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He forced a smile. So did I. But I couldn’t hold it for long and neither could he.
“But it doesn’t feel like home. Not as much,” he finally said.
“Why not?”
He shrugged. “A lot of things are broken, like the cabinets and some of the lights. Our stuff is all in boxes. The floors creek when I step on them sometimes,” he said. “The walls are a funny color. It makes them feel like they’re closing in on me.”
“All that stuff can be fixed.”
“Yeah, but… it just feels different.”
I nodded. Desmond’s house was open and airy. It got a lot of sunlight and it had a huge kitchen and living room. Not to mention, it had the comfortable lived-in feeling of a family who had been there for many years. It was the only home Rex had ever known. It was the place I’d lived the longest too, aside from my parents’ home. Tears welled in the corners of my eyes and my heart broke, not only for my son, but for myself. I don’t think I’d grieved the loss of my home either.
I tried to shake off the tears before Rex noticed them, but he did anyway.
“I didn’t mean to make you cry, Mom,” he said.
“You didn’t, honey. This isn’t your fault.”
“There are some things I like about the new condo,” he continued. “I like the big TV and I like the flowers out front.”
I sniffled. “That’s nice, Rex. I’m really glad for that.”
“And I like that I have a friend next door.”
“Huh?”
“Carter. He’s my friend.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t sure what to say to that.
“Maybe he could come over for dinner some time. Or we could play pinball again.”
“Um… sure. Maybe.”
I pulled myself together and made it to Rex’s school just in time for the bell to ring. I kissed his cheek and handed him his backpack before watching him head off inside with the other kids. I made a silent vow to do better by him. To fix up the condo and make it feel more like a home. To keep his life as normal and happy as possible. He deserved that.
I also resolved to invite Carter over for dinner. I would go a long way to make Rex happy.
Which meant I had to figure out how to spend an evening with him andnotpicture him naked the entire time.
Seventeen
Carter
I checked out the window for Zoe’s car. Again. I’d done that an embarrassing amount of times today.
It was rare that I had a day off in the middle of the week, but there were no jobs scheduled and when I went into the office, there was nothing to do but annoy Elias. And that got dull pretty quickly, so I went home. I tried to watch TV, but there was nothing on. I texted Kieran, hoping he was around.
Carter: What are you doing today?
Kieran: Nothing.
Carter: Want to do something then? I’m bored as fuck over here.
Kieran: Can’t.
Carter: Why not? You said you weren’t doing anything?
