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Myfistsgripthe steering wheel of my truck as the rain pours. It’s one of the few days we actually receive rain, and of course it’s after I’ve broken her heart. A day when I need to feel the open air as I ride my bike on the freeway before work.
Riding in the open air has always soothed my anger, my anxiety, and my depression. Being stuck in this truck is truly one of the worst feelings right now.
I texted Levins to let him know I would be picking him up on the way to work, so that we could carpool. He is waiting outside the house for me when I pull up, a smug grin on his face. And I realize that I have royally screwed him up.
When he joined the team, he was dating a girl who was kind and sweet. She drank a little too much, but he loved her. Then he saw my warped attitude towards women, and how, despite being older, I always pulled good-looking women without a single monogamous bone in my body.
He didn’t know it was because my heart belonged to someone I couldn’t have, and he dumped the poor girl. Left her in a taxi to go home, and since then he hasn’t fucked the same girl more than two or three times. So, seeing me tied to Andi is hilarious to him.
He climbs into the passenger seat and tosses his duffel bag into the back seat. “You in the dog house buddy?”
I scoff. “Something like that.”
“What did you do?” He wipes the grin off his face when he realizes that I’m upset.
“I really messed things up, is what I did.”
“She’ll take you back, bro. Just gotta apologize.” He rests his hand on my shoulder as I pull out of the driveway.
I grumble as I drive us to the station. “I can only mess up so much.”
Levins tries to cheer me up during the ride, but it doesn’t work. I’m like a zombie, just going through the motions. Somehow, I’m able to sit through our shift meeting.
My stomach feels heavy, and anxiety rises when I think of her. Andi meant it when she said she wouldn’t take me back again, but I still left her. I doubted her ability to take care of Matthew herself. I believed her when she told me it was over if I left, and I still left.
The team meets at the front of the police building as we wait for Sarge to load up. Dad’s car pulls into the parking lot, and I heave a sigh. Milo notices and nudges my side with his elbow. “What’s your old man doing here, Black?”
“Who knows?” I turn away.
“Son?” His voice comes from behind me, and I huff loudly and turn around. “I know you’re busy, but when you’re back, I’d like to sit down and talk.”
“Do you mean apologize?” I ask, my tone short.
“I mean talk. Sort things out.”
“It’s simple, Dad. You say, ‘I’m sorry, Dominic, for lying to you. I am sorry that I caused Andi so much unnecessary pain. I am sorry for being a selfish prick.”
“Your mother misses you. How long will you make her suffer?”
“It depends on how long it takes to get a sincere apology from both of you. If you’re not here to apologize, then I have nothing left to say, and I have work to do.”
I brush past him and climb into the driver’s seat. I start up the engine, so we can leave. Sarge appears, ready to roll, and the team loads up, and I catch Dad in the mirror, heading inside, despite the warning I’ve given him.
I've been off all morning. Cory's been trying to get me to vent, get it off me chest, but I just brush him off. Dad showing up to confront me only adds fuel to the fire.
Usually, my personal life never impedes work. I once had a woman burn all of my clothes on my front lawn, and came into work with a smile on my face, unfazed by the crazy I let into my home. This was different. What happened with Andi has crawled under my skin, and I can’t shake the bad mood.
As I step out of our tactical tank, we all get ready to storm the warehouse. Sarge leads the team and we split up once we break the garage door open. Cory and I head to the right together, immediately taking on fire from two suspects.
They’ve come prepared, they knew we would be here. Taking cover behind a row of tires, I let off two shots that bring the shooters down.
“Two suspects down on the east corridor.” I call through our radio, and peer over the tires to make sure we are clear to continue on. “We’ve got three more coming in hot. We need some help over here.”
“Just cuffed three on the west side.” Milo pants through the radio. “Headed your way.”
Sarge grunts in my ear. “They were waiting for us.”
Shots bounce off the tires, and I peek through, opening fire. One suspect drops just as I feel the piercing pain through my arm. I let out a shrill shout, and drop to the floor. Oh fuck. My stomach was hit too, even through my vest. Cory hurries over to me, and grabs me by my vest to pull me to cover.
