Page 59 of Always Him

“Ready?” he asks, smiling softly at me.

“Yeah.” We move through the dim hallway toward the front door.

And that’s when I hear it, my dad getting home from work.

“Hey,” he says with tired eyes as he steps into the kitchen, his skin a little drawn. Fuck, he looks old and he’s only forty. “Hey, Landon.”

Landon lifts an arm in a friendly wave and smiles at my dad.

“Hey, Mr. Ledger. How are you?”

“Fine. Fine,” he replies and then eyes me.

“I’m going to spend the night over at Landon’s,” I say awkwardly. Our conversation is always stilted. It’s nothing like the warmth of Finn’s parents. “I, uh, texted you.”

“Yeah, shit. I got it. I just…” his eyes meet mine and my heart sinks. It full-on crashes onto the floor. I know that look.

I know it.

My head shakes and I start to tremble. No. No.No.

“Can I speak with you?” he says, nodding to the other side of the room.

But I can’t breathe. I just shake my head, my fingers tingling, my heart racing. Shit.

“Hey,” Landon says, rubbing circles on my back. “Hey, come here,” he says and leads me to the sofa. He presses down on my shoulders and I sink down onto the cushions, my head between my legs, trying to suck in air.

Because Iknowthat look. It means we’re leaving. He’s found something else. I knew it was too good. It was too fucking good for too long.

“What’s wrong?” Landon asks, his voice concerned.

I glance up at my dad and see the sadness in his eyes. He was always too wild to have a kid. He can never put down roots. I was never made for his life and he’s too selfish to make any kind of sacrifice for me.

“We’re moving,” I say.

Landon’s hand stills and he meets my watery gaze.

“What?” he whispers, his face falling.

God, I never want to see that look on his face again. I only ever want to see him happy.

“We…we have to leave.”

“When?”

I glance up at my dad and he runs a hand through his hair. It sticks out to the side and he nods. “Next month.”

Landon swallows loudly, his leg bouncing frantically.

“Where?”

“North Dakota,” my dad says.

“That’s…far,” Landon breathes and I press the palms of my hands into my eyes until I see stars.

I hear my dad’s footsteps retreat into the bedroom, the door close, and the shower turn on.

“That’s not true, right? It can’t be true,” Landon asks and I turn my head to meet his sweet, innocent gaze.

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