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“I don’t have any other choice.” She folded her arms across her chest, feeling defeated. “But if you’re going to sell me out, I can’t stop you.”
“I’m not.” Cato sighed. “Your secret’s safe with me, Inota.”
“Seriously?”
“I figure I owe you one.” A half-smile. “I’ll even keep calling you Kaya.”
“Oh, don’t start.”
“Of all the aliases you could’ve chosen, you picked the one you used whenever we teamed up? I knew you were sentimental.”
“I picked it at random.”
“Sure you did.”
“Thank you, Cato.” She took a breath, realized how dangerously close to tears she was. It had been a long, stressful day on top of a long, stressful week… with a long, stressful life behind it.
“Don’t mention it. But—I’m going to get on my soapbox for a minute, forgive me. These are good people, okay?”
She gritted her teeth. “I know. I’m trying to get out of here while doing as little damage as possible.”
“That’s not what I meant. I mean… consider the option of trusting them. Telling them the truth. The actual truth, not the carefully curated version of it I heard in the Throne Room.”
“Evenyoudon’t know the actual truth about me.”
“I know. And how’s that going, as a strategy? Building a life you love?”
“Likeyou’vebeen totally honest with these people,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “Like you’ve told them all the shit Haspar made us do—”
“I have,” he said quietly, and the look on his face told her he meant it. Surprise stopped her from retorting. “All of it. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t be here right now. I know what you’re like when you’re cornered. I mean—think about how much power I have over you because of all these secrets. Imagine how much safer you’d feel if they knew everything already.”
“If they knew everything, I wouldn’t be here,” she said, her voice sounding hollow in her ears. But Cato only shrugged.
“They know everything about me, and I’m still here. Redemption’s a powerful thing.” Cato shrugged. “You’re gonna do what you’re gonna do. But I thought I’d just—make a case fornotabandoning everything you’ve ever known.”
And then he was gone, leaving her curled in a ball in the armchair and feeling somehow more lost and confused than she had before he’d come. Knowing that he wasn’t going to sell her out to the Queen and her court should have left her feeling reassured. Cato had been the last major obstacle to her escape.
So why did she feel worse now about the plan than she ever had before?
Chapter 23 - Callan
Being back in his own quarters was perhaps the strangest part of an already deeply strange day. Callan had hoped that Kaya might stay with him at first… but that had been before the revelation in front of the Court that, yet again, she’d been keeping her thoughts from him. He wasn’t sure why he was so surprised, why the hurt still felt fresh. Hadn’t she been doing this all along? Hadn’t she always had her own motivations? She’d said she was going to do her best to trust him, that was what he kept coming back to. Had that been a lie? Or was her best just not very good?
It would have been nice to talk about it with her, at any rate. But something had told him, when she’d been escorted off to her quarters, that it would be best for him to keep his distance. He hadn’t explicitly said so, but it was clear to him that the dragons of the Court had come to the conclusion that he and Kaya were soulmates. Why else would the Queen have asked if he intended to go with her to the other world? It was a good thing he’d stopped himself from responding to that question, he thought, tossing and turning restlessly in his little bed. It would have been embarrassing to declare that he’d follow her everywhere, only to be undercut by her apparent confusion at the question.
That, more than anything, was what was bothering him. She wouldn’t ask that of him? What kind of a response was that? Bad enough that she wanted to leave this world behind completely, worse still that she hadn’t told him that that was her plan… but to be willing to leave him behind, too? If he’d been in her place, knowing that if he went somewhere he wouldn’t be coming back, the first thing he’d have done would have been to ask her to go with him.
But she hadn’t asked, had she? He wasn’t invited on this one-way trip she was planning. Was she really going to leave him behind? They were soulmates. He just couldn’t understand it. What kind of shifter would be able to face that prospect? Leaving the life he’d built here behind was one thing, and yes, he had to admit he didn’t relish the prospect, but he’d still rather die than be without her for the rest of his life.
It was a testament to how tired he was that he was able to find his way into a restless sleep despite his racing thoughts. In his dreams, he had a sword in his hand and a burning anger in his heart, and he slashed through countless waves of blurry-faced enemies, moving slowly down hallways that were sometimes in the Palace, sometimes in Brisant, but always full of danger. He was breathing hard when he woke to a brisk knocking on the door to his quarters, and as the dream gave way to reality, his last confused thought was that every single enemy he’d defeated had been Kaya.
He stumbled for the door, grateful for the distraction from that chilling thought. An urgent summons from the Palace, delivered by a worried-looking guard. Had the Queen made her decision? Was he about to find out if Kaya was going to be leaving them for good? But when he raced into the Throne Room, Kaya wasn’t there. Neither were many of the usual councilors and assembled audience—the usually crowded room was all but empty. Queen Lana and Alpha Seth were waiting for him, with Captain Acantha and—to his surprise—Cato. The mage tended to keep late-night hours, which made his appearance at this early-morning hearing an unusual one.
“Good morning, Callan. Thanks for coming so quickly. Join us,” the Queen said, flicking a hand. It felt deeply strange to move from his accustomed position standing to attention before the Court, but he approached the long table cautiously, taking the offered seat with apprehension building in him. What was going on? The Queen was holding a piece of parchment with a familiar seal on the back of it, and he felt his heart skip a beat.
“You recognize the seal, then,” Cato said drily. The mage looked tired but alert. “The Guild works faster than I’d thought.”
“When did this arrive?”
