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"I can imagine. Albert has taken to hiding from us since the accident. I wonder why." Her keen eyes searched Edwina’s expression for answers.
"I am sure you are not here to discuss our host's absence,My Lady," Edwina said, contriving to not allow the woman’s very casual use of his Christian name to bother her.
Albert and Lady Stenton appeared to be good friends and Edwina was jealous. Especially now that their relationship was in a rut. Maybe a relationship no longer even existed between them.
"You are right,” the Dowager Countess chuckled. "I am here to see how you are faring. But I confess it is mostly because I wish to create a good image for myself in the eyes of the future Duchess of Rowan."
"I compliment your honesty, My Lady," Edwina said.
"I shall take that as a compliment." She smiled. The smile that caused Edwina to wonder as she had the night she found her and Albert in the library, how she could possibly compete with the likes of her.
But her reference to Edwina as a future Duchess made her stomach turn. Since the incident, even the most banal of comments about her engagement reminded her of her treachery and how miserable she was.
"Oh dear, I know that look," Lady Stenton observed, and Edwina gave her a confused look.
“I beg your pardon?”
"He is a very conflicted man,” she explained, “and his behavior tends to prevent people from getting close to him. You are fighting, are you not?"
"No, we are not,” she said. It was partly true. “Sometimes, it is the people around him that are conflicted, not him." Lady Stenton frowned but before she could say anything, Edwina suddenly asked without thinking, "How does it feel?"
"How does what feel?" Lady Stenton appeared to be quite confused now.
"Freedom. How does it feel to live beyond society’s constraints?"
However much Edwina told herself that she did not care about society’s conventions, the wish to appear respectable warred with her desire for freedom. Expectation loomed over her like a damning shadow. The desire for respectability made her seek a husband but her wish for freedom was stronger.
"I would be lying if I told you that it does not feel good," Lady Stenton replied. "I am not living above society’s rules, however. For example, I might have any man I wish, but I must either keep my affairs hidden or remarry. Nothing is without a cost."
"Rules suffocate me," she confessed.
“Likewise. The secret is to live between them. Find a balance and maintain it.” When she smiled at Edwina, she felt her jealousy dissolve. She seemed like a good person and it was not right to dislike her because a man was between them.
Edwina considered her words for a few seconds before saying, "I have no accomplishments, but I love paintings. I like to think that our lives are like paintings. Taking from what you said, if the colors are not balanced, then the quality of the painting could be poor."
Lady Stenton’s brows rose. “Such a philosophical way to view it. But yes, that is exactly what I mean.” She placed a hand on Edwina’s. “I like you and I hope that we can be friends. There is nothing anymore between Albert and me.”
“Just so,” Edwina murmured.
"And I must insist you call me Nora."
Edwina smiled, feeling the last of her reservation melt away. She was not going to marry Albert and she could use more friends. "You are not bad company, Nora."
Nora laughed. “Oh, I am certainly not. You will find that we have more in common than we have differences. I must go now but I promise to return later.”
Shortly after Nora’s departure, Kitty returned with lovely flowers in her arms. "I collected this from the maid sent with it on my way back," she announced. "They are for you."
The sight of the blooms stoked the embers of hope within Edwina, and she quickly reached for the card attached. She found it and read the words:
I should like my name at the top of your dance card, Lady Edwina. This means that I wish to see you strong and on your feet again.
With warmest regards,
Your future cousin.
"Steven," Edwina murmured, disappointed it was not from the man she had been hoping it to be from. But then she was reminded of what she needed to do to mend what she had broken. Bracing her cane on the carpeted floor, she started to rise.
“Where are you going?” Kitty asked.
