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“And games. Alec, you hate games and yet you played with us.”
“I know.”
“You did all that because you were happy, and then something happened that evening, because overnight, everything changed. I thought it was very sad to see the two of you at odds when you were once—” He broke off, shook his head. “Don’t make me repeat myself.”
“Happy,” Alec said under his breath.
Frederick heard though, and he nodded. “Exactly so.”
“She’s not English, Uncle Frederick. She knows nothing of our history, and nothing of our culture and customs. My father—”
“Doesn’t even know who he is. But if he was himself, and you introduced him to Cara, he’d like her. How could he not?”
“He hated that Madeleine was half French. Cara is full—” He broke off. “You know.”
“American, yes, but as lovely and charming as any woman I’ve ever met. She’d love you and give you children, and she’d love them, too. You had a tremendous education, Alec. You’ve been to the best schools, have worked with influential people, but has it fulfilled you? Are you joyful? Do you feel blessed? Grateful? No. For goodness’ sake, do something that will make you happy. Don’t marry to impress others, and don’t marry for prestige. Marry for love. That’s my advice for you.”
Alec looked up from his tea. “If I was your son, what would you tell me?”
“Alec, if you were my son, I’d try to steal her from you. She’d make a great Sherbourne, wouldn’t she?”
Alec stared at his great uncle and then laughed. He laughed hard, his eyes watered, and still smiling, he hugged his uncle hard, and felt some of his anguish ease.
Chapter Sixteen
She would makea great Sherbourne. She’d make any man a great wife. But he didn’t want any man to have her. He wanted her. Cara washis.
Twice he picked up the phone to call her, and twice he’d hung up before placing the call.
Irritable, and restless, Alec returned to London Thursday morning, but back in his flat, sleep still evaded him. He spent two long nights just lying there, thinking.
He didn’t even bother going to the office. The staff was still on holiday, and there was no point going to work if he wouldn’t work, and he knew himself well enough to know that without sleep, he was worthless.
He hated being at Langley after Cara left because the house felt enormous, empty, and cold.
His London flat was no better. She’d never been here, but he could see her, in his mind, see her smiling at him as he watched the news, could hear her laugh as he ate dinner.
The difference between life with Cara and life without her was so extreme; it was all he could think about. Normally, he could distract himself, prioritize issues, focus on what was important, and the fact that he couldn’t put her from his mind meant she was the thing that was important. She was the priority. She was… everything.
Alec wasn’t impulsive. He didn’t do rash things. He didn’t chase after women or business deals. He rarely chased anything. But he wasn’t going to lose Cara, not without putting up a fight. He wasn’t rushing to Seattle to propose—it was way too soonfor that—but he was rushing there to tell her how important she was. Rushing to reassure her that he’d been wrong, that he hadn’t understood how things were. That he hadn’t understood himself.
Because he was serious about her. She mattered, and her happiness mattered, and if he could make her happy, well, that was everything, wasn’t it?
Alec didn’t know why she was the one he wanted; only that she was the one he couldn’t lose. She was the one he didn’t want to let go… or forget. Having lost Madeleine, he knew his heart, knew what he needed, and knew what was important, which was why he bought a business-class ticket on British Airways from Heathrow to Seattle for the very next day. There was no time to waste. He was willing to take a huge risk if it meant securing the future, a happy future.
Alec could see her in his future, too. Maybe initially it had been hard to picture her in London, but that was because they’d never been to London together. However, just as Cara had made Langley Park feel like home, he was certain she’d make the London flat feel like home. Not because she was this old-fashioned homemaker, but because she’d be there, and if she was there, he’d want to be there.
That was really the whole issue, wasn’t it? Alec just wanted to be where she was. He wanted her company. He wanted her smile, her laugh, her chatty cheerful conversation. He liked the way she looked at the world. He liked how she tried so hard to be positive. He liked her close. He wanted her in his arms, where he could touch her, kiss her, feel her warmth. He wanted to put his arm around her and bring her against his chest. He wanted to hold her hand as they walked. He wanted her breathless laugh after they kissed. He wanted her optimism and hopefulness because she had this extraordinary ability to make everything seem fresh and bright.
But most of all, he wanted her to know how important she was, just the way she was.
She didn’t have to change for him, not for anyone. No one was perfect, and yet she was perfect for him.
It was a nine-hour nonstop flight to Seattle, and then after customs, a quick commuter flight to Bellingham from SeaTac. He’d lined up a car and driver for the day, along with a hotel room. The driver was waiting for him at Bellingham’s baggage claim with a sign readingSHERBOURNE.
Alec gave the address for Cara’s apartment to the driver and settled back, watching the rain splatter the windshield. It was cold and wet, but not cold enough for snow. He was glad. He’d had enough of snow for the time being.
It took only fifteen minutes to reach Cara’s apartment, which was a few blocks away from Western University. The entrance to the apartment was outside but her apartment was dark, and when he knocked, there was no answer. A small red and green polka-dot gift bag sat on the doormat, the green tissue damp.
