, throwing myself backward until I'm lying on the ground looking up at the sky, which is getting darker.
I don't know how long I've been lying here, but the stars are beginning to appear in the sky. It's away from the city, so they're a little brighter out here. A lot like they were the night Hanna and I stared up at them on her parents' farm.
"So I was wondering if I could maybe have that dance?"
My head jerks to the right at the sound of her voice, my eyes falling to the most beautiful sight.
"Hanna?" I sit up, thinking I might be hallucinating, "What the… Am I dreaming?"
She rocks back onto her heels, "I'm real."
"How? I mean, what about the wedding?"
She shrugs, "Turns out I didn't have the right groom."
I stand there completely dumbfounded as she continues, "Jay, the wedding is off."
