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“I’m tired of waiting,” I say, letting my tongue slide across the tip of his thumb.
Finn looks absolutely wrecked. “Rest, my love, and then we can discuss this tonight. When everyone is gone.”
His hand falls away from me and then he stands, crouches down, and holds out his arms. Like before.
And when I’m in his arms, it feels right. It feels perfect, but something is still missing.
Something he’s not telling me.
twenty-nine
PRESENT
FINN
God,my heart.
I can’t.
I can’t fuckingbreathe.
I had him and I lost him.
He’s angry with me for saying nothing, but how can I force memories on him? Force an entire relationship on him?
No, he has to remember what we had himself.
If he remembers at all.
Or we’ll have to build it again from scratch.
I can do that. I can start over. I can…
What if he never comes around again?
It took him eight long years the first time.
I clutch at my chest, feeling the organ beat unsteady beneath my hand.
It hurts.
It doesn’t feel like I’ll survive this.
But at least Ihadhim.
Even if it was only for a short time.
It’s enough.
He’ll always be enough.
I press my lips to his hair and feel a sob well up within me.
But I suppress it. I’ll be strong for him.
Always for him.
thirty
