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No, having him leave was best. At least for now in her mind. Having him stay with her and hang out together would have made it seem like they were in a relationship or dating. She wanted to keep it casual. Just dinner and sex.
Okay, even to her, that sounded bad. Like really bad.
But she couldn’t help it. The whole thought of dating someone or falling in love again scared the bejesus out of her. It wasn’t something she wanted. Hadn’t wanted it for a long time. She should have told him no when he had asked her out, but dammit, she just couldn’t seem to utter the freaking word. Not with the dreams that had been bombarding her and his daily stops for coffee and a bagel.
It was like she couldn’t get Mason out of her mind. Not when she dreamt about him all night and thought about him all day. So, she had given in and said yes, hoping that spending an evening with him would clear her mind of him. That he would somehow piss her off or make her see that he wasn’t all that and quickly lose interest. Sadly, that hadn’t happened. Her plan backfired in her face.
Their chemistry had been off the fucking charts. It was the craziest thing she had ever experienced. It was like they were made for one another.
Now, instead of the whole out-of-sight, out-of-mind thing, he was all she could think about. She wanted him more now than she had before their date, but she wouldn’t give in. She didn’t want that sort of life. The life where she was beholden to someone else. Where she was bound to care for a man again.
No matter what her friends had tried to tell her about finding the right man and having an equal footing in a relationship, she didn’t buy all that bullshit. Not for a minute. She would not bend over backward again for another man while she got diddly squat out of the relationship. It was precisely why she had chosen to stay true to herself and single. So she could have the life she wanted. Not what someone wanted from her.
Sam whined, seeming to pick up on her sudden mood change.
“It’s okay. I just have a lot on my mind. Human stuff. Relationship stuff that you wouldn’t understand.”
Sam whined again.
“I’ll be fine. I’m just trying to figure things out in my mind. It’s not a pretty conversation in there right now. You see, I met this guy … after having sworn off men forever. He kind of just snuck up on me, and I’ve been having these really crazy dreams about him. I feel like I’m losing my mind.”
Sam whined again and put his head on her lap, trying to comfort her.
“Aww. Aren’t you the sweetest thing?” She scratched his neck. “But if you are going to stay here, there are a few things we need to do.”
Sam cocked his head and looked at her. She tried not to laugh at his expression. It was almost as if he was trying to figure out what he had to do to stay with her.
“Don’t look at me like that. I can’t take you seriously when you do. Anyway, I’m going to need to call the vet and have her check to see if you’re microchipped or not. If you aren’t, we need to get you your shots, and discuss those dangly bits hanging from your backside.”
Sam hopped off the couch and barked at her.
“What? Did I offend you by saying that if you’re staying, you need to get your balls chopped off?” she laughed.
“Please. It’s not like you’re going to need them if you’re going to be a house dog. Besides, they say male dogs are better overall if they have them lobbed off.”
Sam let out a low growl.
“Fine. Fine. I’ll drop it. Now, get your ass back up here so I can snuggle you for a bit before I fall asleep, and you disappear to wherever it is you go.”
Jane tried to stay awake. Bless her heart, she really did, but the day had taken a toll on her, and now, the blackness began to pull her under.
EIGHTEEN
“How the hell did I get in here?” Jane asked as she woke to the sound of her alarm clock going off. The last thing she remembered was watchingAncient Alienswith Sam snuggled up on the couch next to her. She patted the bed, looking for Sam, but of course, he was nowhere to be found.
“I’m really going to have to set up a few cameras to see how this dog does his disappearing trick.” She thought as she climbed out of bed to get ready for work. Though it was Saturday, and she was tired as fuck, she still needed to get her ass to the bakery. Yulia would open, but she still needed to do the inventory and get her orders for the vendors ready for the next week.
Jane was on autopilot as she drove to work. Her mind was still overwhelmed with all things Mason. Images of their night together flooded her mind, making raw heat fill her core. How was she ever going to get him out of her mind if she couldn’t stop thinking about him?
It was a true conundrum.
“Hey, Jane,” Yulia called out as she walked through the front door.
“Good morning. Did I miss the rush?” she asked.
“It’s been pretty steady all morning, but we’ve got it. You look different today.” Yulia eyed her up and down.
Jane suddenly felt Amelia’s eyes turn toward her. As well as a few of the customers who were enjoying coffee and fresh donuts.
