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The silence stretches on. I want to say it’s uncomfortable, but it never is when we’re together. Even if shit is tense like it is now, something still feels right.
She’s still withholding secrets, and while it might piss me off, I know I’m not in any position to start making demands.
“I haven’t forgiven you,” she says eventually. “Last night… Last night was a lapse in judgement fuelled by painkillers and exhaustion.”
“Sure. Yeah. I know,” I say, trying to keep any of the hurt that’s slicing through my chest at bay.
Holding her last night, watching her sleep, knowing that in some small way I was helping was… well, it was everything. I knew it wouldn’t go very far in the grand scheme of things. That she would wake up and regret it. Much like I did in the moment I discovered that breaking down in her arms not so long ago was real and not a dream—or nightmare—like I’d first believed.
“Nothing about any of this is okay, Nico. I need you to know that.”
“Trust me, I do. I’m going to make it up to you, though.”
“You don’t even know what you’re making up for. You don’t remember what you did and why.”
“I’m sure I’ll figure it out eventually. I’m starting to remember bits.”
“Oh yeah?” she muses with a mouthful of pastry.
“Yeah. I remember railing you against the wall in the bathroom and how fucking incredible your cunt felt wrapped around my cock.”
A bitter laugh falls from her lips.
“Of course that’s what you remember.”
“Fucking heaven, ba—” I swallow the rest of that word when she shoots me a cutting look. “Just saying that I’d never forget getting inside you for long.”
“Not really the most important part of the evening though, was it? How about the woman you paid for to distract my date? Or the fact you sat there all night stalking me like a grade A creep? The whole situation was fucked up long before you even tried to kill me.”
“Trust me, I wasn’t trying to kill you. I’d never—”
“Could have fooled me. It was fucking terrifying, Nico.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It doesn’t fix anything though, does it?”
I shake my head. “I don’t know what else to say, to do.”
“There isn’t anything. You fucked up. Over and over again, you fucked up, Nico. Until you sort your own shit out, there will be no making up for any of the crap you did to me. You’re a mess. And I’m not just talking about your face.”
“I know,” I whisper as the door opens on the other side of the room and a nurse walks in, quickly followed by Jodie and my sister.
Calli’s eyes narrow as she studies me sitting here with Brianna. They swirl with anger and relief, but that relief isn’t enough to stop her being pissed with me.
I get it, I do. But when the fuck did she decide to take Brianna’s side over mine?
“You’re all good to go, Brianna,” the nurse says softly as Jodie and Calli step deeper into the room.
“What are you doing here?” Calli snaps.
“Nice to see you too, Sis,” I quip.
“He brought me breakfast,” Brianna explains. “I’m humouring him.”
“Ouch,” I say, lifting my hand to cover my heart. Although, damn, it’s not all an act.
“You’re barking up the wrong tree if you want sympathy, Brother.” Calli scowls at me before turning to Brianna, her face morphing into a smile. “Ready to blow this joint?”
