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Maybe it’s the near-death experience that loosens my tongue, or maybe it’s because I’ve drunk half a bottle of vodka, but I find that I have to confide in my brother or else something else is about to get smashed.
“It’s the girl,” I grind out, glaring at my reflection in the glass. “She’s bad luck. Ever since she came into my life, everything’s gone up in flames.”
The silence echoes. It’s so loud that my shoulders clench when the groan of an armchair interrupts it.
There’s a clatter of metal on wood, then heavy footsteps move away from me.
“Then take her out of it,” Gabe says quietly.
The door slams shut behind him.
I don’t want to turn around because I know what I’ll find, but tonight I’ve been confronted with all the truths. So, fuck it; what’s one more?
Gabe’s half-smoked cigar rests easily in an ashtray. Next to it lies a gun, a silencer screwed onto the end of it.
The calm before the storm always holds a certain charm. Outside, the waters are at peace, gently rocking the boat to sleep. The moonlight pours through all the portholes and glints off the chrome surfaces in the kitchen.
The digital clock on the oven glows. I was only meant to be passing through, but somehow, hours have passed and I’m still here, palms braced on the counter.
I’ve smoked seven cigarettes and I can’t smoke another.
I swipe up the whiskey glass and bring it to my lips. The bitter smell under my nose gives me pause, but then I slam it in one go. The heat fizzles in my chest until a hollowness forms there. I have an awful feeling it’s going to be permanent.
I didn’t even want the fucking whiskey. I only drank it because I knew once I did, I couldn’t turn back.
The knife makes a menacingswishwhen I drag it off the counter. It’s only a paring knife, anything larger would be noticeable, and I can’t bear the thought of her being scared in her final seconds. Gabe’s gun, even with the silencer, was out of the question for the same reason.
Too much liquor gives me a tremble in my knees as I make my way out of the galley and into my private chambers. The squeeze in my chest has nothing to do with my vodka-whiskey mix and everything to do with her.
Fate fucked me. She assigned the Queen of Hearts as my doom card then sent me a girl I’d never be able to resist. Not only have I let her into my life, I’ve let her under my skin. She crawls inside me now, does stupid shit to my heart, the shit people make songs and movies about.
But there’s no sunshine and rainbows in this story, only losses and near-death experiences.
I can’t keep her and I can’t let her go.
Turning into the corridor, I see the orange glow seeping out from under my cabin door, and unease fills my stomach like cement. Fuck, although I knew she’d be awake—she still only sleeps in my car—the reality of it makes me nauseous.
I can only hope I make it painless.
I’m hiding the knife against the small of my back, but as I enter the room, I might as well have stabbed myself with it.
Penny’s asleep. Curled up on my side of the bed, her hair fanned over my pillow. Her skin radiates gold where the light of the lamp touches her. HerFor Dummiesbook is open at the end of the bed; a cup of tea sits half-drunk on the bedside table.
Emotion closes my throat. Fuck, I wasn’t expecting this. She’s in my bed, my home, asleep. She can’t even sleep in her own bed, but now she’s sleeping in mine. The sight should make this easier, but it only makes me want to claw my fucking heart out of my chest.
I’m sure it’d hurt less.
Grinding my molars, I take a step forward. The floor creaks under my foot, and Penny jerks awake. Her gaze is unfocused, her hair mussed as she props herself up on the pillow. When her eyes slide to mine, they sharpen.
She bolts upright. “I’ve done something awful, please don’t hate me.”
My grip tightens on the knife handle. “What?” I growl.
The covers crumple at her feet as she scurries up to the headboard. “Say you won’t hate me first.”
I glare at her. “Penny,” I warn.
She sighs, drops her attention to my shoes, and fingers her lucky necklace. “I found a cheat code on some dodgy website for Mario Kart. But instead of adjusting my score, it just deleted yours. All your trophies, too.” She glances up at my stony expression. “I’m sorry, okay! I know I said I wouldn’t swindle anymore but I just couldn’t resist. You’re always so smug about being better at it than me. I just…” She scowls. “It makes me want to bite you.”
