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My life, no, my heart cannot be a lie.
He doesn’t turn as I approach. I freeze for an instant when I go to step out onto the promontory. It’s narrower than it looked, barely wide enough for Bahr. The protrusion can’t be more than four feet across but he’s out there on the point, confident and certain as ever. Hubris means nothing to him and he puts all his faith into his belief that the planet loves and wouldn’t possibly harm him. Which is such a foreign, alien idea that I struggle to not reject it out of hand.
I force my foot past the edge and onto the thin strip of land. The drop to either side is a long fall to the ocean and sharp rocky shore. Far enough that I have no doubt I’d be dead on landing if not before. One glance is more than enough, after which I keep my eyes firmly on him.
“Bahr?” I ask, coming to a stop an arm’s length behind him.
“Yes, my treasure,” he says, but he doesn’t turn away from the horizon.
I hesitate. This isn’t playing out like any of the scenarios that ran through my thoughts and I’m not sure what to say or do now. I finally settle on the obvious.
“Are you okay?”
He doesn’t answer immediately. I watch him breathing, the rise and fall of his wings as he inhales then exhales; the only concession to him being a living thing and not made of stone like the ground beneath our feet.
“I am not,” he says at last and then he turns around.
The look on his face breaks my heart and I react. Forgetting my fear of the fall or how narrow this protrusion is, I run to him and throw myself around him. I want to take his pain away, to make him happy, to do whatever he needs to never look like this again.
I press my face against his cool scales and squeeze him with all my might. There’s a moment of hesitation then his arms enclose, and he wraps his tail around my waist, pulling me as tight as possible.
We hold each other in silence, finding comfort and solace in each other. All my worries and doubts disappear like shadows fading before the rising sun. Pressing my ear to his chest his heart thunders loudly, but it’s odd because it’s a double beat. But it’s nice. Really nice, comfortable. It feels natural no matter that he’s an alien. It’s right. This is where I belong.
After a time of silent holding, he kisses the top of my head several times and then his hands drop a little lower, touching my butt and I like this too. I become acutely aware of every point of contact between us. The press of his hard, muscled body to my much softer flesh. I trace circles with my fingers on his back, running my hands up to touch his wings.
His wings are fascinating. The way they emerge from his back, a natural growth, but touching them and feeling where they connect is feeling pure muscle. The strength he has in that area alone is evident in swollen musculature and knowing that those wings will support his not inconsiderable weight.
I kiss the hard muscles of his chest and work my way up until our lips find each other and we’re kissing. It’s every bit as magical as it was the first time. I’m swept away by the passion and love. His kiss is intense and insistent and as we kiss there is no denying his passion as it stiffens and digs into my belly.
Breaking the kiss at last I put my hands on either side of his face. I lose my train of thought for only a moment, his beautiful eyes holding all my attention, but I quickly find my way back out of those deep pools of desire.
“Talk to me,” I say.
A slight frown is the only outwards reaction, but he remains silent. My heart beats and I feel his thundering against my chest with its strange double beat. I wait. Patiently because right now I realize I’ll wait for him forever. It doesn’t matter how long it takes because I know he needs this. Needs my patience and my understanding.
“All I believed,” he says, speaking at last, but pausing and shaking his head. “It cannot be a lie.”
My chest clenches tight and it’s hard to breathe. His pain is raw and true and I don’t know what to say, but I want to fix it with all my heart. I struggle to find words and he must be as well because he doesn’t speak, but his rich, unblinking eyes stay on mine waiting for whatever wisdom I might add.
Wisdom is not something I ever thought of myself as having. I’ve read though. A lot. More than anyone else I know, books have always been my escape from the drudgery that was my life. Except I mostly read romance or romantic stories, not books that would make me ‘wise’ by any means. Yet, I know what I believe.
“Bahr, I can never fully comprehend what you’re going through,” I say, stroking my fingers along his face. “But this is what I know. Some way, somehow, in all this vast, incredible universe, against impossible odds, you and I found each other. And that, my love, has to mean something.”
He doesn’t move or breathe. If I wasn’t pressed as tightly to him as I am, I don’t think I could be sure that his heart is beating. Slowly his eyes open wider. His brow lifts, raising his horns and then a smile takes over his mouth and I, with all that I am, want to kiss that smile and those lips forever.
“Of course,” he says, then exhales heavily and shakes his head.
He lifts me up and swings me around. My heart leaps into my throat as survival instincts clench my stomach but then I give all my trust to him and the nerves stop. I laugh. Loud and long, a full laugh and he joins me. Laughter is a medicine, a truth and a celebration of us.
“I love you!” I scream as we spin and he dances with me away from the edge and across the open field.
My heart soars and my thoughts are light and airy. Bahr is all encompassing as if the two of us are burning on a pyre of pure love and joy.
“My treasure,” he says, his deep voice rumbling.
He pulls me close enough to kiss and in a single kiss our bodies are immolated with passion. Every nerve is alight with a burning fire. I am aware of every sense in ways that I’ve never experienced.
He trails kisses over my face as I run my hands over all his flexing muscles. When my feet touch the ground, I don’t hesitate to begin the annoying process of undressing. I need to be naked with him. I want his eyes on me, I want him in me, Iwant, and it’s a throbbing, aching need that will not be denied.
