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There was too much worry, too much sickness, too much work. She was weary from it all.
She didn't blame Joshua for his attitude, but he had changed since their parents took sick. They both had and she wasn't sure it was for the better. Someday they might both look back and realize that life does go on, but right now, she was doubtful of that. She felt no life, and despite her efforts, there wasn't enough time to erase all the pain.
Except when she looked at the scout. Something stirred deep within her, just looking at him. She should feel embarrassment, but she didn't. She felt a strange and tiny thread of a bond with this man. She didn't understand it. How could she bond with a stranger, a breed as he was called? She didn't see him as a breed though, she saw him as a man, a good man.
After cleansing the area, and placing a quilt from her mother's bedside trunk on the scout, she joined her brother. He hadn't made a lot of progress on the graves. Something inside her moaned with the aches of their struggles, but she tossed it aside and got the pitchfork to help loosen the hard dry dirt.
After all, work was all they had right now. And somehow work managed to keep their feelings hidden, their minds clear enough to function.
Together they struggled over the graves for a couple or three hours. The sun showed no mercy. Sweat trickled from every direction, at times so profuse she could not see. The stings of it blinding her, temporarily. Finally she took out the handkerchief from her skirt pocket and wiped it away.
She happened to look up and saw Hawks from the ridge above them, staring down. What did he want? Why was he there everyday? Had he seen them burying the soldiers? Would he report it to the Fort? All manner of questions ran through her mind, but she slowly calmed herself and willed herself not to worry. Worry could kill.
"It ain't deep enough," Joshua sighed, his chin resting on the end of the shovel as he surveyed their work much later.
"It doesn't matter. It'll have to do. I'm just too tired to go on."
"He seen us, Katherine." Josh nodded toward the ridge.
"Yeah, I know. It's a wonder he hasn't come down to ask about it. I wonder why he hasn't?"
"Maybe we should have burned them." Joshua glanced at her.
"I don't think so. Pa said once that the bones don't usually disappear when you burn them, and we'd still have to bury that part. This will have to do. I'm just too exhausted to go on. We'll throw some hay on top and disguise it. Maybe it'll be a while before we hear from anyone."
"Yeah sure." Joshua looked about. "Maybe there won't be any animals come smelling about either. This isn't going to work. We gotta dig it deeper."
Katherine glanced at Joshua, her hands on her hips, her mouth set firmly into a frown. She was tired of his negative replies. Her own strength was slipping. She needed support not more maybes.
"You gotta a better idea?" Her voice was bitter. "I'm simply too tired to dig any longer. The earth is hard as rock."
"I know." He frowned.
"Then let's scatter the hay. I'll have another look at the scout." She turned to leave him. She saw Hawks ride away again. He'd seen them; he was bound to know they were burying soldiers. So why hadn't he come snooping? It made no sense. He seemed to know everything else they did. Why not this?
"What's his name?" Josh broke through her reverie.
"I don't know. They called him a scout, is all I know. Guess he'll tell us soon enough."
"What are you gonna do with him?"
Katherine whirled about, her skirt flying; "I'm not going to do anything with him. I'm nursing him back to health, that's all."
"Then what?"
Joshua wanted answers, she had none. She was tired, weary, and disgusted with her life. She had no answers. She only knew she couldn't let the man die. Not after he saved her.
"We'll just have to wait and see, Joshua." She shook her head at his intense glance. "Well what did you want me to do, let him die? Do you honestly want to become a murderer?"
Joshua flinched from her words. "I guess not," he added his head going down.
Katherine marched to her brother's side, grabbed him to her, the first time she had touched him since before her parents took sick. He didn't move, didn't give an inch, but he was crying. Thank God! At least he was letting something out. He cursed himself for the action, but she only held him more tightly. She held on to him for a long time, both absorbing what strength they could from each other.
"If they'd have touched you, I'd have murdered them myself," He muttered, his voice sounding more like a child than a man.
Katherine smiled against his shoulder,(.) "I know. I'm a little surprised the scout could or would help me with his hands tied. Or even that he would attempt to. He can't be as bad as they said he was." Katherine shook her head and pulled away to look at her brother.
"Is he Indian?"
