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How can this girl be so new to my life and be tearing it apart. I’m trying to breathe over here, walking toward the elevator with her. My hand is at the small of her back as we walk, and Lucy slips her other hand into mine. My fingers close over hers and my heart skips a damn beat like I’m some kind of school girl. The effect that Lucy has on me is like nothing I’ve ever felt before and I want to be able to get my head clear and get my cock buried deep inside of her. I thought those two things were connected, but now I’m not so sure. Because the way that I need to be inside Lucy, that’s the same intensity with which my feelings toward her confuse me. I’m baffled by how I can feel so much for this girl. I’m confused more than anything by how I don’t take advantage of the perfect situation to twist and turn any way I want. This girl is utterly reliant on me, and instead of taking advantage like I would in any business deal, I find myself thinking about her feelings. About the feelings that she creates in me. I need her more than I’d like to admit.
The elevator becomes a challenge. The idea of making out in an elevator shouldn’t be as hot to me as it is now, but I want to press her against the wall of this elevator the instant the doors close.
When the doors actually do close, it’s Lucy’s hand that squeezes mine. I look at her, an ounce of shock ready to convert into a full gallon of surprise when her lips close over mine. Well, Lucy was so inexperienced. A virgin. Making out in an elevator is exciting for her because she’s not some tired out girl that’s done everything.
And it’s exciting for me, the man everyone thinks is tiring out plenty of women in this city. I gave up that life a long time ago when I thought I was marrying someone who cared about me, and when that turned out to be a business move on her part, well, I just gave up women entirely.
How can I be going through my own soft little moment with Lucy now? Her lips on mine aren’t tentative. They’re soft. Lucy is kissing me softly, almost as if she’s asking for permission. I aimed to charm her pants off, but right now she’s the one charming me. In a way that does mean that I succeeded, and I don’t think I want to keep dwelling on this. Not when her body presses firmer into mine… and then I hear the elevator ask for my card and code. Nothing like an interruption to make you appreciate what’s before you.
Reluctantly, I tear just part of my body away from her, but my hand is still in hers. My side is still pressed to her side. I don’t feel foolish wanting to touch her like this.
That’s truly the worst part, I realize as we both fade away into our kisses.
I don’t want Lucy to want me the way that she wants me. I already knew that I wasn’t good enough for her, but I’m ruining this poor girl. She’s sweet. She should be with a man who can love her. A man who can marry her. I’m just the rich asshole helping her with her brother. Her affection for me is wholly undeserved.
Still, I can’t deny the sparks that fly between us. I never understood that expression, sparks flying, until I met Lucy and a fireworks show could be going off every time her hazel eyes met mine. I want to kiss her until we both wake up in a new life and there’s nothing to be worried about. But that’s not how life works, and I know this because I’m able to buy just about anything else. But I can’t buy my way out of how wrong for Lucy I am.
Worst of all, I can’t buy myself out of the parts of me that want her no matter what. That don’t want me to let me save her.
When we’re about to walk into the penthouse door, she turns and faces me, holding my hand, smiling. Lucy’s too goddamn good for me and I just can’t take this. Well, I can. That’s what’s so rough. I’m going to take every drop of everything Lucy has to give.
What will be left when she realizes who I really am?
I smile back at her. It isn’t hard to fake being the guy who wants her so much right now. To be charming. Because I do want her more than anything. It’s a hazard to us both.
The soft way her eyes crinkle when she smiles makes me need to breathe her in. As soon as we’re inside, I close the door and press her against it. Softly, gently. I’m being charming, remember?
