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I opened the door, and my breath caught. She stood there, looking like a miserable mess but it didn’t matter. She was still the most breathtaking thing I’d ever seen, and I knew in that instance that I’d wait—forever if need be. Because I only wanted her. And she held my heart.
Immediately, I pulled her into my apartment and into my arms. She melted into me, and I held her without saying a word, unmoving, our breathing in sync. I ushered her to the couch, where I sat and held her tighter.
She burrowed into me, her head on my chest. Soft sobs escaped her lips, and it crushed me. A hundred fast balls in the chest would be better than this.
“Who did it? Who do I gotta beat up?” It was meant as a joke, but I’d beat up her brother if I had to, if it meant securing her happiness. “Do you want me to buy you some ice cream?” I pushed her hair out of her face, but her eyes were shut tightly. “Rocky road? Cookies and cream? Tell me what you want, and it’s yours.” I cupped her face lightly between my palms. “Cake too. Whatever.” I kissed her cheek and then pecked her lips. “Just stop crying,” I said, my voice a broken whisper. “’Cause I can’t take it.”
Her eyes flipped open, meeting mine, and I saw it—the desolation and despair. And in that moment, I wanted to wrap my hands around her little brother’s neck and squeeze because, ultimately, this was his fault for making her feel like shit.
“Give him some space,” I urged. “Come with me to LA, and when you come back, I am sure everything will have calmed down.”
She tore her eyes from mine, pulling my hands from her face. “I … I can’t go.”
She might as well have slapped me in the face or jabbed me in the chest ’cause I flinched. I should have suspected this, but I’d been holding on to stupid hope.
“Austin …” Her cries heightened as she swiped at her cheeks. “I shouldn’t even be here, but I wanted to do this in person.”
Fuck.
A knife this time. I felt it. Directly in between my ribs.
She was breaking up with me.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
And I wasn’t about to stand for it. I wasn’t going to let her go.
I stood up and began pacing, thinking, trying to find a way out of this shitty situation for both of us. “Before you make any crazy decisions, I want you to know, I take back everything I said when you left before. I’ll wait until this dies down. Forever. I don’t care. I’ll wait.” I could hear the desperation in my tone, but I didn’t care.
Screw my pride. That had gone out the door when I thought I would lose her.
“You don’t have to come with me to LA. I get it. I understand.” I got on my knees, holding both of her hands in mine. “I get you have to settle things with Alec, wait until things calm down. But they will. I promise you.”
She shook her head, unbelieving. “He said … it’s either you or him.” More tears fell down her face.
I gritted my teeth.What a little asswipe.“You know he doesn’t mean it, right? He’s just mad. And I get where he’s coming from, but you can’t take what he’s saying as truth. Not now.”
Her head dropped to her hands, and she visibly shook. “I just can’t see past now. I have to give him time to heal and process and have time to forgive me.”
“Forgive you?” I shot up from the floor, my body tense. “For what? You didn’t do anything wrong.” My shoulder hurt from the tension rolling through me. Forgive her, my ass. Falling in love was not wrong.
When she lifted her head, her eyes told all—heartache, sorrow, remorse, and regret.
I swallowed down the pain.
“Maybe we should take some time apart right now.”
No. No time. I knew I’d said I’d wait, but I didn’t fucking want to. I wanted her in LA with me. I wanted her in my bed, in my life, in my future.
And I knew, if she took time, maybe she’d get over me, and here I’d be, waiting like a chump while she moved on to date or fall in love with someone else.
No fucking way in hell.
I lost it.
I sat on my heels and ran one heavy hand down my face. “I don’t get you.” My eyes met hers, equally broken and tortured. “When are you going to stop being a saint? You got your wings, all right? You got those when you left college to move back home and every minute after that.”
I bit my cheek, hard enough to taste blood. I should stop now, but like the bastard I was, I spewed it all out, leaving every angry word on the table. She’d already stomped on my heart. I had nothing left.
