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Jules ignored the flirtatious undertones in Nik’s words and answered his last question first. “Meg always keeps a private booth available at Keys for last-minute requests from high rollers. I asked her to hold it for me tonight.”
Keys, the piano bar at Harbourview, was a retro-style lounge that catered to an older crowd. The pianists they employed had a wide repertoire of music ranging from classical to current pop music, and Keys was popular on weekends. Because tonight was Valentine’s Day, the music was all love songs, playing quietly in the background as couples dined on a special menu. The lounge had been sold out weeks in advance, but Jules had counted on Meg having held back one or two tables. Valentine’s Day wasn’t the ideal night for this conversation, but Keys was a good location, offering privacy in a public space.
Jules swirled her wine in her glass as she willed the tightness in her chest to ease. The anxiety that had gripped her ever since Nik walked into her office was ballooning, her fears about telling him the truth looming over her.
“Tell me why you wanted to see me tonight. Are you still upset about what happened at the auction? Michael didn’t try to contact you again, did he?” The concern reflected in Nik’s eyes almost undid her. He barely knew her, and yet he’d gone out of his way to help her out of a terrible situation. Now she had to tell him something that would change his life forever.
“No, it’s not Michael. Or the auction. There is something I need to talk to you about, though.”
Nik relaxed back against the booth and nodded for her to continue.
Jules willed away the panic rising in her, trying to find exactly the right words. This was the most important conversation of her life. She had to get it just right. She could do this. She could. Nik wasn’t anything like Michael.
“Last night you heard a bit about my disaster of a marriage, and about my daughter. After the divorce, finding out I was pregnant was a surprise, but a welcome one. Ava is my world. I told you that her father isn’t part of our lives, which is true. He wasn’t around when I found out I was pregnant, and tracking him down was impossible.” Jules paused, the weight in her chest making it difficult to speak.
“Is there something you think I can do to help with that? Do you need financial assistance to help track him down?” Nik’s look of confusion made it clear she was bumbling the conversation.
Jules gripped her wineglass, using the ruby liquid as a focal point. She willed her muscles to unclench and tried to breathe through the building anxiety. Would he understand that she’d meant no harm? “No, but I wanted you to understand why her father wasn’t around. I never intentionally kept her a secret. I just didn’t know how to find you.”
Jules kept her eyes locked on Nik, waiting for him to process her words and realize what she was saying.
“You’re telling me I’m Ava’s father?” A deep frown pulled down the corners of Nik’s mouth, making him look severe and forbidding. Disbelief and a hint of anger edged his voice. He took a long swallow from his drink, then banged the glass down on the table.
Inhaling deeply, Jules nodded. Pushing past her panic, she forced herself to keep talking. “Ava will turn four next month. You are the only man I slept with after I left Michael. And I haven’t been with anyone else since you.” As soon as those words left her mouth, she wanted to pull them back. He didn’t need to know that. They added to her fear as she waited for Nik to respond. The sense of relief she had hoped for was nowhere to be found. All she felt was dread.
Nik was shaking his head. “Not possible. We used protection. There is no way she’s my child.”
Jules forced herself to continue. “I don’t expect you to take my word for it. We’ll do a paternity test. I will also sign any paperwork you want to protect you financially. I’m not after your money. But you are her father, and you deserve to know that. You deserve to have a chance to know her, to have a relationship with her. I never intended to keep her from you, but I didn’t even know your name, Nik. I had no way to tell you about her.”
The stress and fear that had been dogging her all day started to fade, replaced by a hint of relief. Even if Nik didn’t want anything to do with Ava, at least he knew the truth. With a shaking hand, Jules fumbled for her phone. Once she found what she wanted, she set it on the table and pushed it towards Nik, a picture of Ava on the screen.
Nik picked up the phone, staring intently at the little girl. It was a holiday photo, taken in front of a half-decorated Christmas tree. The little girl was grinning at the camera, wearing sparkling garland in ropes around her neck. She was a miniature version of Jules, with pale-blonde hair and fair skin, but her eyes ...
