Page 41 of A Reason to Stay


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I nodded, unable to say anything. He gave my shoulders another quick squeeze before he let me go.

Over dinner, Andrew kept looking up at me, like he wanted to say something. He waited until I finished eating, and he folded his hands in front of himself and looked at me.

“Maria… Can I point something out to you without you getting defensive?”

“Maybe,” I shrugged. “I’ll try.”

“Every time you call your folks, they upset you.”

He wasn’t wrong. I hadn’t called that often, for that exact reason.

“I’m not saying you should cut them out or anything. But… you’re not obligated to communicate with someone who regularly hurts you and disrespects you, and who doesn’t respect your boundaries.” He looked down at his plate, busying himself by pushing the remainders of his meal around his plate, as if he were restless and needed to do something with his hands. “And I don’t like the way they talk to you,” he added. “Especially your dad.”

I sighed. “I know you’re right. My mom’s not bad… I think she goes along with him because she doesn’t want to antagonize him. And I don’t really blame her, because he can be a nightmare.”

He nodded, not saying anything.

“I guess… I don’t know,” I shrugged, deciding not to say anything else on the matter. “Whatever.”

“Tell me.”

I looked up and met his gaze. His dark eyes were focused on me, boring into me like I was about to reveal some super important secret that he was desperate to know.

“It’s nothing. I just wish he was more like he was when I was a kid.” I felt my eyes burn a little and I took a sip of water, exhaling to calm myself. Not able to meet his eye, I continued. “He used to be different. He’d take me places, tell me stories, teach me things. He had me help him with the yard, or hold his tools while he did stuff on the house… Like he was trying to connect with me.

“And then right around middle school, when I was twelve or thirteen… I don’t know. Something changed. He grew cold against me, and became demanding. Suddenly it was like no matter what I did, nothing was good enough.”

I sat up straighter and held my chin high, refusing to let myself get down about this whole scenario. “I don’t understand. He has such high expectations of me, but it’s like hewantsme to fail so he doesn’t have to be proud of me.”

“Well then he’s a damn fool.”

“Andrew—”

“Maria, my father doesn’t talk much because he always believed that every word out of your mouth should matter. But he made me memorize these three things.” He stood up and began clearing the table. “One, you bend a dry twig, it snaps. You bend one that’s attached to a root or a plant? One that has water in it, one that has nutrients and resources keeping it alive? Green wood bends but doesn’t break.

“Two. You don’tquituntil youdecideyou’re done.”

He gave me a side-eye. I felt my cheeks heat and attempted to keep his gaze. He stacked the dishes in the dishwasher, and then came back out, surprising me by crouching directly in front of me and forcing me to look him in the eye. He clutched his hands in front of him, like he was afraid he might touch me.

“And three… if you’re going to swear, you don’t do it for fun, do it because the situation calls for it. And your daddy treating you like a failure just because he wants an excuse not to feel like a shit dad, thatdamn wellcalls for it.”

I clenched my jaw and took a deep breath, trying to steady myself.

Andrew’s voice was soft as he spoke. “You may not understand why your dad is acting like a jerk, but I can tell you he’s a damn fool if he ain’t proud of you. And I know a part of you will always want his approval. I know it’s not the same… but I’m damn proud of you. So if he’s gonna be an asshole to you, don’t feel obligated to talk to him. Because every time you call him, you step away from the phone hurt. And he has no right to do that to you. You’re worth more than that, Sugar.”

He reached out a hand and brushed his thumb against my cheek, wiping a tear that escaped before I could stop it.

“I’ll put the boys to bed. You take yourself a hot shower, and we can watch a movie and polish off that eggnog that Elizabeth Cooper brought over. Alright?”

There is no way I’m going to be able to resist falling for this man. I stared down at him, crouched by my feet and staring up at me with near reverence in his eyes, and felt my heart slip right into the palm of his hands.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

On Christmas morning, we sat around the tree at Sarah and Bob’s house drinking coffee and eating chocolates and watching the boys play. They were too young to understand that wonderful things came out of gift bags, so they spent the first thirty minutes touching the shiny bags and glittery paper. Eventually, we started pulling out one toy after another, trying to get them to open the gifts, but they didn’t quite make theconnection. Eleven o’clock rolled around and they were too overwhelmed and exhausted to play anymore, so I put them down in their little portable crib and went back out to spend more time with the grown-ups.

Sarah was a doting grandma. She bought several sets of matching everything, and even knit them matching sweaters with J and M embroidered on the front. There were a few gifts for me as well. A pretty bead necklace, a few cute t-shirts, a pair of hiking boots, and a scarf. They’d given us a gift certificate to the only restaurant in the area that wasn’t a sports bar or a fast-food chain, and told us they’d babysit so we could have a night out. It sounded suspiciously like a date, but it was a free meal with no babies, so Drew and I accepted with excitement. He had a subtle smile on his face as he tucked the certificate into his wallet.

I found a sweet-smelling oil designed to strengthen hair at a local shop in Franklin one afternoon, and had picked that up for Andrew, thinking he might use it in his hair. He stared at it for a few beats longer than I expected, and set it in his little pile with a thoughtful expression.Thank you,he mouthed to me.

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