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I wanted to tell Charles everything. After keeping my secret to myself for so long, he was the person I wanted to tell the most because I wanted him to know me—all of me. He knew snippets of my life, but for once, I wanted to give someone the whole picture.
He squeezed my forearm, leaning in to get in my line of sight. “You can trust me, Becky. I’ll protect you.”
I squeezed my eyes tight. What a lovely thought, letting Charles protect me. Valiant of him. But he had no idea. He couldn’t protect me from Paul. He had no idea what kind of monster Paul was. If anything, this family, Charles included, would be collateral damage, and I couldn’t let that happen. I would never forgive myself. I couldn’t even fathom accidentally bringing that devil anywhere close to this perfect family.
I slowly extracted myself from him and ignored his question, opening the fridge and avoiding eye contact.
“Becky …” Desperation. There was desperation in his voice.
Charles was never desperate, and it tugged at my heart. Tugged so hard that I almost …
No!
My ears burned. I needed a minute to myself, but everyone would be down soon, and I had to get breakfast ready.
Task at hand.
Focus on the task at hand.
Glasses out. Juice for Mary. Milk for Sarah.
“Becky!” he whispered fiercely.
Cut the pancakes up for Mary. Tiny pieces. She likes tinier pieces.
“Becky …” He gently yanked me to face him, his face tormented. “I just want to get to know you more.”
There was a long, pregnant pause, and our eyes locked. I could see the confusion and sincerity in his eyes, questions he had for me, questions I couldn’t answer because it would reveal too much.
I trusted him. I did. But not with this. My mother was harmless. She could no longer hurt me or this family. So, while talking about her was painful, it didn’t bring imminent danger.
Still, I could feel this pressure cooker building inside of me, wanting to tell him, but I was also curious as to why he wanted to know so badly. “Why?” The word flew from my lips before I had a chance to stop it. I should have stayed silent. It didn’t matter why he wanted to get to know me more because I wasn’t going to bring up things I wanted to forget.
A small breath escaped him before he leaned into me. “Because … because I like you, Becky.” His words flew out effortlessly, straightforward, honest—all qualities signature to Charles, the CEO.
And I knew what he meant—that helikedme. Not just as a person, but he was also attracted to me. I guessed I should’ve known with the couple of hints he’d dropped, especially when he was sick, but I’d just assumed he was delirious.
My heart melted, and I wanted to cry because I liked him too. Good God, did I like him.
His fingers trailed from my wrist, intertwining our fingers. “And I’m kind of wondering … if you like me too.”
His intense concern shifted into the sweetest, most vulnerable smile. Something I’d never thought I’d see when I first started here. He’d been so stoic then, but he had been melting these last several weeks. Maybe I hadn’t wanted to see it because it would mean too much. But now, here he was, revealing his emotions and looking at me like a boy and begging me not to break his heart.
I bit my lip, feeling shy all of a sudden.
He exhaled through his nose. “Becky … I’m trying here.”
I stared at our intertwined fingers, feeling a little lost, out of control, out of my depth. We were so different, alike but different.
“I do like you,” I admitted softly because I knew in my gut that what I felt for this man went above the boss-nanny relationship. It went above my physical attraction toward him. I was attracted to him wholly—his personality, his physical appearance, his heart. “But you want to know things that I’ve buried. I’m not about to go digging them up again.” I peered up at him, practically begging him with my eyes. “I just can’t go there.”
Our intense moment was abruptly broken by the sound of the girls’ voices.
“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!” the girls sang.
Sarah walked in, carrying a box with the biggest polka-dot bow on the top, and Charles and I took one healthy step away from each other. I took a huge breath to cleanse me from these roller-coaster emotions and put on a brave face for the girls.
Mary charged toward me, practically jumping me in the process. “Happy birthday, Becky! We love you.”
