AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I got you. Heard Mona gave you a wake-up call in the library the other day. She also said Alaska ripped your head off every chance she got, and I am not talking about the one on top of your dick.” Rush laughs as he throws his shirt in the locker.
“Yeah, man, I don’t know why she has it out for me. She’s been here what two months and is already trying to cause drama. That year without her was bliss.” Mainly because I didn’t have to face her, and thus, face the consequences of my actions. Evasion has become a great skill of mine.
“Crazy how all she needed to do was graduate high school to drop the pathetic girl we always ignored. I saw her in the hall the other day; fuck, she looked good.” Rush rubs his hands together and I shake my head. If he wants to try and touch that woman, prepare to bring the first aid kit, because Alaska has claws.
“Be careful, you might come out with a few scars.” I grab my towel and put it around my shoulders.
“Battle scars, baby.” Rush’s grin grows as he flexes his muscles.
“Come on, Casanova, let’s hit the water before coach forces us to do ten laps for every minute we are late.” It’s the kind of punishment I need to make my body obey today.
Once my body hits the water, I am home. I am found and I am anywhere but in this moment. Far away from my problems outside of this pool. Through the water, my body takes a dive into a dreamland I never hope to resurface from.
One arm slices up in the air to stab back into the ripples, forcing my limbs to drag me from one side of the pool to another. My coach is out there watching every angle, every second I mistake as a detour to explore my happy place. But I execute it perfectly; I come out of the water and on the top of the leaderboard. Those achievements are a small pebble in my sense of confidence, because I am weighed down by other matters of the mind.
“Hey, you want to go grab breakfast before class, Lad?” Rush is shaking his head, flicking water everywhere.
“I think I am going to stay here and do a few more drills. But let’s catch up for lunch at the dining hall.” I am still wading in the water as he dries off.
“Sounds good, don’t work too hard.” He leans over to slap my hand with a high-five.
Rush walks away and I wonder if I should ask him for help. Maybe he knows something, someway without my dad or coach finding out I need assistance to get better.
“Hey, Rush?” Bobbing my body up to catch him before he hits the locker room.
“Yeah, man?”
“Do you remember the accident last year?” I don’t stare into his eyes. I stare at the number five tiled into the wall, running my fingers over the curves.
“Is your shoulder or neck still hurting? Do you want me to get the physical therapist to check you out?” Rush squats in front of me.
“No, it isn’t that. It’s just they gave me pain pills and I wonder if I should stop taking them.” My goggles are scrunched on my forehead as I look up to him.
“Well, the doctor’s prescribed them to you, right? So they know if you should stop taking them. But if you think you are getting addicted, you might want to try weaning yourself off of them.” Rush lifts a shoulder and drops it at the conversation.
“Right.” But I already know I’m dependent on them.
“Well, if you want to stop using them, then take yourself off them slowly. I hear they are a bitch to cut cold turkey. We don’t want you dying while going through withdrawals.” It’s a joke to him, but not to me.
“Gotcha.” I sink lower into the water until the smell of chlorine tickles my nose.
“Yeah, maybe you could ask Alaska. Didn’t she go to some rehab for some addiction? That girl sure is screwed up seven ways to Sunday.” Rush shakes his head and laughs as he leaves.
“Fuck.” Slap at the water with frustration. I am alone in this Olympic-sized pool. I kick off the side and lay on my back. Letting the water cruise over my chest and abs as I stare at the ceiling.
The last thing I want to do is ask someone when I have a problem. One issue I can’t seem to fix, but the last person I ever thought I would have to ask is Alaska of all people. But I think I can trust her, if any events from yesterday proved that.
Maybe she picked up techniques or tools while being sentenced to rehabilitation last year. I bring my arms wide like wings and push the water to my feet. Closing my eyes, I imagine myself flying away. Like a bird swimming underwater. Farther down into the deep depths of the ocean no one can reach, where nothing can be seen. Where the world down there is cold and lost things can’t be found.
I fill my lungs with air and shove my body underneath the surface. Push myself to the bottom of the pool and I stretch out my limbs like a starfish until my body floats back to the surface. I do this action time and time again. Until I find my peace with the world above water.
Chapter 3
Alyeska
Ladhasalastname; I can’t think of it right now because he is walking towards me soaking wet. I’m sure he even has a middle name too; men like him always fucking do. Like he just had an epiphany in the pool and jetted over to my place on the wall. Luckily, he has clothes on instead of the navy-blue speedo.
It’s too early for that kind of show.
