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Tonight was the night I’d already talked to our server ahead of time, and everything was ready. A surprisingly low number of knots tightened my abdomen, but I took it as a good sign. Stroking Katie’s hand under the table, I pursed my lips thinly as I scanned the menu.
Hopefully, she didn’t hit me or something from shock or happiness or surprise. I expected at least one punch to the arm, just to be realistic.
“So, what should we order for dessert? The strawberry cheesecake looks phenomenal.” My heart rate jacked up at Katie’s question, and I tensed as my gaze flickered to the entryway to the kitchens. She was allergic to chocolate, so the cheesecake was the next best idea, and a cold sweat broke out on my back. The nerves that I’d naively thought would stay mild slammed into my gut when our server appeared with a whole cake, and my throat tightened to block my breath.
“I’m thinking of getting a—” My mom’s input was cut off by the waitress’s appearance, and goosebumps washed my entire body. Everything moved in slow-motion as Katie straightened and the waitress smiled brightly as she set the cake down. The edge of the cheesecake was drenched in strawberry syrup, but the middle was clean but for elegant script and a single ornament in the middle.
The silence was deafening, and those five words that I’d practiced over and over again for days caught behind the dense lump in my throat. Turning to Katie to find her turning beet red around wide blue eyes, I grabbed her hand to hold it to my chest. My heart made a bid to smash through my ribs, and my brain jolted into action when her sparkling gaze met mine. Desperation dried my mouth, and I opened my mouth dumbly before managing to squeeze out just one word.
“Please.” The rasp was all I managed, but the cheesecake pretty much asked my question for me. Watching through tight pupils as Katie gaped, I beat down the blood drumming in my ears as expectation swept through me. “Please?”
This is a disaster. There’s no way she’ll say y—
“Yes.” Tensing at her breathless whisper, I blinked hard, and Katie gulped harshly to jerk her head in a nod. “Yeah, yes, I w–will. Of course, I will.”
Delirious happiness fogged my mind, and I reached to cup Katie’s burning face and tighten my grip on her trembling fingers. Letting out a wheeze of a laugh, I tore my gaze off her to snatch the ring off its wax paper seat, and it sparkled brilliantly in triumph. The diamond was small, the design elegant and modern, and her eyes boggled slightly. Sucking in a sharp breath that stole the heat from my body, her lips quivered as I lifted her left hand.
Our fingers shook to the point that it was difficult to get the ring on, but Katie’s half-sob, half-laugh rang out loudly when I finally managed. Blinking back her tears, she smiled a watery smile, and I inhaled a shuddering breath as claps and cheers and faces slowly wiggled into my scope of comprehension.
“Will you marry me, Katie?” Blurting out the question, fire licked my cheeks as prickles assaulted my spine, but Katie laughed with a firm nod. Grinning madly, I grabbed the back of her head to pull her mouth to mine, and she giggled a little hysterically into our kiss.
“Yes!” Hugging her tightly, I inhaled as deeply as I could, and Katie’s well-manicured nails dug into my upper back. Her voice dropped, a bare collection of sounds only loud enough for me to hear, and I reveled in her hoarseness. “I will marry you, Brandon. How long were you planning this?”
“A week. I didn’t think I’d mess up so badly.” She didn’t laugh at my confession, only tightening her arms around me, and I buried my face in her neck to sigh in pure bliss. “I’m so glad you said ‘yes’, Katie.”
“You’re such a dummy. Your messing up is part of the reason I love you.” My heart stopped at her whisper, and she sniffled into my shoulder before croaking softly, “It was perfect.”
“I love you, too, Katie.” Closing my eyes, I struggled not to pass out from the sheer intensity of the maelstrom swirling in my chest, and Katie made this long, squeaky sound that jumpstarted my heart again. “I’m gonna take you away..."
“D–don’t say that. I think... I think I’m going to be sick.” Leaning back as Katie shuddered delicately, I couldn’t help but laugh when she scrunched up her face. “I hate planes.”
