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“Okay,” Sam grinned back. “Now, that ramen.”
Maddison laughed, dragging him out of the venue and into the late afternoon. Just in time for twilight, his favorite time of the day. Especially when he was with Sam. Because Sam glowed when it's twilight, like he belonged there, orange and pink and purple and blue and he was so beautiful, and Maddison was just so, so helplessly in love.
“Come on, Sammy,” he said when he found his voice, looking away from the beauty beside him. “I'll treat you to all-you-can-eat ramen because I'm awesome.”
Sam snorted, but it didn't make him less beautiful in Maddison's eyes. “Sure you are, Doll Face. Sure you are.”
Maddison couldn't remember how it began to crumble, everything around him.
Their freshman year went by fast. The volleyball team got into Nationals, but was defeated by a high school from another city after three rounds. Maddison was able to compete at all the art competitions but wasn't able to get to the most prestigious competition because he had chickenpox a week before the scheduled date and Maddison thought it was the most ridiculous thing to ever stop him from doing what he loved.
He and Sam stuck together after those falls, attached to the hips, mourning their loses for a few days, allowing themselves some sulking but they eventually got back to their feet like they always did. They were, after all, each other's strength and pillar.
But not for long, Maddison learned.
Sophomore year arrived and with it came Samuel Bailey's immense popularity. He was already declared Hillwood's ace, a very rare occurrence for a volleyball club as the ace is often a title saved for the third and fourth years. The team nominated him, however, and Sam had accepted it, humble and honored. The news broke, fast and school-wide, and girls and boys flocked to get the ace's attention. It made Sam adorable, flushed and stuttering, not used to the attention and affection other than Maddison's and his family's.
It should have made Maddison happy. He was proud of Sammy, he really was. But he couldn't always stomp the boiling jealousy he felt, the color so green it made the jades timid, every time a schoolmate pulled Sam to a spot behind their school building, handing him a love letter and a token, head bowed in shyness as they confessed their undying love for Samuel Bailey.
Sam always came back empty-handed, a scowl on his face. It never failed to make Maddison feel relieved.
“Why the frown, Sammy?” He asked one time, during lunch. Sam just got back from another confession. Maddison saw a cute girl looking for Sam just right after class so it must be that.
Said frown got deeper, and Sam grumbled beside him, shoving a piece of octopus sausage in his mouth. “It's always hard to reject them. It makes me feel bad.”
Maddison stared at the wide soccer field in front of them. “Why not just accept one of them, then?” He really just wanted to kick himself right then.
A pause. A flock of birds flew above them. Sam turned to him ever so slightly. “You think I should?”
Giving him his practiced smile, fake and awful, Maddison replied, “Why not? Sammy is so popular, girls and gays clamor for you. You should give them a chance too, you know?” Why was he doing this, saying this, he wanted to yell at himself. He was so stupid. Doll Face.
Sam looked down at his lunch box and hummed, as if considering. “Really?”
“Yes, Sammy. Really,” Maddison said, voice stable. Deep inside, he was cracking. “I guess your superb volleyball prowess makes up for your horrible face.”
“Say that again, Doll Face.” He saw Sam lifting his fork and threatened to stab him with it. Maddison laughed. This. At least he wouldn't lose this, right?
If he did, he wouldn't know what to do.
But Sam considered it. He actually considered Maddison's suggestion and Maddison was broken.
It was only the beginning.
Her name was Sato Ayako, a pretty Japanese-American girl in the same year as they were, but in a different class. She had hazel eyes and copper blonde hair, just a couple shades lighter than Maddison's. Maddison could tell she dyed it because her roots were black some days. She was in their cheerleading team, and that was how she and Sam had gotten close. She was the one who confessed though, and after a game, a very good game that Maddison watched to support his best friend, Sam went to find her amidst the celebration of their win and accepted her confession.
They kissed in the middle of the court and everyone cheered for them. Everyone except Maddison.
She was beautiful, of course she was. The cheerleading team didn't accept anyone that wasn't. Fair complexion, bright eyes, gentle voice. She was tall too, or at least tall enough that when Sam hugged her, he could rest his chin on top of her head. Maddison saw him doing that to her once.
It was convenient, really, their relationship. The ace of the volleyball team and the vice captain of the cheerleading squad were dating. A perfect match. The golden couple. They looked so in love.
Maddison hoped not.
He hadn't asked Sam about that yet, afraid of what he might say. Sam had never fallen in love before, as far as Maddison knew. Sammy would tell him if he had. He was so scared of this new development that he started distancing himself from Sam. Not like Sam really noticed. He was busy with his new girlfriend.
They haven't gone to school nor gone home together for weeks now. The usual sleepovers never happened. The texts dwindled down from every ten minutes of every day when they were not with each other to not even once at all. Maddison's paintings were filled with landscapes and other things that didn't include beautiful, intense green eyes and perfectly-tanned skins and gorgeous smiles.
It was hard. Maddison wouldn't allow himself to cry himself to sleep at night, but he was close to his breaking point. He wondered, if he didn't suggest it, if Sam would even be spending the night over at Sato's place tonight? He wondered if they would still be marathoning Maddison's stupid alien documentaries, snuggled in their silly blanket fort and chugging Dr. Pepper while pretending it's beer.
