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I chill out on the ferry ride home feeling great about the day. My band brothers mean the world to me. They do. But my life with Alex and Lena is most important right now. I’m going to protect our family bubble for as long as possible.
Now that we’re officially engaged, a little part of me deep, deep inside carries some hope we’ll have more kids. She’d always been against the idea until Lena though, so I won’t push her. We’re still young. She and I have plenty of time to figure it out.
Whether or not she’s willing to expand our family, I’m not going to take her or Lena for granted. Ever.
They’re truly all I need.
It’s hard to believe how perfect our life is.
I’m going to do everything in my power to keep it this way.
It’s funny how things have changed between me and Zoey but have also stayed status quo.
My BFF isfinallyback from traveling the world with her fiancé. It’s been a little over seven months since we’ve had an in-depth heart-to-heart. Sure, she texted me and sent pictures every now and then, but nothing substantive since we were all in Atlanta at an awards banquet where Ty was honored for his charity. While he was on stage accepting his trophy, I ended up taking care of her in the VIP bathroom.
And then, the next day, she and Ty were gone.
Oh, I’m cool with it. We can go for months without talking. For instance, after she broke things off with Ty before LTZ went on their first tour, she lost touch with everyone but her parents. She essentially dropped off the planet. I put in a bit of effort, but after a while, I stopped reaching out.
Not because I was mad. I wasn’t. We’ve been like sisters ever since we were little kids. Our friendship is unbreakable.
Plus, I was secretly hooking up with Ty’s bandmate and didn’t tell her. Neither of us is perfect.
In any case, every girl should have a Zoey in her life. Someone who will be loyal until the day you die and, when it matters, show up for you. So, yeah. I’m glad she’s back. A girl needs her best friend.
I would love to talk to her about what’s happening with me. Get a woman’s perspective. The thing is? I’m terrified. My cramps are getting worse. And worse. And worse. My usual ways of managing my pain aren’t working so Jace used his rock-star connections to schedule an appointment with a specialist.
He friggin’ watched over my shoulder as I did it.
Before the specialist would see me, I had to visit my regular doctor for a referral. Stupid health insurance. Luckily, the timing worked out perfectly since I was already coming into the city to lunch with Zoey. I’ve already been poked and prodded and ultrasounded by the time I pull into her driveway. I barely kill the engine before Zoey bursts through her front door. “Hey!” She flings herself into my arms. “I’ve missed you so much.”
I resist bursting into tears. “I’ve missedyouso much. I was bummed when you couldn’t make it out this weekend, so I decided to come to you.”
“I’m sorry I’m such a sucky friend.” Zoey is so serious, which cracks me up. “I just have so much to do for the wedding.”
“I was kidding,butterfly.” I use Ty’s nickname for her to let her know I’m not actually mad at her.
Her relief is evident when she jumps in the car. I drive to Alki Beach to have lunch at Duke’s Chowder House. To me, nothing screams Seattle more than eating a bowl of delicious clam chowder and gazing out at Puget Sound. We take a seat at the window. Order our food and clasp hands across the table.
“So, are you pregnant yet?” I tease.
Zoey rests her chin on her hand and stares at me dreamily. “Not yet. Hopefully soon. I’ve only been off birth control for a couple of weeks.”
“What? What does that mean? You’re not at least using condoms?” I’m blown away. Sure, they’re engaged, but they’ve been back together for a year. A lot of that time has been tumultuous. I want to tell her that jumping into parenthood too fast can be challenging, but I don’t. It’s not for me to tell her what to do. Or whatnotto do, as the case may be.
She laughs, somewhat nervously. “Nope. We decided to just let nature take its course. Both of us want to start our family.”
“Holy shit.” I bring my hands up to my cheeks and bug my eyes out dramatically like that kid fromHome Alone.
Zoey looks like she desperately wants to say something else, but she doesn’t. Instead looks down at her chowder, stirring oyster crackers around. “I just hope we’re ready. Ty says he is. And I think I am?”
“Have the headaches gone away?” I’m dying to know because of what I’m going through. “My doctor is running a battery of tests. I wonder if my cramps are a hormonal thing too.”
“Jace’s wonder-tongue isn’t making it all better?” Zoey never can resist reminding me that she caught Jace going down on me in the barn earlier this year. I mean, it wasn’t my fault she took the earlier ferry that day. My cramps were bad, as usual. Jace and I thought we had another hour before she got there.
I hold up my hand. “Argh. I can’t believe you caught us like that. Ewww.”
“Oh, but Idid.” She waggles her eyebrows.
