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“Do you know what time you'll be getting here this Friday?”
“Should be by seven. Will that work?”
“Of course. Text me what you want for dinner, and I'll pick it up before you get here.”
“You got it.”
There was a longer than usual pause before I cleared my throat. “Well, I'll let you get back to work. Make sure you get some sleep tonight, okay?”
His low laugh sounded tired, and my heart twisted with worry. “I will. Talk to you tomorrow.”
“Good night.”
The words “I love you” hovered in my throat, almost a visceral presence, but I held back. Not because I didn't know how I felt. It's just we hadn't gotten to that stage yet. I felt a pinch of worry in my chest as I lowered the phone to my lap.
He sounded downright weary, and I wished I knew why work was so stressful. I knew from before we’d reconnected over the holidays that he was a busy guy. He ran an investment company, one he'd started himself in the aftermath of everything blowing up with their father and his business. I imagined he worked long hours. As it was, I worked plenty of hours myself. Now that I was on a tenure track, I knew I would be staying busy.
Of course, that train of thought immediately rounded back to what would happen if we decided to really commit and figure out who was going to move. I flung my phone on the couch cushion beside me, shaking my head as I tucked my feet under my hips. A minute later, I stood from the couch and crossed into the kitchen to pour myself a glass of wine. I needed to relax, not obsess about Ian.
When I spoke to him Thursday, he sounded better, more like himself, without that thread of tension. Friday, he texted me in the afternoon to say he'd love some takeout from one of our favorite Thai restaurants.
I was walking to pick it up when my phone vibrated in my pocket. Sliding it out, Ian’s name flashed on the screen. I answered immediately.
“Hey, Jane. I'm glad I caught you.”
“What's up?”
The sound of him inhaling sharply filtered through the phone. “Look, I'm not gonna make it tonight.”
I reflexively glanced at my watch, my feet coming to a stop. Someone walking behind me skirted around. I stepped to the edge of the sidewalk, stopping to lean against a brick building.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, it'll be fine. I've got a problem at work, dealing with some stuff. I won't be focused if I come up.”
This was odd, if only because I didn’t see how he couldn’t have known this only a few hours earlier. After a brief pause, I opened my mouth to tell him I wouldn't mind if he worked all weekend here. Because I missed him, and I wanted to see him. I didn’t say any of that.
“Oh,” I finally said.
“Rain check for next weekend? I'll come up there, I promise,” he said.
“Oka-aay.” I heard myself saying slowly. An uncomfortable sense of uncertainty was unspooling inside.
“I miss you,” he said quickly. “I'm really sorry.”
“It's okay, I understand.” I tried to force some lightness into my tone, but I knew my words were coming out stilted, and my throat felt tight. “I miss you too.”
“I'll call you tomorrow.”
“All right. Good night,” I said, trying to force my tone to sound casual.
I hung up quickly. I pushed away from the building and began walking as I slid my phone in my pocket and adjusted my purse where the strap was angled across my chest. I decided to get that Thai takeout anyway. I was starving, and I'd rather have that than try to scramble up something on my own at home. That would only make me feel even lonelier.
ChapterTwenty-Four
Jane
“What do you mean he's not here?” Thea asked.