“We’ll take a boat.” Caressing her cheek, my grin widened at the playful glare Katie shot me, and she gave a shaky sigh. The world beyond us started to seep into my peripheral vision, and I glanced over to find my mom smiling broadly. Caroline had tears in her eyes, and my chest puffed out like a bird that’d just left the nest. Grabbing Katie’s hand under the table, I squeezed tightly, and her little giggle tickled my ears as the still cold band seared my fingers.
The short, heavy silence ended when Caroline gave a choking laugh, and I stiffened when she half-jumped across the table. Her thin arms held me with all their strength, and I sucked in a sharp breath tinged with discomfort. Even so, an incredible happiness surged through my veins, and she made another harsh sound as I patted her back awkwardly.
“Thank you for fixing her heart.” Caroline’s soft rasp was barely discernible, and I cleared my throat when she leaned back. Any hope I had that she’d sit down was squashed when she held my face in both of her hands and her tears ran in earnest down her face. “I know that my husband would approve of you, Brandon.”
“M–Mom..." Watery blue eyes widened, and Caroline pulled back sharply at Katie’s wavering call. Glancing over, I pursed my lips at her sudden paleness, and she released my hand to rub her palms together furiously. “Can... can we not talk about Dadright now?”
“What? Why?” Gingerly wiping her face, Caroline threw back her shoulders, and Katie’s cheeks almost became translucent while I watched uselessly. The anxiety of just seconds ago returned with a viciousness to gnaw at my gut, and I glanced between the two through narrowed eyes. “I know what I’m talking about, Katie. You were too young to remember, but—”
“I wasn’t too young to remember him dangling from the ceiling fan.” Frigid and sharp, Katie’s snap dropped the temperature by a coupledozendegrees, and goosebumps washed my skin. Flexing my hands into tight fists as she visibly shored herself up, I reached out only to freeze solid at her withering glare. “Don’t. Okay, I... I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
Disappearing into the frosty mist she’d created, Katie took the atmosphere with her, and I breathed a harsh breath. Rubbing my chest to staunch the throb, I cleared my throat roughly as I watched her weave through the tables. Her slender, dark red dress swayed ever so slightly around her calves, and her perfectly curled raven hair swished with her gait.
“I’m sorry. Katie has a hard time talking about her father. Sometimes, I feel like that memory is all she has of him.” Turning to Caroline as my own mom rubbed her shoulder soothingly, I couldn’t help the stab of pity that pierced my chest at her sad smile. “I don’t mean to ruin the mood, but Tom was the kind of man who worked a job he hated to give her a good life. He was honorable, though sometimes oblivious. ButKatie doesn’t remember the good parts. Sometimes, I worry that she doesn’t remember anything about him but that.”
ChapterSixteen
KATERINA
What if my mom is right?Actually, I knew my mother was right because my mom was never wrong. She was my mom. Shecouldn’tbe wrong. Gnawing on my bottom lip diligently, I grazed my thumb over the setting of the surprisingly modest ring on my finger over and over and over again. We sat, parked, in front of Brandon’s house for a few minutes, at least, but I was in no particular hurry to get out of the limo.
“Do you want to talk about it, Katie?” Tearing my eyes off the abyss of the tinted window, I offered a faltering smile as Brandon slid and shuffled to sit hip to hip with me. His warmth suffused my very bones, and I sighed heavily as he wrapped his arms around me to press his cheek against my crown. “I’m not trying to diminish what you went through, but you’re lucky, you know? Your father loved you. If my dad were alive, he would’ve seen me as an object. Everything was purely money and advantage to him. So, I’m not saying—”
“I know you’re not, Brandon. That’s not it.” My voice gyrated against my throat roughly, and I nuzzled his chest as a sick kind of irony seeped into my brain. “What if I’m wrong? What if my mom is right about my dad? What if everything I’ve ever done is for nothing, based on the contorted notion that I have about a man I didn’t even really know?”
“Katie... I don’t know how to put this, but... your father doesn’t exist anymore. When a person dies, everything we know about them has no more potential. Eventually, even your memories of him will die. The things your dad wanted and aspired for you died a long time ago, Katie. I mean... look at me. I did what I was born to do, followed in my father’s footsteps, and planned my life out based on his book, but it turned me into a person I didn’t recognize. I’m not saying it’s the same, but... at what point do we stop being controlled by the ghosts we create?”
