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The words were so shocking to Gabriel's ears that he almost dropped the teacup he had been holding in one hand while reading the newspaper in his other at the head of the dining table just as their father had once done when he had been earl.
As calmly as possible, Gabriel placed his teacup back on its saucer and took a moment to fold up his newspaper before he responded, "Are you certain it is what you want?"
He was more than a little relieved that his brother had chosen to make the announcement to him alone. He could only imagine how their mother might react to the news. Would she be pleased that Jonathan had finally found the woman to tame him or would she be displeased that after so long trying to get them to be seen as noblemen and not merely the mutts they were seen to be due to their heritage, he had chosen to marry an untitled woman?
Titles do not matter to any of us in this family,Gabriel reminded himself firmly. He knew deep down that his mother would never pay attention to any such foolish things, even if she had been growing more and more comfortable in English society of late. In fact, that very morning she was likely sipping tea with their grandmother, though he couldn't have said as he had not heard from her since her departure to the countryside.
"I am the most certain I have ever been," Jonathan assured him and Gabriel could tell from the look in his eyes that for once he whole-heartedly meant every word that he was saying. "I am in love, brother, be happy for me."
Jonathan leaned over from where he had been sitting at his brother's right hand and clapped him aggressively, yet affectionately, on the shoulder. But it was not the action that startled Gabriel, but the word he had used.Love,he realised, staring down at the half-eaten plate of eggs and bacon still sitting before him.That is what I have been feeling all of this time.
"And as an engagement gift, I have decided to give her the painting that she loved so dearly last night," Jonathan continued, clearly too caught up in his own happiness to see the realisation on his brother's face.
Clearing his throat, Gabriel attempted to return to the matter at hand, trying to force all thoughts of love for Miss Julia to the back of his mind. "You mean the painting thatyoubrought last night? Your own painting."
"Well, I couldn't very well go and give myself away, could I?" Jonathan chuckled, looking mighty pleased with himself. "Just imagine how all of my fans might have reacted if they had learned their most adored artist was actually in their midst!"
Gabriel rolled his eyes at his brother. He had always been big-headed and foolish when it came to his artwork, on the one hand being absolutely brilliant with it and on the other refusing to actually share it in a way that would give him any benefit.
Maybe this time it is different, he thought, wondering whether when he gifted it to her Jonathan might actually admit that it was in fact he who had painted such a likeness of her, and that it had not been any mere coincidence that her favourite artist just so happened to have painted a beauty as her.
"I suppose you are right," Gabriel conceded with a shrug before asking, "Though, are you absolutely certain you wish to marry? You have only known the woman for a few months."
"And yet I feel as though I have known her for a lifetime," Jonathan stated, sighing deeply with a dazed look upon his face that Gabriel had found in his own mirror of late whenever he was thinking of Miss Julia.
I am certain now that I am in love with her,Gabriel realised, struggling again to concentrate on his conversation with his brother.But could marriage possibly be the logical path to take?
He allowed himself to imagine standing at the head of the aisle, watching Miss Julia walk toward him with a veil covering her beautiful face, obscuring her magnificent blue eyes from view. The rush of anticipation that he felt was almost enough to knock him sideways, and Gabriel shoved the idea away.
Whether marriage was the logical path or not, he could not help but feel that there was still so much left for him to learn about Miss Julia before they eventually made it to the altar.
But you do hope that it will lead there,a small voice whispered in the back of his mind and he had to grit his teeth against it. He would not allow himself to grow hopeful of such things. After all, he may have been an earl with seemingly good marriage prospects, but he had no way of knowing how Miss Julia's family might react to learning of his intentions towards their daughter. For all he knew, her father might be one of the noblemen encouraging the gossip about him and his family.
Again, trying to distract himself, Gabriel turned to his brother and said, "I can only assume that you are bringing this to my attention because you wish for my blessing?"
The look on his brother's face suggested that perhaps his tone had been much harsher than he had intended for it to be, and he began to feel guilty. That was until Jonathan responded, “Yes, though if I have it or not, I shall still be proposing.”
The two brothers met each other’s gazes. It was agonising, to say the least, as Gabriel tried his hardest to come to terms with his brother's wishes. Never in a million years would he ever have guessed three years ago that he would one day be the head of the family, getting the final say on who his brother could or could not spend the rest of his life with.
And yet, here they were, and here he was knowing that his brother was a loose cannon and no matter what he said or did, Jonathan would find a way to get what he wanted as he always had.
Thinking back to the night before, Gabriel was unable to deny that there had been something between his brother and Miss Chelsea that had always intrigued him, something that somehow even made him a little jealous, perhaps because his brother was the younger and with far less responsibility, with no need to marry highly and keep the family line going as was the responsibility upon his shoulders.
Finally, with a deep and exasperated exhale, Gabriel conceded, "You have my blessing, brother."
Late that morning, with the knowledge of what his brother intended to do, Gabriel found himself wandering to the graveyard to visit their father's resting place. It was a visit he had made regularly at first, always kneeling before the grave to ask his father for guidance when he had been feeling utterly lost as the new Earl of Sutthers.
But the visits had become fewer and further between of late, perhaps because he was growing more used to his role or maybe even because he found himself less occupied with the past and finally looking towards his future.
But today he felt the need to be at his father's graveside, to stand rather than kneel in the snow, and to ask his father, "What am I to do? Is this truly the correct path for me?"
It was as he asked his late father that question that thoughts of Miss Julia invaded his mind once more and when he closed his eyes to picture his father standing before him to offer his advice; he found only her beautiful face smiling back at him.
"Is marriage the right thing?" Gabriel asked aloud, wondering now whether he was asking the advice of his father or the beautiful woman who would simply not leave his mind. She had become a permanent fixture in his psyche and whenever he was not around her physically, he found himself missing her so terribly that it was like a clawing at his heart.
Alone in the graveyard, surrounded by the dead and the snow, with the icy chill of winter all around him, Gabriel felt separate from the rest of the world and the longer he stood there, the clearer he was able to think. And yet all his thoughts always reverted back to her and all the joy he had felt sharing time with her. He could not help but think of how painful Christmas had been for him and his family of late, and yet this Christmas was far less so merely for having her at his side.
He thought of the fun and laughter they had shared at the skating party, dancing the early evening away upon the ice. He thought of how they had snuggled beneath the blanket on the sleigh the night before and how it had felt like the most natural thing in the world to simply lean in and place a grateful kiss on her cheek simply for making his world shine brighter when she was in it.
