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“You’re a pussy, and you’re the bitchiest, most selfish, holier-than-thou, sheltered asshole I’ve ever met. It’s fucking annoying to the extreme that we are all stuck on this island with you. Oh, woe is you— you have it so hard— you lord over everyone because anything you don’t like isn’t allowed. You get upset when the answers aren’t what you want them to be. You cry over shit thatyoucaused because you’re a coddled, little prick, so used to stomping your foot to get what you want. You throw tantrums when you’ve done nothing but prove you’re a failure—oh, but you try!
“I came here because Katie became my patient. I’m not your fucking therapist or your go-between. I try damned hard to make sure that baby doesn’t die because it’s my job. And so far, I’ve stayed out of it for the most part, and the disgusting amount of money you threw at me made coming here worth it. If you wanna complain to someone about your marriage failing over shit you don’t want to resolve, go to a bar. I’m done trying to give you advice because you don’t listen to anything that makes you uncomfortable or seems kinda hard. She went from being a bright, bubbly, okay-considering-the-circumstances person when we got here to an empty fucking husk, and it’s because ofyou. Did you ever consider thatyou’rethe fucking common denominator, Brandon? Did you ever think no one wants to be your fucking friend because you’re insufferable, and infantile, and entitled? This whole time on this island has proven that you can’t even pay people enough to be your friends.” Julia huffed loudly, physically recomposing herself as I stared, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Smoothing her shirt, she pulled her hair back and straightened her shoulders before speaking up again. Her eyes were hard, not kind and understanding as I’d come to know them. “Go ahead and wallow in your misery that things aren’t good and sunshine and rainbows. Don’t try to fix things, just hope they fix themselves. Be that man who feels so sorry for himself and goes to everyone else to feel better. But don’t you ever,everblame anyone but yourself when you’re standing over Katie and your baby’s dead bodies in a morgue. It’syourfault.Youdon’t want to put inrealeffort and try to change or accept the nastier side of life.
“And another thing... don’t come crying to me anymore. I’ll be Katie’s doctor, and I’ll give her my best care because I took an Oath. But I’m not your mother, and I’m done babying you. At least when Katie comes crying to me, she either admits she needs my help and accepts my advice, or she states she doesn’t want it and just wants to vent.” Julia went to walk out, but the phone trilled shrilly on the hook, and I had an outer body experience as I watched her pick it up. “Hello? It’s for you.”
I watched my own body stand up as if I were floating outside it, and I couldn’t feel the floor beneath my feet. The phone was soft in my hand, as if the plastic would just melt despite the fact that it wasn’t hot. Leaving the room in a fury, Julia left the door open as I leaned against the wall.
“Brandon!” Bert’s soft hiss sucked my mind back into myself, and I blinked hard as his harsh, wheezing pants slithered to wrap around my brain. “Brandon! You gotta help me!”
“Why?” My voice sounded like it was coming through a tunnel, and I sniffled harshly as stunned silence rang in my ears. “We had a deal. Why would I help you when you broke it? One step out of line... and you took three or four.”
“You dumbass— you would, too, if someone was holding a gun to your head!” Berthold’s furious whisper sputtered a little as he tried to breathe, and I frowned under furrowed brows. “I’m not gonna die for you, Brandon, but you better fucking help me, or this guy is gonna kill me!”
“Call the police if you’re that concerned.” A horrid, coughing scoff filtered through the line, and I rubbed my face with my free hand. “Why are you calling for help when you let the guy in? Just remove your access and step down.”
“Yeah, I’ll do that— and then this guy will catch me, shoot me, and run rampant and burn the building to the ground with everyone in it!”
My lip curled at that as a strange emptiness engulfed my mind, and Bert’s snarky tone stuck my brain like pin needles.
“Jesus, Brandon! You’d think considering all the guilt you felt over the Steele incident that you wouldn’t want another death on your hands!”
“Katie’s father hasnothingto do with this, and even if he did, you’re the one who handled the deal! Stop trying to make it out like signing that contractunder your assurancesplaces the blame entirely on me! I didn’t go into it intentionally intending to fuck him over! I didn’t change the terms at the last minute! I didn’t lie to my boss that the changes had been approved, and I sure as fuck wasn’t the one who said that restitution was out of the question because it’d mean admitting fault!” My shouting seemed to fill the whole room, and I flung out my arm as my brain threatened to melt out of my ears. “You were the one that dideverythingin that deal, Bert, and yeah— I signed the paper, and accept my guilt over it, but don’t you fuckingdareact like you didn’t orchestrate Katie’s father’s death! Mason should fucking kill you, you waste of fucking space and energy! And as for having another death on my hands, you deserve whatever the most fucked up way Mason can think of, and I sure as shit won’t feel guilty for believing that wholeheartedly!
“If you think I’m going to save you or my company, you’re gonna be sorely disappointed.Katieandmy babyare my priority, so lock yourself out of the system, call the police... or don’t. I don’t fucking care anymore.” I slammed the phone on the wall hook before my knees gave out from under me. Shivering with rage that filled my vacant spaces, I breathed hard and fast as I pushed the butts of my palms into my eye sockets.
That’s right.If I could just... be better, Katie would live, and we’d have a chance to fix things. No one else matters. Not Bert, not Nathan, not Julia. In my frazzled brain, everything suddenly made sense, and an overwhelming sense of foolishness clogged my throat and nose.
“That’s impossible.” A little blubber of a self-depreciating laugh escaped me on the tail of my murmur, and I sat back on my heels to flop my head back and take a deep, stabilizing breath.Accept the nastier side of life.“At least you’re good for something, Bert. The company may be your everything, but it’s not mine.”
ChapterFifteen
KATIE
“Here.” Holding out a glass of tea for me, Brandon smiled broadly as he gazed out over the beautiful, blue ocean. Off the coast of some paradise, the sun was bright and warm, and he wrapped his free arm around my waist to pull me close. “I would love to live like this.”
“So would I.” Tilting my head, I puckered my lips, and Brandon chuckled softly before leaning over. His kiss was cathartic, and I gasped when he tightened his arm around my waist. Setting my glass down blindly, I pushed Brandon back onto a lounge, and need swarmed my body. I straddled his waist, and greedy hands squeezed my hips as I ducked to kiss him.
“I love you, Brandon.” Mumbling softly against his jaw, delight skittered up my spine when he flipped us over.
“Katie! Wake up!”
My eyelids fluttered open, and I inhaled a shaky breath as Nathan stared down at me. When I tried to move, it waspainfullyobvious the position we were in, and he very slowly and deliberately released my forearms from above my head.
“Relax. You were just dreaming.”
“What happened?” My slur dried my mouth, and Nathan put a hand on my knee before I realized my legs were wrapped around him. Horror sucked the heat from my body as I practically kicked him away, and I pulled my knees to hug myself tightly.
Holding up his hands, my own reached to cover my eyes in shame, but he didn’t seem at all uncomfortable when he spoke up.
“You were sleep walking, or you would’ve been if you got far. I tried to get you back in bed, but I assume you started dreaming about Brandon.”
A huge hole opened up my chest as I covered my mouth in shock and disgust, but Nathan put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed comfortingly.
“No harm, no foul. But...”
“I amso sorry, Nathan. I guess... the stress is starting to get to me. What time is it?” I couldn’t even look Nathan in the face, and I ran both my hands through my hair a few times as I struggled to breathe. “We’re gonna leave soon... that’s probably... I hate planes, and I’m really— I’m so sorry.”
“You’ve got nothing to apologize for, Katie. I was gonna say that you’re really not okay. You’re barely eating. You’re barely sleeping. You can’t keep this up.”
