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The dream would have been to avoid it all together, but maybe he was right. If I could get back on my feet and find the courage to dip my toes into the symphony stream again without Nicolai’s shadow looming over me, maybe this was the best-case scenario.
“My sister wants me to audition for the symphony here,” I told him. It felt odd to say it aloud to someone, but Ever’s eyes brightened. “I haven’t looked into it, but there are usually openings around the holidays.”
It would be cutting it close, and it was far too late to join before any of the major holiday performances, but there was spring, and I was also in New York, so the opportunities could be endless. So long as no one knew who I was.
“I’d love to see you play. I’ve never done the whole…classical music thing,” Ever said, waving his hand dismissively. It was something I was used to hearing from people my age, and I’d long stopped taking any kind of offense. “One of the teachers at the studio has a playlist of, like, Enya, but I don’t think that counts.”
I laughed and rested my chin on my hand. “Enya used to be my go-to when I had finals. I went to a music school, and everyone thought you could just coast through. Like it was all playing “Frère Jacques” and “Heart and Soul” on the piano and then you walked away with a diploma.”
He grinned. “Wouldn’t that be some shit?”
I shrugged, picking up one of the mushrooms and dipping it into the sauce. I’d all but forgotten my hunger. It was like a constant companion now, but the moment the food hit my belly, I felt a little dizzy, and I ate a few more pieces as Ever started to talk about his own life.
His story was unfamiliar to me. He’d been married and divorced in the span of three years. He had shared custody of a fifteen-month-old with his ex who worked as a manager at one of the local gyms, and he spent most of his off time working out or teaching classes.
“My best friend keeps telling me I need a sugar daddy,” Ever said with a wink as he finished the last sip of his cocktail.
I almost choked on my water, and the only thing that saved me was the server appearing with our food. Ever ordered another drink as I quickly dug in, and he offered me an apologetic look when we were alone.
“I didn’t mean to imply that’s why I invited you out,” Ever said in a rush.
I stared at him. Did I seem the sort who…but no. No, that was impossible. I definitely didn’t look the part, and I was a private tutor for God’s sake. He was obviously joking.
“It’s fine. Like I said, my ex was my first everything, so I feel like I’m about ten years behind. Socially,” I added.
He shook his head with a tiny grin on his face as he cut into his steak. The conversation ebbed and flowed from deeply personal to things like his favorite bagel and his last trip to Montreal with friends where he caught a bad case of norovirus and spent the whole trip kneeling at the toilet.
It was odd, and it was kind of wonderful, and the small, niggling sensation that something was wrong quickly faded into the background. I felt…alive. I felt good. I laughed, and even though I didn’t have my own stories to share, Ever didn’t make me feel like I was inadequate.
It made me realize I could do this. Would I date Ever long-term? It wasn’t very likely, but could we be friends?
“So,” Ever said, setting his knife and fork down. He’d polished off his meal long before I did, and he flexed his biceps a bit as he leaned his forearms on the table. “You say you live in Brooklyn, yeah?”
I nodded, swallowing down a bite of french fry. “Not too far from here. I don’t plan to stay long. My uncle owns the building, and he’s letting me stay for free.”
Ever let out a low whistle. “Where can I get a deal like that?”
I laughed and shook my head. “Trust me, if I had any other option, I’d take it. The place has probably a hundred code violations, no heat, a neighbor who can hear everything I do, and I’m pretty sure a good case of black mold in the walls.”
Ever grimaced. “Okay, that’s…No. Even free rent, that’s not worth it.”
I took a long drink of my water, then dabbed my mouth with the edge of my napkin. “You’re telling me. The moment I can afford it, I’m out.”
His brow furrowed. “You know, I’ve got a couple friends who live nearby with vacancies in their buildings. You want me to ask around for you?”
I shook my head quickly. “Nope. I’m not there yet. I kind of left the UK with nothing, so you know, getting blackballed in the industry by my ex, starting from scratch…” I laughed, trying to make light of it, but something sparked in Ever’s eyes that looked almost like anger.
“I didn’t know it was that bad.”
I shrugged. “It could be worse, I guess.”
“Mm.” He tipped what was left of his second cocktail back, then glanced up when the server approached.
“One bill, gentlemen?”
Ever nodded. “Absolutely.” He looked back at me. “I’m going to head to the bathroom. But they have really decent to-go containers if you want to take the rest of your stuff home.”
I was unused to that, but it was probably a good idea, so I nodded and did my best not to stare at his pert ass as he walked away. I couldn’t quite pin this guy down on the sort of person he was, but goddamn, he was attractive.
