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I imagined her letting me lead her if I tried to take her hand, but I never reached for her.
Eventually we made it to the school, and when we walked to the playground, I wondered if she would want me to push her the way Kyrie did when we snuck up there. Instead, Sorina walked into the baseball field and over the fence. Again, I followed, eyes seeing everything in the dark.
The pond wasn’t too far into the woods, and the grass grew higher the closer we got. Despite the October chill, Sorina was wearing a skirt and fishnet stockings. The weeds caught in the delicate fabric, ripping, but she didn’t seem to care.
She stripped when she reached the pond, and I felt a thrill, a deep need to chase her into water.
Instead, I stared at the pile of clothes, though we both knew I wanted to look at her.
I heard the water moving as she entered, and it pulled my gaze to her despite my thinly veiled restraint.
When I looked at her, I saw her bones and moonlight reflecting off her skin. She was a magnet, but her eyes couldn’t hold me for long.
As if hypnotized, I looked beyond the water, into the woods, a slow pull making me blink. When I saw nothing there but the dark and a flash of red light behind my eyelids, I shook my head.
“Is it cold?” I asked when I looked back at Sorina.
“Not to me,” she answered, and I thought I knew what she was saying.
After a moment, I kicked my shoes off and walked to the edge of the pond, stepping into the water. It was chilly, and I shivered at the life there, going no farther. It wasn’t stagnant or calm. “What the fuck?”
“A creek feeds this pond,” Sorina said, looking down into the dark. “The water comes from the earth. From somewhere darker.”
“Do you want me to come in?” I asked, shivering at the meaning.
“If you want to,” she stretched out the last letter, singing again.
I was self-conscious of my skin in front of everyone, still hiding in the locker room despite nearly being caught by Eric and Justin before. It was worth the risk, worth letting no one see me exposed.
I pulled my shirt over my head, then my jeans. My boxers stayed on.
For a moment, Sorina spun in the water, then looked at me. The white of her eyes reflected in the night. “Take them off, Nicholas.” The hair on the back of my neck stood when she spoke. Her voice was older than mine at times. Older than everyone’s.
I said, “I don’t like to be naked in front of people.”
And Sorina said, “I am not people.”
“I know.” I heard the double meaning, the wondering I had felt. “How old are you?”
“How many times must we do this?”
“The questions will stop when you actually answer.” I shrugged and reached for the elastic of my boxers, turning when I pulled them off. When I turned back to the water, my dick was in my hands, cupped and covered. Sorina’s eyes were on my eyes. I wanted her to look me over. But she sometimes gave me what I needed in my dreams, not what I wanted. It was jarring to see the gift in the flesh.
She held my stare as I entered the water, never wavering. When submerged to the waist, I took my hands away from my dick and moved them along the water’s surface.
She looked me in the eye and smiled, blue eyes bright. “So demure.”
“I’m not.”
“So scared of everything. Just like her.”
“Who?” I asked.
“Youraunt.”
I didn’t want to talk about Valerie. Not after agreeing to the dinner with the Deacon. I was angry at her, and a small part of me felt betrayed. I pushed the thought away, moving in the water toward Sorina.
“Tell me about your parents.” I said it like a command, not like a question, hoping to inch the power play in my direction.