He scrolled to another photo, this one a close-up of her face. The dark eyes shining from the image were the same eyes he saw in the mirror every morning. Brown so dark they looked black, with a ring of gold right around the pupil and a circle of black on the outer edges. And her nose was showing signs that it would lengthen into the same aquiline shape as his. His dark colouring could make his eyes look fierce and intimidating, but all he saw coming from Jules’s daughter was happiness. Jules’s daughter.Hisdaughter.
He was a father? Nik took another long swallow of the scotch he’d ordered, trying to mask his shock. The last time he’d felt like this, he’d taken a body check from a defenceman that had left him with a concussion and a busted knee, ending his hopes of playing pro hockey. He picked up the phone again and looked closely at the photo, trying to absorb the idea that this little girl might actually be his. And Jules was her mother. The woman whose memory had haunted his dreams for years.
“She has my eyes.”
“Yes.” Jules bit her lip, and her throat rippled as she swallowed. Nik wanted to lean over and smooth away the worry lines carved on her face. How hard had her life been, raising a child on her own? That ended now.
“I believe you. She’s my daughter. But I want to make sure no one else questions it, that someone like Michael can never use this against you. I’ll contact my legal team and do whatever is necessary for the paternity test. Then there will be no doubt.” The possibility of Michael, or any man, trying to lay claim to his child infuriated him. There was also his father, who could try to cause trouble. A paternity test would quash any accusations directed at Jules.
Relief flashed in her eyes before the mask of composure Jules used as armour slipped back into place. “Thank you.” She glanced away, and the silence stretched between them as Nik waited for her to say something else. When it became clear she was waiting for him to take the lead, he plunged ahead with the questions rioting through his mind.
“Tell me about her?” He knew almost nothing about preschool children. Nik had grown up with a large extended family, but it had been several years since he’d spent any time with them or their children. “What does she like? Who looks after her when you’re at work? Does she go to preschool? Does she like sports? Music?”
Jules laughed and held up her hand to stop the flow of words. “Ava is curious about everything. She already knows the alphabet and is learning to read some simple words. She loves books. She loves music and being outdoors. We take her camping and walking along the seawall, and to the beach frequently. We haven’t registered her in organized sports yet, but she’s taken swimming lessons and skating lessons, and had fun doing both. She’s trying out gymnastics and dance right now. She wants to try everything.” Her movements were animated as she talked about Ava, her eyes glowing.
Jules’s adoration of her daughter pulled at something deep inside him. What would he need to do for her to look at him like that? “You saidwetake her camping. Who goes with you? Do you have a nanny?”
Nik fought to keep any hint of jealousy out of his voice. Had Jules dated someone that she had introduced Ava to? Jules had said there was no one else, but the idea of anyone else touching her, loving her, aroused a jealousy he wasn’t proud of. Not that it mattered now. Ava’s existence changed everything. Nik would not risk a future where another man could come between him, his daughter, and Jules.
Nik considered other options. It could be a nanny. To allow her to do her job effectively, Jules had to have some type of childcare that didn’t operate on standard hours. Nannies were expensive, but maybe Jules had family money he didn’t know about. Maybe that was why she started this conversation talking about not wanting his money.
Jules looked nervous, and Nik mentally berated himself for upsetting her. It had been a difficult night for both of them, and he didn’t need to add to her stress. “I do have a part-time nanny for Ava, but when I saidwe, I meant my mother and I. My mother lives with us and takes care of Ava on her days off. She’s a part-time engineering instructor at one of the colleges here. After I found out I was pregnant, we pooled our resources and bought a house in a neighbourhood with good schools. I was living in a one-bedroom apartment after my divorce, and Mom had a small condo. We combined our savings and bought the house. It’s worked out well, and it’s allowed Ava to grow up with a dog, and friends nearby, and her grandmother as a key person in her life. It would have been impossible for me to afford the house otherwise. My divorce settlement wasn’t generous.” Her mouth turned down at the corners, swiftly replaced with a tight smile.
The life Jules described sounded idyllic, perfect for raising a child, if not overly lavish. Nik wondered how much of an issue money was for Jules. Not that it mattered. He’d make sure they never had to worry about money again.
