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It feels like years have passed since Corsi told me what my blood oath would be, but it’s only been a second or two.
I never relish killing. As stone-faced and emotionless as I am when I do kill others, it affects me every time. I know my exact count. I know every person I’ve ever killed, I know what it does to me, and I know how it affects the world of the person I killed.
I’ve made my decision. And everyone in this room knows what I’m going to do too.
Call me a heartless, cruel bastard. I know I’m damned to hell. No amount of forgiveness will absolve me of what I’m about to do or what I’ve done in the past.
I also know that if I do this, the Retribution Kings will become my enemy. They will demand retribution. They will hunt me down to the end of my days. The only escape will be to destroy all of them.
And yet, it doesn’t change my mind.
I grab my gun.
Lift it.
Aim.
And fire.
A high-pitched gasp sounds behind me.
I don’t have to turn around to know whose voice that is. Still, I don’t react. I’m as emotionless as ever.
But inside, my heart drops at her shock.
I turn slowly, watching Rialta stare at me. I see the surprise, the fear, the anguish on her face. This is an image of me that will stay with her forever.
That’s what breaks me. My job to make her fall in love with me or show my love for her just got harder. If she didn’t already hate me, she will now. She’ll think of me as a monster—a ruthless beast incapable of love.
And she’d be right.
Chapter14
Rialta
“I knowyou don’t understand why I arranged this marriage, why you can’t choose your own husband, or why you had to give your boyfriend up.” Vincent pauses. “I know you don’t even truly believe that I love you.” He takes a deep breath as if it pains him. Suddenly, I see how much older he looks than the last time I saw him. His hair is whiter, his face paler and gaunter.
He pulls me into a hug, and I hug him back. He’s the father I always wanted, and the father I always hated. He is everything I’ve ever wanted to have and everything I wanted to stay away from.
Every day that I was gone, I wanted my family back, my real family. Him and River are it. They are my real family. And I know everything he’s done has been to protect me—even in his own fucked up way.
“I hope someday you understand why I’m forcing you into this marriage. And you’ll realize it was the right decision.” He pulls back and looks at me with tears in his eyes. I’ve never seen him so vulnerable looking. “And if you never come to understand my decision or agree with it, then I hope you can someday forgive me.”
I don’t know what to say to that. I can’t forgive him for what he’s making me do. And I definitely don’t understand how this benefits me.
I give him a soft smile, and then he says, “It’s time.”
I suck in a breath, knowing this time will be different. Last time, during my attempted marriage to Beckett, I almost died from poisoning. This time, death won’t save me.
I won’t die.
There won’t be an attempt on my life.
I won’t be saved in any way. Vincent, River, and Beckett have made sure of it. I will be protected. I will be safe. And once married, I know that Lennox will protect me.
Safe.
I should feel good knowing I might live much longer than I ever expected. My marriage will ensure my safety. I will have someone with me who has vowed to do whatever it takes to keep me safe, but it doesn’t make me feel any better. I don’t enjoy the feeling of being safe.
